The Bad Boy and the Nerd, Typical

Chapter 8: If No One Ever Knew

My hands instantly went to Ryder's as they rested at the curve of my waist, "what do you mean?"

The words sounded strange to me. Confusion was the emotion placed into my tone, and it was possibly the only emotion other than numbness and complete distress that I've corresponded to anyone all day.

"Doll, do you remember how when we were in elementary school, everyone would play those stupid games? Like Ninja and Tarzan?"

I smiled slightly, thinking back to Sarah's short, chopped hair that resembled mine and how she would always cover her face with the straight blonde pieces when playing Ninja, "yeah. I always watched everyone play. I was never really into the games."

"Nor was I," Ryder chuckled, his eyes flashing with a small amount of happiness before it died down again, "but Alex was. I remember watching him always run around, asking everyone if they wanted to play."

"Alex Fielder? I haven't seen him since our sophomore year?"

"During Freshmen Year, me and Alex were pretty close. We got into so much trouble, and to be honest, I loved it. I liked the way my heart raced. The way sweat clammed my palms with excitement. Everything. It was a good rush, and it helped me forget so much, but also remember so much. It was everything I needed. Sex all the time. Drinking constantly. Getting high nearly every time I went out. But, Alex was changing. He was more aggressive and hostile. He was no longer the little boy that loved to play innocent games. I realized he was addicted to the sex, the drugs, the alcohol, the rush- he was addicted to it all. Then again, so was I. I knew we needed to stop and things were getting out of hand when he got mixed up with the Northern Gang, but I needed the thrill. Finally, Alex hit the deep end. He went up to the gang leader, and demanded a task. This was our sophomore year. Greg, the leader, laughed at him. Told him if he really wanted a real task, he had to kill someone first."

Ryder paused, his thumbs brushing up and down against the curve of my waist. My breath hitched in my throat as I shifted slightly. Both the confession, and Ryder's movements had my heart racing.

"It's ok," I finally mustered, my voice still quiet and strained as Ryder's finger tips curved into my back, his thumb still brushing against me, "go on."

"Alex agreed. He loved playing those damn games. He lived for attention and thrill. Both were all he ever wanted.

"He had a week to kill someone. He refused to tell me who he had to kill, and I refused to talk to him until he told me. A week went by, and I was so irritated. I didn't want my best friend to kill someone. I never signed up for that. No murdering was supposed to go down. Nothing of that sort. Just a few stupid things here and there like graffiti on buildings, or maybe threatening, but never murder. I guess Alex didn't care much.

"I was so damn irritable, I fought constantly with my older brother all week. Things got bad, and I screamed at him. Pushing him as he pushed me. Finally, I told him to kill himself. He just stared me straight in the eye, shook his head, grabbed his coat, and left the house. He never came back that night. I woke up at three A.M to someone pounding on my door. Thought it would be my brother, but it was Alex. He had blood all over him, his hair was stuck in all places and was clumped from drying blood. He had killed someone and I knew it. He broke down and told me he had killed my brother. My own damn best friend had killed my brother. I called the cops, and told them what I knew. They found his body later in the river. He had been stabbed three times, shot twice, and pushed off the edge of the bridge. The fall broke three ribs, his arm, and his back. No way he would've survived. Alex gave the police every bloody detail, and they relayed those facts to me. He was pushed off the bridge exactly where you were going to jump. He was stabbed first, then shot. He coughed up blood and told Alex to tell me that I needed someone new in my life to change me. I don't know how he was able to talk, but he was shot in the legs, and stabbed in the stomach. By the time he finished talking, he was pushed into the river."