At Time's End

Chapter 21 - Nostalgia

I guess it was nice living alone for a while, taking a break from others. I had always been surrounded by people, mainly my own extended family. In fact, I loved being alone. That didn't mean I hated my family, I still loved them just the same, but they were pretty overbearing at times.

But from the second when those research center doors slammed open, revealing a tired, I-recently-jumped-through-time-looking lost woman, I don't think I would've had it any other way.

It was a normal day. Just a regular day. Nothing special, I had dropped two glass jars despite having the gift of telekinesis (thankfully both were empty), and I was kind of pissed about it.

Suddenly, I hear a crash from downstairs, and a muffled "Shit, that was loud". I rush downstairs to see what kind of trespassing criminal dared enter my home. 

"...Hello."

"...Jaiden? What the hell are you doing here?! How did you know I was here?" I didn't think too much, she just opened her arms and I ran straight into them. I mean, I hadn't seen her - my childhood friend - for, what, 20 years? That's a long time. "Never mind that. How've you been?!"

"Waiting, mainly. For probably around 10 years. The Waiting Room almost drove me insane!" She laughed. I hadn't heard that laugh in a long time... perhaps that was why it felt so special. "So, how's it been, slaving around in this dingy research station? I mean, aren't you bored?"

"Hey, it's not dingy!"

...A couple days, weeks, months pass. 

A common sight. "Hey, uhh, Eterna, any idea where these go?" she says, balancing 20 different things at once. A massive safety hazard, and I'd usually yell the person's ears off, but this time? Something stopped me from doing it.

"Didn't I tell you not to carry more than two things at onc-" CRASH. Then silence. Then a laugh, a laugh I've heard far too many times. Then my own. 

More months pass.

I banned her from the kitchen unless she's under my supervision... she reminds me of Ignus when I still lived with him. There's a burn mark on the ceiling above the cooking station now. Usually I'd chew anyone out over it, but she's just different. I hoped it wasn't feelings for her. I was wrong.

More months pass, and eventually we end up together. We go on a trip all the way to Venus, we even planned on visiting Earth, or what was left of it. Hell, we were planning marriage, an archaic custom of Terrans, still sometimes used by young fools who think they've found their forever.

Then it all came crashing down in flames. 2728 was by far the most painful year of my life  thus far. You've surely heard enough about it.

I was furious. Not at the patient, not at Jaiden, at myself. How could I make such a careless mistake? In the end, I dumped all of that frustration on the only living person in the room. I grasped at all the straws, all of them, just to blame it on someone other than me. Which was, of course, horrendously selfish.

I stormed off. I thought we could salvage it. I was stupid. 

The door into my room slammed open.

"Jaiden. Fuck off." I muttered. "I need to think. Leave me alone."

"That's what I'm planning to do." I turned around, and saw her, hand on her watch and fire in her eyes.

"What the hell are you going to do? Travel to before this and fix it? Both of us know it's not possible for you," I scoffed, not having a single clue about what would happen in a minute.

"No." She smiled. "Travel so far nothing can save me." 

"What.. do you even mean with that? Come on, you can't just leave. Look, maybe we can just, forgive each other and..." I opened my hands into an embrace.

She returned the gesture. The watch shattered. We hugged it out, and had our good ending.

...is what I'd like to say.

"Jaiden, no. Why are you spinning that further.. Stop! NO-" Through all my panicking, she just kept on smiling. And, finally when she stopped, she waved one last time, and left me alone, to fix the entire situation on my own.

Understandably, I was devastated at first. Then came the wave of denial, then anger. It was like a textbook definition of grief, so spot on it almost makes me laugh. Bargaining, depression, and as I waited in suspense for the fifth stage - acceptance - I came to realize it was never to come at all. I looped back to frustration, creating my own fifth stage - anger, again.

From that moment on, I swore up and down, if Jaiden was still alive, I would never look her in the eyes again, would she ever return.

I disappeared once. Effect of bargaining. What if she was still alive? What if she was back? What if I found her and tore her face off for what she made me endure? What if.. what if... what if I ran away? What if all I left behind was a rushed note, telling the finder - Ignus - not to worry, and not to call the Jurisdiction Affairs?

I came back, however. I came back after the high of adrenaline from escaping wore off. I can't remember what I felt back then, maybe pleasant, maybe wanting to end it all. Still, one thing never changed. My hatred for Jaiden.

It was juvenile hatred, I admit, considering it was never even her fault, but could you truly blame me for it? Probably. But can you say it wasn't even a tad deserved? She disappeared, with near to no warning, right after someone died, leaving one - at that moment unstable - person to handle it all.

Then, she returned. Repeat opening act of this chapter, except this time I'm about 92% more pissed. There was yelling, mainly from my part - she just stayed calm and collected the whole time. She had always been like that, it's rare to hear her yell in an argument, no matter how heated it gets. Either she yells just to get others' attention, or then she's travelled back to 2728 and is living through the painful after effects of living through the same trauma twice.

And now? Now it's over. And I guess I should be sad, but there's something that's keeping me from falling into that abyss. Another person, perhaps?

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AN: woah i overestimated the time that would take, anyways hope you enjoyed! :)