Constructing Manwiches

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Inspired by sent by a youtube short sent by my buddy Bas <3
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/6gOopG4bXHc
~~~

*Phone app notification goes ping*

TikTok – KillerCook has uploaded a new video. Check it out!

Title: Constructing Manwiches
Description: Making the boys some lunch in an unorthodox way. What's your favorite tool?
5 minute video. The thumbnail is Killer wearing his trademark blue and white striped helmed topped by a yellow hard hat.

*Press Play*

"Hey everyone! KillerCook here for a short one today. Between the four of us, we manage a repair shop that's attached to a car garage that we also own for our day jobs. We've had some big projects recently and we're all pulling double shifts to get our orders done in time. So, apologies that I haven't been making content lately during this lull period! Today, I'm going to prep some sandwiches for the guys so we can keep on working. Recipe is in the caption, let's get to constructing these bad boys."

The head chef was wearing a half-unbuttoned, navy-blue jumpsuit with a beat up white tank top underneath. Perfectly chiseled muscles unfairly hidden under the tight-fitting uniform. He tied his apron over his outfit and then pulled out a yellow safety hat from off-camera and placed it on his covered head.

"Presenting: the ingredients—"

The camera panned to the countertop that had a line of uncut deli meats, veggies, cheeses, spices, and seasonings spread out in an organized fashion. At the end of the row sat a pile of long bread loafs.

"—And the tools to make our lunch."

The camera panned to the kitchen table. Lined across the wood were literal construction tools. A circular saw, a smaller handsaw, a chisel, a bolster, a hammer, a wide head pan, measuring tape, a putty knife, a trowel, a disc grinder, a small torch, and of course, toothpicks.

The next few seconds showed Killer dramatically sliding on construction gloves, snapping safety glasses over the face of his helmet, and tying his hair back in a messy, low bun. The synth-pop beat of a song playing in the background accompanied his video.

As was common with TikTok videos, the next few minutes were short clips of Killer preparing the food using the tools to make the titular 'Manwiches.'

Using the circular saw, Killer sliced the bread loaves apart. With the ruler he measured the length of each loaf half and then measured the meats, cheese, and vegetables. He utilized the smaller handsaw and bolster to chop the produce and deli ingredients to size. Killer picked up the head pan and began adding spices, seasonings, and wet ingredients, mixing them together with the chisel to create the signature sauce.

Stepping back to grab the torch, Killer used it to lightly toast the bread. Starting with the most cooled half, Killer reached for the putty knife and dipped it into the head pan, spreading the sauce over the bread.

Killer used the trowel to place layers of meat, cheese, and vegetables down one after another, each layer separated with a thin layer of oil, mayonnaise, and Dijon mustard, respectively. Before he placed the top half of the bread over the nearly complete sandwiches, he sprinkled salt and pepper from his fingertips like a diva chef. A certified meme.

With the sandwich constructed, Killer picked up the ruler again and began placing the toothpicks 5 inches apart from each other, using the hammer to lightly tap them through the thick sandwiches. Grabbing the disc grinder, he gave the sides of the loaves a once-over to trim the fallout. Wiping down the handsaw, Killer used it to cut the loaves into handheld sandwiches, the toothpicks helped keep the stuffed ingredients stabilized as he cut them into shareable sizes. A cute spinning logo led the transition to the next scene, the logo flying far too fast to make out.

For a moment, the camera was blurred and unfocused due to four sandwiches being pressed right up to the lens, only to be pulled back by the four hands of the housemates. As the sandwiches cleared the focal point, Wire, Heat, and Kid came into view as they brought their sandwiches to their mouths, taking large bites out of them. The camera zoomed in on their faces as each man's face reacted to the food.

Each hunk was wearing a one piece outfit – Heat and Kid wore similar jumpsuits to Killer, though Heat was the only one who wore his formally. Kid had taken the top half of his off, hanging over his hips with no undershirt on as his sweaty skin glistened against his sculpted, muscles on camera. Wire wore a short, striped romper, choosing fashion over work safety.

Kid's dimples were smeared with sauce, a bit of lettuce stuck to his lip as he chewed with bulging cheeks. How the food wasn't oozing through his wide smile was a mystery. Heat's eyes were closed as he took bite after bite of his sandwich, flashing a thumbs up at the camera.

Wire had one eye screwed shut and was pushing down the bridge of his nose as he ate his, "It's got a bit of a kick!"

Instead of verbal reviews, the three taste-testers/lunch recipients held up pieces of paper with hand drawn ratings of the food. Kid and Heat both held up two scythes crossed at the center, while Wire held up one scythe. The redhead and bluette glared at their tall friend who responded with a shrug.

Wire was not expecting to be hit by a sandwich but that's exactly what happened. From behind the camera, Killer threw his with such speed it appeared as a blur on camera, exploding on impact and showering Wire with sauce, meat, cheese, and veggies. Kid and Heat roared with laughter as Wire frowned at his stained short-sleeve romper, throwing a middle finger at the camera.

The video ended with the frame of Wire going through a glitch effect as the hue turned blue. At the end, KillerCook's logo floated to the center of the screen before the final video effect turned the show off.


Bonus: The comment section

Bolt.N.Nuts: I'm just a lost lil' bit looking for my power drill🥺
KillerCook: ...I don't even have words. Are you calling ME a tool?
PunkNeverDied69: Your 🍆 dude
KillerCook: Don't bring eggplants into this!

Merry1589: I'm a ground stake looking for the right sledgehammer.
PunkNeverDied69: Jesus Christ – Killer what did you start

Seri0usP3rson: My favorite tool is handsome and dumb as bricks
FlamingHot420: Now that's just mean.

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