meet again (stan x kyle)

4 (1038 words)

⚠️read the a/n at the end of the story it's important⚠️

I think I'm in love with Kyle.

Kyle's pov

I've always felt like I was missing out with things when I was younger.

I always saw people falling in love with each other. Kissing, hugging, the loved look. I always missed out.

Of course, some people fell for me. Like Bebe in 5th grade, she told me that she likes me. I loved the idea of someone just someone loving me. Not thinking I'm ugly with my hair. Not thinking I'm weird. Not thinking I'm ugly. Just someone thinking I'm beautiful. That my looks don't actually define who I am. Someone who actually thinks I'm a decent human being.

I really tried to love her back then. But I just couldn't.

Love is complicated. Loving someone doesn't always mean that you love them romantically. You can love them as a friend. You can admire them. You maybe want to be around them a lot. Just because you love them. But that doesn't always mean that you love them romantically. It can just mean that you care about them a lot. That you don't want them to get hurt. Hurt by others. Hurt by the world. But loving someone romantically is complicated, too. You can't obsess over them because that's weird. But if you don't show any love for them, you have no chance of having an actual romantic relationship with them. If you love someone, you feel warm around them. You also want to be around them all the time, but it feels just different with love. It feels like something is pulling you towards them. Like an investable rope. I don't know. Love if complicated. Just as I said.

But the feeling I had with Bebe didn't feel quite adequate with her. I felt more like loving her as a friend. As a best friend. Because I still care about her.

I told her how I felt, but she just looked at me in pity. And told me that I'm weird. That I have to love her. I told her that I didn't know what love felt like.

She just pushed me away from her. And I never talked to her again. I don't even know what college she's going to.

In 10th grade, I found out why I never felt attracted to girls.

A new boy moved to South Park. His name is Thomas. We became friends, and he never said something about my hair. We became best friends. And whenever I was around him, I got really hot and had butterflies in my stomach.

In 11th grade, I told him, and he just straight up told me I'm disgusting to my face.

He told everyone in school that I'm gay and everyone told me I'm disgusting and weird. They beat me up every day just because I'm gay.

"Pinky promise?" Kenny asked Stan. He pointed his pinky towards Stan. Stan connected his pinky with Kenny's. "Pinky promise."

I smiled at them.

I looked over at Butters, who was smiling bright.

"Me and Butter are gunna explore a bit. Do you 2 wanna come with us?" Kenny asked us.

I nodded and looked over at Stan. Stan hesitated a bit but nodded, too.

We walked out of our dorm room and started going down with the elevator.

It was quiet. Really quiet. It was  awkward. Really awkward.

We saw the doors from the elevator open and stepped outside.

Of course, we went to the open day from this college, but we didn't really see much.

We saw a big library with a lot of people in it. There was a big cafeteria where you could get breakfast, luch and dinner. I looked over at the people sitting there, but 1 person looked weirdly familiar.

I looked closer and saw him sitting there. Eating a fucking four course meal. The fucking fatass.

I signed loudly. "There's no way!" I screamed. Everyone looked at me, and I gave them a 'what' look. I heard snickering coming from Cartmans table. Me, Stan, Kenny, and Butters walked to him.

"How did you even get here, Cartman? You suck at any art things." Kenny asked Cartman.

"Well-." Cartman tried to say, but I cut him off. "Your mom probably slept with the principal to get you in didn't she?" I said laughing.

I heard Stan, Kenny, and Butters laugh, too.

"Really funny, Kahl. It's really funny. But I actually don't suck at art. I just have a different art style, then ya'll." Cartman told us.

"Okay, so your mom slept with the principal. We get it, Cartman. There's no need to hide it." Stan said, grinning.

"And since when are you back here, Marsh? And I thought you hated Kahl." Cartman asked Stan.

Stan started blushing a bit and grinning more.

"Well, I actually never did. So piss off, bye!" Stan told Cartman while walking away.

I started laughing uncontrollably. I started walking towards Stan and so did Kenny and Butters.

I looked at Stan. He had a light pink tint on his face. He licked his lips and looked at my lips for a second and started smiling at me.

That was a bit gay

But I liked it, it made me feel warm.

And loved

Stan's pov

I think I'm in love with Kyle.

But that can't be I have a girlfriend and I really love her. I really do. She's my everything. But why do I feel so good around Kyle. And why do I blush around him all the time. AND WHY DID I LOOK AT HIS LIPS. He saw that. I just know. It was a stupid action.

Me, Kyle, Kenny, and Butters started walking towards the entrance when I saw Wendy walking in.

She saw me and waved at me. I waved back, obviously.

I started walking towards her.

"Hi, Wendy." I said. "Hi, Stan." She said as she pulled me in a hug.

I hugged her back and smiled.

I pulled away and kissed her. She kissed me back. But tell me why I feel like that kiss didn't mean anything. I didn't feel the love in that kiss like I used to feel. My love doesn't feel valid.

And I don't know if I still want to feel that love.

A/n

If you got a message yesterday that I updated the story I did that by accident. I just wanted to save it but clicked on publish by accident😭. Anyway I forgot to put some tw's in so I'm just gunna say it now but I'm still gunna put it in the description. TW: MENTION OF EATING DISORDERS, MENTION OF SUICIDE AND SUICIDAL THOUGTS AND MENTION OF SELF HARM.