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TWO ✃ SHE STAYS ON YOU LIKE A TAN.
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2020
𝕾he was like the wind. A breath would come, suddenly sweep over you without hesitation, and then disappear again lost in the abyss. Yet another breath came, but it is not the same as the previous one. This one is calmer, less fleeting and permissive.
I am sorry to admit to myself, as to all the readers here, that my experience of love is not to be taken as an example. Not when I fell in love with that sweet girl with badly cut bangs, wavy brown hair and a made-up face, a character so bubbly that she could send me into turmoil within half a second. Like a gust of freshness.
However, the fact remains that I had never really understood Marylin, perhaps because she was still a young woman at her first experience with life, infantile in some ways, a child when there were decisions, but wonderful at consoling others. I had always thought she was suited to me, created to fit me, engraved in my heart like a disease, unstoppable. But sometimes it was not enough, I was not enough for Marylin, just as she did not fill me. It is complicated, almost impossible, for all the time I had spent observing her like a maniac and learning her moves.
No, there was something.
That was holding me back. She kept me still, just long enough to ask me some questions. And she'd disappear like the wind, sometimes she'd come back, and sometimes I'd say I hated her for that bad temper she had. It wasn't her fault. She had done it because she didn't really want to hurt me. Hadn't she realised that with her absence I was only getting worse? Me, a mature and complete man, dead and buried for a little girl who didn't know the world?
It seems cowardly to deny things, it's not like me, but Marylin was my animal side. And gentlemen, I would like to explain why.
𝕴 first noticed her when I was in my forties, in my heart I had experienced full fledged love, unbridled love, the kind of love that leaves you speechless, and also the kind of affection with some lack behind it. Who had never experienced that?
