Chapter 18

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I go down the stairs slowly with Lilah in my arms so as not to wake up Selena

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I go down the stairs slowly with Lilah in my arms so as not to wake up Selena. This day was long and full of twists. First I finally meet my daughter... my beautiful, intelligent daughter.. Selena definitely well-educated her And I already love her too much to ever let them leave far from me, far from their home.

And then there was Pierre, I honestly refrained from killing him... but if I see him again I would not hold back . This motherfucker dared to touch and hurt Selena.. When I think about it I did the same thing I hurt her maybe not physically but I destroyed it by doubting her and cheating on her even if I was under the effects of alcohol I still cheated on her...

I put Lilah on the kitchen counter and take all the ingredients to make lasagna. "What's mommy sick from? » she whispers with a sad face and legs swigging forward and back. She so caring about other just like her mother, they both so perfect... gosh that's all I dreamed for, us as a family "I think she just tired from having so much fun today"

She Nods and listens to the instructions as the lasagna recipe progresses until a few hours later, our lasagna is finally ready even if the kitchen is a mess honestly.

I place her on her chair at the table and serve us a dish each when I hear light steps down the stairs. I turn my head and see Selena, her hair completely disheveled and makeup poured on her cheeks. " Mommy we made lasagna for you! "She smiles and sit on the table, I gave her my plate she whispers a thank you and I serve myself a plate.

We eat dinner like a real family, listening carefully to Lilah's stories, her dream where she turned into a mermaid or the day at school when she sang in front of her whole class. Stories that bring out amused laughter from me and Selena.

After I proposed to Selena to put Lilah to bed, she accepted him and I read her a story and she directly plunged into a deep sleep.

I go down the stairs and see Selena cleaning the kitchen. "Let me do that..." I take the sponge from her hand and clean the counter. She remains motionless for a few minutes "Thank you.... for today.. "I honestly don't know if she thanks me for protecting her, for taking care of our daughter or for coming to the birthday...but it doesn't matter I'm happy that she's ok .

"No. I should thank you for everything because I'm the one that did the mistakes all those years ago and I don't know how many times would be enough for you to forgive me but I will wait until forever...today was the third bay of my life..." we fall into a comfortable silence until the kitchen is clean.

I go to the door with Selena who follows me to lock the door after I leave. "Can I see Lilah again tomorrow maybe? "She simply nods and says to text her where and when then she was about to door the door on me when I block it with my hand "Tell me honest-" my phone rings and Yolanda's name appears large with a photo of us..... I had forgotten this detail...

I click hang up and raise my head towards the door to face a closed door....

I'm too tired to hear him talk about his fiancée and how he will soon get married and create his own family, blah blah

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I'm too tired to hear him talk about his fiancée and how he will soon get married and create his own family, blah blah...

I go back to the room and stare at the gift that Dante gave me this morning, should I open it or throw it away? Curiosity controls me at the moment so I open the box to face dozens of letters, old photos of us... The letters are numbered from 1 to 17 and they are accompanied by photos and a card...

𝑆𝑒𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑎 𝑎 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑢𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑠 𝑚𝑒 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑚𝑦 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝐼 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑟𝑢𝑡ℎ 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑒𝑥𝑐𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔. 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑣𝑒 𝑖𝑡 𝑠𝑜 𝐼 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢, 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑠𝑘 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠 , 𝑡𝑜 𝑎𝑑𝑚𝑖𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝐼 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑚𝑦 𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑓 𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑐𝑦 𝑎 𝑓𝑒𝑤 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑠, 𝐿𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝐷𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑒

I spent the rest of my night reading one by one the letters, those teaching me that we are still married, those explaining the situation of six years ago, the many letters of apology and those of gratitude where he thanks me for loving him, for being the mother of his child, for giving him a child...

Each letter makes me cry more than the other... until the last one when he begs me to forgive him and he talks to me about the lack he felt and he talks to me about the most sensitive and vulnerable facets of his life, of him...

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