𝙛𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙪𝙨 || 𝙟𝙤𝙖𝙤 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙭

𝗳 𝗼 𝘂 𝗿 𝘁 𝘆 𝗲 𝗶 𝗴 𝗵 𝘁*

FEEL BETTER?
"you make me laugh when i'm not even in the mood to smile"
*smut, but also cute fluff before. read at your own risk*

~joão~

we lost again tonight. chelsea has been doing terrible lately, and even though i'm trying my hardest to pick up the team and encourage everyone, it obviously isn't working on the pitch.

mason has been moping around since harper left and it makes me want to scream at him. i know what it feels like for someone you love to leave you, lyla left me twice, but he needs to forget about it and focus on the team improving.

we all need him out here and if he doesn't pick himself up he's gonna start sitting the bench permanently.

"do you guys want to go out tonight, maybe grab some drinks?" ben chilwell asks, slinging his gucci bag over his shoulder.

i open the locker room door, ready to get as far away from here as i can, "maybe, send me the address." pochettino gave us an after game talk about how disappointed he was in us, and it really didn't get me in the mood to go out for drinks.

i drive home quickly, not bothering to stop for autographs as i'm not really in the mood today. it's been really difficult on the team this season, and even though i'm only on loan, im giving everything i have to this team on and off the pitch, but it seems my best isn't good enough.

it seems as though the whole team except a couple have completely given up, and it breaks my heart to see the guys i've grown so close with, in this state.

i chuck my bag on the ground once i enter the dark house, letting out some of my pent up anger. i turn the corner, noticing the kitchen is dimly illuminated by a couple of candles scattered on the kitchen island.

i wonder for a moment how those got there until i see lylas head pop up from behind the coach, "oh joão, you're home!" she slips across the hardwood floor in a pair of fuzzy socks and comes crashing into my chest.

she's wearing one of my sweatshirts and a pair of grey sweat shorts, she looks absolutely adorable. she actually came to my game today, but i told her she could leave after the game ended, not wanting her to have to wait for the after game talk to conclude.

her arms wrap around my tall frame and i melt into her embrace, her touch immediately soothing my tense body. "i have to show you what i-" she starts but quickly notices the sour look on my face and hesitates. "what's wrong?"

i wave it off, not wanting to show her my weak side. "nothing i'm fine."

she scrunches her nose and a knowing look crosses her features. "joão tell me." she speaks softly.

my name rolls off her tongue as if it's her last words. the way she talks to me so genuine and sweetly makes me want to give my everything to her. i trust her with everything and i know that when my first tear falls from my eye, she won't judge me.

her face softens and she grabs my hand in hers, not needing me to explain anything. her free hand reaches up to wipe away the salty tear, her soft fingertips brushing over my cheek.

she leads me over to the couch and she lays down. i stand by her feet, waiting for her signal. after she gets comfortable she waves me over and i slowly lower myself on top of her, being careful not to constrict her airway.

i bury my face into the crook of her neck and close my eyes. her hand makes a way to my hair and she starts to twirl the strands between her delicate fingers.

"tell me what's wrong joão." she asks so quietly i have to do a double take to tell if she actually said it or not.

i look up at her and she's already peering down at me with a sad and understanding smile on her lips. the candlelight from the kitchen illuminates one half of her face in the dark room making her look angelic, and i can't help but admire how naturally beautiful she is.