I've Never Stopped Loving Chris Mallon

CH 19 - The Psycho

I'm tired. So tired. But Chris keeps slipping me notes with the time written on them, and I keep sucking him off in the bathroom stall. He doesn't mention what he'd done to me. I don't mention it either. I come in, do what I'm here for, and get out. He's cold. Colder than he's ever been. There are no more gentle touches, no more kind words. It hurts. It hurts so much. I don't know how to get the nice Chris back. I'm not sure if I even want to. Because if I do, and he turns on me again, I'm not sure my heart will be able to take it.

I'm sitting with Melanie and Riley at our table when all the noise cuts out. One moment cafeteria is filled with chatter. The next there is nothing but silence.

A guy, and I'm calling him a guy, because there is nothing boyish about him, even though he isn't that much older than us, just entered the cafeteria. He's clad in black leather from head to toe and has a vicious-looking scar running down his face. His booted feet touch the ground but make no sound.

Justin da Costa. The one student in this school feared more than the Mallon brothers. He's 19, even though he's a junior. I don't know much about him. But what I do know is that he spent 2 years in a psych ward after he killed his father.

He's a loner. Doesn't speak to anyone unless it's with fists. He also never eats lunch in the cafeteria. Which is why everyone is staring at him. I tense up when I realize he's walking toward our table. I glance at Riley. She's watching him with a confused expression. I glance at Melanie. She's... waving him over with a huge smile on her face? What the fuck?

Justin's scarred lips pull upward into a grotesque expression. Melanie jumps out of her seat, runs to him, and jumps into his arms. Then they're kissing. No, not kissing. Devouring each other's mouths.

"Brandon, Riley, meet Justin." She pulls him into a seat beside her. "And sorry we got a bit carried away," she adds with a sheepish smile.

Riley gives a slow blink, her sign of processing the situation, then she goes back to reading. I nod at Justin. I don't want to come across as rude, but I'm too stunned to do more than that.

"Interesting choice," Justin says, looking at Riley's book. Serial killers. That's the name of the book. Riley prefers books about math and physics, but I've seen her reading all kinds of non-fiction books, true crime included. Her choice doesn't worry me. But what worries me is a shadow that passed over Justin's face when he read the title.

"Thank you. But this book is bad. It's filled with half-truths and unsupported claims. If you want to read a good book about serial killers, I recommend The Method and Madness of Monsters by Peter Vronsky." Riley turns a page and continues reading with a slight frown.

Justin lights up a cigarette. He pays no mind to the NO SMOKING sign not even 2 feet farther down. "Good to know." He exhales. The smoke curls around the table. I stifle a cough.

"I just remembered! There's something I have to do," says Melanie. "Riley, can you help me out?" Riley nods, stands up, and follows after Melanie. That leaves me alone with Justin. Real subtle, Melanie. Real subtle. I know she wouldn't do that if she thought Justin would hurt me. But she's naive. It wouldn't be the first time she put her trust in the wrong people.

I watch him warily. I don't know what to think of him. The Psycho. That's what the students call him. Insane. Murderer. But he has never hurt me. He even helped me out once. Sort of. It was after I found a snake in my locker. I scrambled back when I saw it... and crashed right into Justin's chest. I spouted a million apologies and tried to explain what happened. I was sure he was going to kill me. Instead, he pulled the snake out of my locker, wrapped it around his neck, and walked out of the school. It was the only interaction I ever had with Justin.

Our eyes meet. I fight the urge to run. I fight the urge to lower my eyes. It feels like a test. I don't know why, but it feels like a test. I keep our eyes locked. My heart is pounding. My breathing is fast and shallow. But my eyes are steady on his. Everyone says Justin has black eyes. That's not true. His eyes are brown. The darkest shade of brown I've ever seen. It's hard to read from them what's he thinking or feeling. It's the same with his mouth. The scar on his face forces his lips into a permanent snarl. It makes him look angry, even when he might not be.

"Let's make things clear. I don't give a fuck about you." I almost jump out of my seat when he starts to speak. "But Melanie does. And I do give a fuck about her. So I'm willing to go along with this for now." He blows out smoke. "What do you want me to do with him?"

I blink. "What?"

"Break a few bones as a warning, or put him in hospital until the school year ends?"

Is he talking about Chris? I stare at him in horror. "Did Melanie tell you to ask me that?"

"No. She wants me to scare him a bit. But that won't work him." He blows out more smoke. "So, what is it? Broken bones or hospital?"

My belly cramps at the thought of Justin beating up Chris. I have to fight bile coming up my throat. "Don't do anything to him. Please." Chris might have hurt me, but that doesn't mean I want him to get hurt in return.

"Isn't he giving you trouble?"

"Don't hurt him," I repeat. "Please."

"Whatever," he says, sounding disappointed... in me.

I saw Melanie twice after that conversation, but she was with Justin both times. I need her alone. I end up texting her and she meets me after the sixth period. "You've got some explaining to do."

"I knew Chris won't stop unless he's threatened. So... I told him you're under Justin's protection. He didn't believe me, of course. So... I spoke to Justin. And it all snowballed from there."

"All right. Wow. And the kiss?" I ask.

"Oh, that." She grins. "I like him. I like him a lot."

"Are you two dating?"

"We didn't put a label on it. But... sort of?"

"You do realize he's dangerous, right? He might be a serial killer." I feel like she broke up with Taichi because of me. The fact that she found a new boyfriend and that she's so happy, should make me over the moon for her. And it would... if it were any other guy... but Justin?

She snorts. "He isn't a serial killer."

"How do you know that? He killed his own father!"

"That's just a rumor. You don't actually believe that, do you?"

I do. Or at least I did. Do I still? He has never hurt me. But I don't trust him. Why is that? Because of the scar? Because it pulls his face into a menacing expression? God, I'm such a jerk. I hate when people judge me because of the color of my skin. Am I not doing the same to Justin? Judging him over something he can't control? "I don't. But... still... be careful. All right?"

She nods. "You worry too much. But I'll be careful. I promise."

A/N: First impression of Justin?

A/N 2: Do you know I'm currently writing Melanie's and Justin's story? You can find it on my other account under the name of Not Your Typical Good Girl x Bad Boy Story.