Joshua - Mental health

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Requested by - @__tsumi__

Joshua POV -

I was in my hotel room as we are in Japan for tour currently scrolling through social media, then I opened my account and went to my most recent post and I clicked on comments, I saw many people commenting that I should leave Seventeen and they said really hurtful words but there were also so fans supporting me and telling people who are hating on me to stop and that they have no right to tell me what to do with my private life.

I was so thankful that there were some fans who stood up for me and cared for me, I was feeling really sad and my heart ached so bad because people wanted me to leave after 8 years of being in the group, I am a human too, I have feelings too, why can't they just understand it and how could they just  blindly believe whatever was on the internet, what did I do to deserve this.

I do not want to tell my members about this because if they know that this is all happening they will be worried and will not focus on work or enjoying their time in Japan or giving their best in concerts.

I was reading more comments when Seungkwan came in to my room and snatched my phone from me, he then noticed that I was reading hate comments.

Seungkwan - Hyung are you okay?

Me - I am fine Seungkwan

Seungkwan - Hyung you can lie from your mouth but your face can never lie, you look so depressed.

Me - How can you read my face

Seungkwan - We have stayed together for more than 8 years isn't it obvious that we understand each other and you should not let these toxic fans get to you they have no right in judging your private life any way.

Me - I know Seungkwan but I just feel so sad, why can't they understand I am human or that I have feeling to, I am not a robot that has no emotions.

Seungkwan - I know hyung, I think it's best to tell it to Seungcheol hyung.

Joshua - Seungcheol hyung is sick himself I do not want to stress him out and also please do not tell the other members about it.

Seungkwan - Ok.

The next morning all the members came to me and gave me a lot of comfort. Their words were really sweet and comforting it touched my soul. I am so grateful to have them as my friends.

In the concert after all the performances were done, we all had to share some words with our fans, I just cried thinking about all the hate I received after calming down little by little I spoke to the fans and so many cheered for me. I realised that there are some toxic fans that hate me but there are a lot more fans who love me as their idol, that inspired me to work harder for them and stay strong. I gave them a smile in the end.

In the end I was just grateful for having amazing fans who loved me and my groupmates who support me through my hardest times, my mental health really got better after they all comforted me. I feel so thankful to have them as my friends.

Words - 545

Note - Please spread awareness about Joshua, it really hurts seeing him cry.


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