{Hey , I'm posting this so you guys can have some stuff 2 read meanwhile I kinda go off w everything tysm for 45 reads love ya💝💝}
I scream into my pillow in frustration , how can someone be so naive but such a bitch at the same time? She betrayed me so many times and yet carries on talking shit.
She's like a dog chasing after a stick.
I wish she could just disappear into thin air and never come back.
So here I am.
Holding a tissue against my nose, staring into space.
I hear soft knocks on my door. And before I know it I see my mother standing in my room.
"You okay?" She says whilst sitting down next to me , I just nod.
"Don't let her take the best of you." She looks me into my eyes.
"I know it's hard and it's hurts like someone's stabbing you but I promise your life will turn good if you try."
There is nothing left to try, I have tried for alot of years , but it just turned out to be utter bullshit.
"Yea , okay." I say.
She softly hugs me and walks out of my bedroom.
I just wish she knew.
I just wish she knew how much pain I'm in and how much times I've fell down to the floor feeling everything cracking beneath me.
I get a notification from my phone.
Xander.
Xander - You okay?
°read°
I slam my phone face down onto my bed.
As much as I love him he still shattered my heart into a million pieces.and that's what's painful the most about love.
I don't bother going to school the next day.
I've had enough of everyone and everything I just wanted to take advantage of my own self and carry on drowning myself in this pure mess.
There's none to fix my broken heart and pick up the pieces. Instead they just tred on it like rubbish on the street.
I'm not going to waste anymore tears , or love.
It's time I focus what i want
And not what they demand me to do.
Maybe I'm ugly, maybe I'm fat , but they can carry on judging , they already changed me enough.
There's no more tears left to cry , or no more love left to love.
I've had enough of this world , this pathetic world.
Lord , give me something to live for , for once.
I look myself in the bathroom mirror getting scissors.
I start snipping my hair , shoulder length
I'll change for myself.
Not him, not her, not them
Myself.
And I know I fucked up either way
But it's too late to stop playing by my own game
Its time I follow the rules of something I made.
Revenge.
The next day , I pick up my bravery and go to school. I can feel people's eyes hovering up and down my body with dirty looks.
I hear a slam and there she is.
Xanders ex.
"You pussy , where have you been?"
"Too scared or where you just having a meltdown?"
I roll my eyes.
"You've had enough of me , I'm sick and tired of playing your stupid fucking games you whore.
No wonder you're single now , every single ones of your boyfriend's are either players or cheaters. None of them actually like you." I say out loud.
She looks at me deep in the eyes.
"Well , uhm I have to go." She says stuttering I can tell she's about to cry.
I pick my books up and walk to my class.
I sit down next to xander.
"Hey" he says.
I wave at him and smile
"New haircut?" He smiles
"Mhm"
"Right" he goes back to writing.
"I'm sorry , Jess " holding my hand.
"Its okay xandrr, it really is."
He gives me a fake smile and goes back to writing.
I can feel so many stares.
I sigh out.
"What you gonna fuck him like the rest of your mates?"someone calls out and everybody starts laughing.
"Shut the fuck up." Xander says slamming his hands on the desk.
"You've never had bitches anyway , so how would you know?" He says scoffing.
I smile.
