Not your soulmate♡

~Chapter 50~

No....no no no

Reality shoots through me like being stabbed through the heart as I feel my legs give way as my strengh leaves me but the contact with the floor never reaches as my mind get fuzzier with my mind blank trying to protect myself from accepting it.

I shouldn't have took it. I should have accepted being soulmateless, this is lies, it's not true, it's not true

"Hey, hey Eun-hye I'm here. Don't be afraid I'm here"

Oh right...I'm being held right now...I'm in someone's arms...Aera...Aera

"A-Aera...the...the mark...it's fake right....it was a mishap of the injection right? It will dissapear...no no it's just my mind playing with me right?" I hear the quivering of my voice but it's hard to focus as I feel my body shake even though Aera is holding onto me tightly.

"Shoot...no I didn't think it would happen here, I'm so sorry little dove I'm sorry I should have known" I hear Aera and a sob rips out of me as my mind slowly returns to realising I can't play this off as fake.

I saw it with my own eyes, there is no way I can deny it and I hate how I can instantly recognise the mark even with the small difference. I want to deny that it looks similar and believe it is just a mistake of the eye but I'm not that delusional.

All of this progress...for this? This is my payment for suffering?! I didn't want this! I don't want this! Not anymore!

"I...I want to go home Aera..." I cry leaning against Aera as she curses unfer her breath before I feel her kiss the back of my head tugging me upwards while holding onto me tight enough so I don't slip from her hold.

"We can go home, don't worry I'll get us home okay? We can go through this together at home with only the two of us I promise" I can hear the panic in Aera's voice and it makes me feel horrible. The most sensible side of me feels bad about ruining the night for Aera and her soulmates but every single emotion inside me is slowly dying to give way for the dark pit of emotions to burst free and I need to go home to try and ignore reality at home.

Time and place....always so so wrong....fate hates me I'm pretty sure...I'm cursed I know

It feels like poisen running in my veins as numbness fills my body shutting down my emotions and my vision blurs to a focus that is tunneled only to focus on what is in front of me. Shutting down is protecting me from breaking down right here and something in me is greatful for it but also so scared that I am busy reaching a point it won't return to normal again.

Yet...will it ever be normal? Will I ever get peace?

I need to get home fast

"Thank you Aera...I'm sorry" I whisper as she wraps her arm around my shoulders almost like she is protecting me from the outside and I suck in a deep breath still hearing the painfully soft beats of my heart in my ear as the sound drowns out once we reach the bathroom door and the sounds of other people blurs all together.

"We are going to move past the guys to take our stuff and then go straight home I promise. I'm sure Changbin won't mind giving us a ride home too-" I hear the way Aera cuts off her own sentence before she curses loudly and a part of my mind laughs since I know the reason it could probably be and honestly I'm not surprised but this feels awfully ironic to everything in my life at this moment.

Because honestly...why not? Why not just make it true that I did hear Namjoon's voice...why not?!

"Change of plans we are getting out now and I'm going to text one of the guys to bring our stuff. We are getting out now"