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-"Change the subject

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"Change the subject."
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After a long flight, Clint landed the jet in a location unfamiliar to most of the Avengers. Svetlana had managed to force herself into a more awake mindset and declined when Clint offered to help her out of the jet, already supporting a struggling Natasha. As much as Svetlana trusted Clint and wanted, no, needed the help, she didn't want to accept it.

The Avengers walked towards the unknown house ahead of them, Tony, Steve, Thor and Bruce looking at it in confusion.

"What is this place?" Thor asked as he stepped onto the front porch.

"Safe house." Tony shrugged at his suggestion.

"Let's hope." Clint joked, pushing open the front door. He walked into the cosy house, everyone following. "Honey? I'm home!" A very surprised, and very pregnant, woman walked around the wall and most of the Avengers looked at her in confusion. "Company. Sorry, didn't call ahead."

"Hey." Laura beamed, kissing Clint softly before hugging him.

"This is an agent of some kind." Tony said to the others.

"Gentlemen, this is Laura." Clint introduced, both Natasha and Svetlana trusted enough by Clint to know his wife and children.

"I know all your names." Laura chuckled, standing cuddled to her husband's side. Tony lifted a hand in awkward greeting as footsteps could be heard coming closer to them.

"Ooh. Incoming." Clint joked as two children barrelled down the stairs to say hello, a young girl and a slightly older boy.

"Dad!" the girl cheered.

"Hi, sweetheart." Clint grinned and picked her up, hugging his son to his side. "Hey, buddy. How are you guys doing?"

"These are... smaller agents." Tony added.

"Look at your face! Oh, my goodness!" Clint said, kissing his children hello, placing Lila back down.

"Did you bring Auntie Nat and Auntie Svet?" Lila asked, staring up at her father and Clint gasped for dramatics.

"Why don't you hug her and find out?" Natasha joked, stepped forwards as Lila rushed at her, jumping into her arms.

"I hope I can get a similar greeting." Svetlana spoke up, plastering on a smirk as Lila grinned and reached over to hug her too, hanging off the both of them.

"Sorry for barging in on you." Steve apologised.

"Yeah, we would have called ahead, but we were busy having no idea that you existed." Tony hummed.

"Yeah, well, Fury helped me set this up when I joined. He kept it off S.H.I.E.L.S.'s files. I'd like to keep it that way." Clint explained as Svetlana placed Lila down on the floor gently. "I figure it's a good place to lay low."

Thor took a step and Lego crunched under his shoes. Natasha went to greet Laura, asking about the baby, which turned out to be a traitor because he was no longer going to be called Natasha due to the surprise that he turned out to be a boy. Svetlana stared down at Lila as the girl stood by her side, holding her hand.

Her mind flashed to the girl she'd killed in the Red Room, the girl who was a similar age to Lila, never to age any more. Forever a child because of her. She inhaled sharply and clenched her other hand into a fist, trying to force back to memory. Svetlana didn't want to seem weak in front of everyone around her, choosing to ignore how she had been in the jet.

Lila walked away from Svetlana to inspect Thor, who looked down at her curiously. Toast pinged up in the toasted and Svetlana flinched at the sudden sound as Thor left the house and Steve followed to talk to him. Natasha looked over at Svetlana with soft eyes, silently asking if she was okay. Natasha knew she wasn't, of course, but she still cared.

Instead of making any sort of indication that she was even partially okay, Svetlana stared down at the floor.

Soon, the Avengers dispersed around the house and Svetlana made her way to a bedroom she'd stayed in plenty of times. After a quick shower, she changed into some spare clothes and lay down on the bed placed against the wall.

She needed to be distracted. She let rethinking of the things she'd been forced to see, the things she'd been made to hear. But she'd done them, it was all her fault that they happened. At least that's what she thought anyway.

Deciding she needed to think of anything else, Svetlana reached for her phone that she'd snatched up on the jet and called Sam. It rang for a while and she contemplated just hanging up to avoid talking about it, wondering what he'd say. However, Sam answered happily.

"Hey, Svet! Sorry, I was in the shower. How'd it go?" Sam asked cheerfully. Svetlana could've sighed in comfort and relief at the sound of his voice. She could hear the smile in his tone and pictured it in her mind to avoid thinking of anything else.

"It could've been better." She answered, voice quiet and hesitant.

"What happened?" Sam asked worriedly. "You okay?"

"Oh, I'm fine." Svetlana lied. "How's Sarah feeling?"

"She's not too bad, now. She slept a lot, which helped. Although, she's irritated I told her to stop for a few days." Sam chuckled and Svetlana smiled, despite the fact he couldn't see it.

"Good. Glad she's feeling better." Svetlana said softly.

"What happened, sugar? You don't sound fine." Sam said. "What happened?"

Svetlana was silent for a moment before deciding to tell him what had happened, but not about what she'd been forced to relive, "The enhanced were with Ultron, the volunteers from the HYDRA base. One of them, the woman, managed to use her abilities on everyone except for Clint and Tony. She made everyone see something they really didn't want to."

"Shit. They feeling any better?" Sam asked.

"I think so. Still shook up, especially Bruce. I'm assuming you've seen the news." Svetlana muttered, rolling onto her side.

"Yeah, I did. It's on most channels right now." Sam hummed. "She made you see something, too, didn't she?"

"Yeah." Svetlana admitted quietly, sighing shakily.

"D'you wanna talk about it or shall I change the subject?" Sam asked softly, understanding evident in his tone.

"Change the subject." Svetlana decided, a small smile easing onto her lips. "I just wanted to talk to you, Голубь."

"Is it 'pigeon' or 'dove' right now?" Sam asked, a playful tone twinging his voice as he grinned down the phone.

"Oh, I don't want to inflate your ego." Svetlana joked.

"No, no, inflate it." Sam replied quickly.

Svetlana chuckled, her previously racing heart slowed into a calming beat as she spoke with him. The pair continued to chat and make jokes between themselves, bringing Svetlana's attention from her forced vision. While talking to Sam, despite the many miles between them, Svetlana managed to feel as though he understood her.

And he did. Sam would never know what her life before escaping the Red Room was truly like, even though he'd seen the leaked files, and he would never try to pry the information from her unless she wanted to open up to him. However, he understood having trauma. He had his own from the military and he tried to help other former soldiers with their own.

But Svetlana felt comfortable with Sam and she didn't want him to know what she knew about herself.

{1235}

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⏰ Last updated: Jun 13, 2023 ⏰

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