50 Things I Hate About You

I Hate You Name

I was in the midst of filling in a graphic organizer for Chemistry when a clanking sounded against the table beside me.

Against my better judgement, I snuck a quick, sideways glance in the direction of the noise and immediately regretted it. Onyx had walked in seconds before the bell sounded and the rest of our classmates filed into the cold room. Deciding it'd be best to clear the air between us before he could make any remarks, I opened my mouth in an attempt to offer a greeting, but he grasped my hand in his own, drying every word on the tip of my tongue.

"I'm not trying to hurt you." he said upon seeing my expression. He picked up what he'd dropped between us, a bracelet with a single charm; a black Onyx stone. It'd blended so perfectly into the black Epoxy that I hadn't seen it in my peripheral.

"What are you doing?" I asked, eyeing him cautiously. "Can you please let go of my hand?"

He blatantly ignored my request and fit the bracelet around my wrist, only releasing my hand once he'd clasped it. He then turned his back to me to pull his notebook and pencil from his bag, avoiding my questioning eyes on him.

"Onyx." I repeated, poking him with the eraser end of my pencil. "What is this?"

I jangled the bracelet between us, but all he did was answer with a one shoulder shrug and a quiet, "A bracelet."

I narrowed my eyes, poking him with my eraser again. "Yeah, I see that, but why is it on me?"

He finally set his pencil down and turned in his chair to face me. "Because you said you hated my name. That's my namesake, Sky."

I eyed the stone, then looked to Onyx, "I'm aware."

"Well, you're going to wear it until you like it." he continued, dusting pencil shavings off his black sleeve. "Feel privileged. I've never given a chick jewelry before. And I'm sure no guy has ever given you anything."

The words came out so harsh that I literally had to scoot my chair to the opposite end of the table. This sent a squealing noise through the room and brought all attention to in the middle of it. Onyx must have realized his words had come out aggressively because he glanced in my direction with a shake of his head.

"Look, I didn't mean that. It was a dicky thing to say."

"Sure was." I muttered, more to myself than him.

What stung wasn't that he'd said it; I was used to Onyx's unfiltered thoughts. I used to like to joke his brain was like the filter of an old fish tank. Worked on occasion, but more times than not it was a dud. It'd gotten him into a countless number of fights, and I'd heard his mother spend an entire evening crying to my own over the venomous words. What hurt was that he wasn't wrong. This was my Senior year and I hadn't had a boyfriend since early Freshman year, but I'd always liked it that way. I didn't have to deal with the unnecessary drama, the hell of being on a leash every second of every day, and I wouldn't just be walking a thin line that would eventually snap and lead to heartbreak.

Much to Angie and my mother's sadness, I believed love was nothing more than a fantastical dream every person wished to obtain but most never quite really did.

"Sky, seriously." Onyx nudged my leg with his own. "I'm sorry."

"It's whatever." I muttered, training my eyes on the Periodic table that Mr. Harlow had projected onto the screen. "Just pretend it wasn't said."