Astania Reviews

Kae | House of Zale

TITLE: House of Zale

AUTHOR: @KalebZale

GENRE: Fantasy

CHAPTERS I'VE READ: Seven

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I read seven chapters as I felt like this was enough to properly get a handle on your story and my thoughts regarding it.

This review details my opinion. At the end of the day, this is your story, and you know it better than anyone. My opinion is merely that, and it is subjective. I perceived it a certain way and you do not have to agree, since it mostly comes down to my preferences.

Plot

The plot follows Kaleb, a Paladin whose main job involves doling out punishment and justice for his fellow Paladins. When he meets Iridia, a neophyte whose mentor was charged, he takes her under his wing and the two of them set out to defeat corruption.

I admit that I had to refer to the blurb to fully comprehend this plot. The setup makes sense, and I understood that Kaleb was a Paladin with a rather unfortunate job immediately. However, the plot and its specifics could be made a bit more clear, as while the story kicks into gear immediately, it left me a bit curious to gain some more context. For example, what exactly is a Paladin? Besides the council, who controls them, and for what purpose?

The adventure of Kaleb and Iridia is fun, comedic at times, and both characters are well-written; the only challenge with its plot is that at a certain point I began to wonder why Kaleb wishes to get rid of corruption. It's a very noble goal, one I can get behind, and the specifics of Paladins seeming to work in a gender-based society where they have servants (called helpers) and where Paladins are assumed to be male lends itself to this idea of a subterfuge against a higher power that would expose its misdeeds. Why though, does Kaleb want to support this cause? I get the sense he cares deeply about Iridia, and perhaps even sees her as a friend; his motivations though are a bit foggy.

I like how quickly the plot kicks off and that it seems to follow a streamlined format of a problem being introduced (corruption within a higher society), followed by a solution (Paladin Kaleb must expose it). The fact that Iridia joins him means I also understand instantly what his character arc will likely be: a grumpy guy forced to see the good in humanity after his job forced (and conditioned) him to see the bad side of it.

The fact that I can identify these things very early on is a good thing, since it clearly establishes the direction the plot is going and sets up my expectations for what will happen.

Characters

Kaleb: I like that his character has some growing to do. I can get behind that as a main character that he's grumpy, a bit mean spirited, and perhaps even a bit jaded from his work as he deals mostly with the 'bad' of humanity. I would like to know more about him as a character, such as what he likes, what he dislikes, his motivations and hobbies. These things were not immediately clear to me upon my reading, and while they may be explored in greater detail later on, I feel as though they should be given more time in early chapters. We want to establish as much as we can about a main character to make readers feel like they want to join him on his journey, so little details such as Iridia doing something that annoys him, or emotional ticks that would show us more about him, would help to better establish who he is as a person. I can see his arc very clearly and that is a great thing, as the story clarifies immediately to the reader that he's not well-liked by the public. These are great details that help set up what will become of him later on!