He's In The Stars

6. Cut

Tw: I will not warn again

Felix looked in confusion as he read the paper Hyunjin wrote on. "Hyunjin... why do you only have three things on your bucket list?" Hyunjin looked back at him with a smile. "Because, that's all I ever wanted to do." Felix looked back down at the paper, " number 1, watch stars with Felix, number 2, spend time with Felix, number 3, have..." Felix stopped reading the last thing, then beginning to blush. Hyunjin immediately turned around with a smirk on his face and sat down next to Felix on the bed. "Why are you blushing?" Hyunjin asked. Felix just continued to blush as he avoided eye contact with Hyunjin.

Hyunjin then pushed Felix, making him lay down on the bed, then Hyunjin hovered over him. Felix continued to avoid eye contact, even though it was near impossible. "W-why do you want to do that with me?" Felix stuttered. Hyunjin chuckled. "Well, I don't want to die before I make you feel the best you've ever been." Felix covered his face with his hands, making a weird noise. Hyunjin then placed his body on Felix, hugging him. "We don't have to do it if you don't want to. I'll wait for you, as long as I can." Felix said a small okay before he pushed Hyunjin off of him and sprinted out of the bedroom, all the way into the kitchen. Hyunjin just laughed as he followed, only to stop walking because of the coughing.

It was so bad that Hyunjin began to cough up blood. Felix soon came into the room and went into the bathroom to get Hyunjin some tissues. He quickly ran to Hyunjin and sat him down on the bed before he fell.

As Hyunjin calmed down, he began to pant, extremely out of breath. Felix sat next to him, trying his best to stay strong, for him. "Hyunjin, are you okay now?" Felix asked. Hyunjin didn't say anything as he continues to pant. Felix then raised his hand to wipe the blood that was on his lips, cheeks, hands, and clothes. Hyunjin then leaned forward and rested his head on Felix's forehead, taking deep breaths. "I'm sorry." Hyunjin whispered, repeating that sentence over and over again. Felix then pulled him into a hug, resting hyunjins chin on his shoulder. "You don't need to be sorry. I'm sorry I don't know how to help you." Hyunjin shook his head. "You did your best." Hyunjin then laid himself down in the bed, pulled Felix to lay down with him. Soon enough, Hyunjin fell asleep with his arms wrapped around Felix.

After a few minutes, Felix slowly got up off the bed and walked into the bathroom. He quickly closed the door and he then opened the medicine cabinet with shaky hands, pulling out small scissors.

Felix had a big secret that he hid from everyone. Simply put, he cuts himself. He never felt better about himself, it was just a way to cope with the pain of everything. His break-up with his past partner, stress from his job, and most of all, helping Hyunjin. He didn't hate helping him, it just scared him to the point of cutting his wrists because he didn't want to loose the only person he loves.
The first time Felix ever cut himself was when he was 16 and in school. He got bullied to a point where he was admitted to the hospital from being beat up as well as the cutting. His grades also got to him as well.

Felix slumped down, leaning against the bathtub as he held the glistening pair of scissors to his wrist. He took a deep breath in, fulfilling his lungs before he pushed the blade deep down into his pale white skin. Pain coursed throughout his body, starting from his arms, but he felt a wave of relief flow through him as a few wet tears slid down his face. Immediately after he pulled the blade against himself, crimson red tore a line down the direction he had sliced. Felix quickly grabbed a tissue and put it on his wrist in a sorry attempt to try and stop the blood flow. It was so hard to watch as it the bright red dripped from his arm to the pale floor but at the same time it was impossible to look away. Tears streamed down his eyes as he continued to watch. Soon, Felix felt a wave of dizziness take over, so he closed his puffy red eyes, taking in a deep breath, then letting it all go.

Felix stood up and looked at himself in the mirror. His tear stained face made him feel ugly, so he looked down at his red stained wrist and turned on the tap, running cold water over is cut wound. The water turned red as soon as he put it under, but gradually, it became more clearer, till the blood stopped. Felix then dried off his wrist and rolled down his sleeve, then putting his shaky hand on the doorknob, slowly turning it till the door opened.

He walked over to the bed and laid down next to Hyunjin who was still peaceful sleeping. Felix snuggled into Hyunjin's chest, immediately feeling relieved that he had someone who loved him.