Haywire (Yandere! Ticci Toby 🔥 X Fem! Reader 🪓)

crying through kisses

"You want to what-?" I said bluntly as I stared at him through the dim lit tent. Toby was curled into a tight ball on the tents floor. "N-No No.. I was j-just wondering w-we could sh-share..." He said a bit timidly.

"I thought I told you not to make it weird..." I said while turning to lay on my back. "There's not enough room for us both to fit in the sleeping bag..." I added. I felt my ears start to get warm at the thought of sharing a sleeping bag with Toby. It wasn't sharing the sleeping bag that made me feel flushed, but it was the fact that he was half naked. 

"Well I-it's not weird unless y-you make it w-weird..." Toby said while scooting an inch closer. "Why didn't you just bring one of your sleeping bags here? You had like two of them.." I said, turning my back to him. "B-because.. They were just as s-soaked as I was.." Toby sighed. I could feel his gaze staring at me, even though I wasn't looking back at him.

"You'll be fine.." I muttered as my face grew hotter and my ears were practically glowing red. Thank gods for the dim lighting.

"Please?" Toby said in a small voice as he shivered slightly. I turned my head to see him twitching and shaking a bit. I rolled my eyes and sighed, realizing how guilty I felt for not letting him share the sleeping bag.

You know what. It would be fine. It's not like it means anything. It's just because Toby's cold and I would feel terrible if he got sick. It's not like it would make us anything more than friends.

"Fine-" I said quickly, unzipping the sleeping bag. Toby crawled into the sleeping bag and snuggled up close. My entire body started to heat up and I bit my tounge not to say anything. Toby rezipped the sleeping bag and the rain started to pour down on the tent harder.

I felt Toby's cold skin pushed against mine. There was definitely not enough room in this sleeping bag for both of us. "Thank you.." Toby muttered, slowly wrapping his arms around my waist. "Is this okay?" He asked quietly with his chest pressed against mine.

"S-sure.." I gulped, keeping my arms at my sides. Toby let out a soft sigh and gingerly held his arms around me. He was so gentle and I couldn't wrap my head around it. How could one guy be a maniac one second but so sweet a few minutes later. Having the hands of a killer wrapped around me felt nerve wracking. But in a way I felt more safe than ever.

Toby's POV:

My heart was beating so fast I though it was going to jump out of my rib cage. In all honesty I could have cared less about how cold my body was. I just wanted that feeling from y/n again, the feeling I've been craving for years. The feeling she gave me exploded like fireworks in my heart. Which made me cling to her even more than before.

I could smell the earthy scent in her hair and the softness of her skin. The longer I was close the more addicting it was becoming. I felt my mind go into a hazy mush as I nuzzled my nose into her hair.

But at the same time I felt a weight in my stomach. I knew I needed to say something but I had no idea how to put it. I surely didn't want to make a fool of myself and loose the trust that took ages to build. But if I don't say anything I'd be no better than a liar.

"Um Y-y/n..?" I said softly, keeping my voice almost too quiet. "What..?" She whispered back. I hugged her a little tighter, "I-I want to tell you something..." I murmured. "Okay...?" She said hesitantly.

I felt a lump in my throat as I started to fumble the words out of my mouth. "Well u-um.. I probably s-should have told you a long time a-ago..but" I cleared my throat with a shaky exhale.

"I like you" I mumbled while holding y/n a little tighter in fear she would try and run away. "I know" y/n said quietly, "You said that when we were at the abandoned school, remember?"

"No y/n, I mean I like you.." I said while shaking my head slightly. "I-I'm sorry if that c-comes across as weird, b-because I'm a.. murderer but it's t-true.." I said shakily. Y/n stayed silent for a while and my stomach started to feel heavier.

"You really think of me like that..?" Y/n asked quietly. "Yes, I really do.." I said feeling embarrassed of the confession. I started to feel like I should have kept my mouth shut and enjoyed the moment.

"I'll give it a chance..." She whispered while resting her head in the crook of my neck. My stomach flipped and my breathing started to pick up. "R-r-really-?" I said in a hushed voice. "Yeah, we've gotten this far together, what could go wrong?" She chuckled softly and relaxed, letting her body melt against mine.

I was starting to think I was hallucinating again but even if I was I would hope it never goes away. I took a deep breath and melted into her embrace. I feel like I have gotten a thousand weights lifted from my shoulders.

"Does th-that mean you like m-me too?" I asked sheepishly, feeling an entirely different emotion flood my entire being. "Yes, Toby, I like you too" she snickered quietly. I let out a relieved chuckled and almost felt like I could cry.

A tear betrayed my eyes and ran down the side of my face. I wasn't a burden anymore. These new waves of emotion hit me harder than anything I've felt before. Before I could collect myself I let out a quiet sob. The one thing I've been missing out on my entire life was resting in my arms. I am finally loved.

Before I could mutter a word tears started to stream down my face. This sparked the attention of y/n and she immediately looked confused. "Wha- what's wrong?" She said with genuine confusion. "N-noth-ing.." I croaked as my body trembled.

"Are you crying...?" Y/n's confusion quickly turned to concern. "N-no it's j-just from the r-rain.." I sobbed. I cried for each time I wasn't loved. I cried for each time I was hated or hurt. I cried for each time I held back. Now I finally get to cry because I am finally worthy of the love I missed out on.

"You are definitely crying.." Y/n muttered under her breath. I felt her gentle touch brush the hair from my eyes. I let out another silent sob as she looked at my mess of a face. I shuttered when she gently touched around my scar. It made my skin tingle and note tears fall down my face.

I gently set my hand in top of hers and pressed it against my scar. My breath hitched and I closed my eyes to force any last tears out. For a few moments, all the terrible things I've done and seen didn't exist. I finally felt like a normal boy.

The incredible raging storm was nothing but a soft sprinkle. But I felt y/n slowly move towards my face and connect out lips together in a soft kiss. Utter bliss ran through my body as I kissed back just as gentle. Even though I didn't know what I was doing I held the kiss until I was left breathless.

Opened my eyes and we broke the kiss, pleasantly surprised by it all. "Does this mean w-we're like a thing now..?" I asked quietly. "Maybe.." She chuckled softly and leaned in for another kiss. I gladly accepted and kissed back while pulling her as close to my body as possible.

After a few seconds I pulled away and wrapped both my arms around her waist. She held me around the torso and nuzzled into the crook of my neck. A sense of butterflies invaded my stomach and I pressed a kiss against her temple.

I felt my eyes grow heavy from all the crying but it didn't stop me from holding onto y/n tightly. My body relaxed easily with a euphoric and fuzzy feeling in my mind. I felt a sudden protectiveness over her.

This is all so new and exciting but I can't help but feel exhausted from so much emotion. I was tempted to stay up to make sure she was okay. But I wasn't able to get a second though in before I was asleep.