Astania Reviews

Kae | Sidelines

TITLE: Sidelines

AUTHOR: doodlemcfiddle

GENRE: Romance

CHAPTERS I'VE READ: Two

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This review details my opinion. At the end of the day, this is your story, and you know it better than anyone. My opinion is merely that, and it is subjective. I perceived it a certain way and you do not have to agree, since it mostly comes down to my preferences.

Plot + World

The plot follows Ethan, a bright college student who must tutor the football captain, Jackson. I found the use of the college setting relatable! I think it makes a lot of sense for a tutoring story to take place in college as opposed to YA (where I usually see this trope). Ethan's character seems reserved and smart, and the allusion to his past is great. I liked how the plot introduces Ethan and hints at his past first, before tying that into the tutoring thing. I think this story intends to be multiple POV, so that also gives you a lot of opportunities to contrast Jackson with Ethan.

The setting takes place on campus, and I liked the way the details were woven into the story, connecting to the characters and the narration. Ethan has a great voice that makes him fun to read—he's sarcastic, and I liked his narration. The world also really ties into the character too, so when the narration describes the weather, it also links to Ethan having decided to wear an outfit that doesn't fit with the cold outside. This way, you've introduced the concept that he possibly feels like he doesn't belong, and that he's new to this place, while also showing us that he might be academically smart, he might not be the best at situational intelligence, something I'd assume will also come up with the other POV character.

I enjoyed what I read from the two chapters currently available! I think your writing style is detailed and humorous in a subtle way that compliments Ethan's character well.

Characters

Ethan: From the first line of the first chapter, his character comes off as sweet, and his thoughts are detailed really well. The hints to what happened to him before the story starts are also really nicely woven into the storyline. I do want to know why he agrees to tutor Jackson so easily, but I imagine future chapters will get into that a bit more. His narration, I found, does a really cool thing where it personifies things: "human traffic," for example, and the descriptions of the coffee in the first chapter. I can't help but like him, especially when he talks to himself. I find it relatable and very realistic. Something that I think hinted as a possible character flaw of his is when he glances at the banner, then can't stop himself from looking at it again. It's hinting that maybe he's exactly over whatever happened to him in the past, and it provides an idea that he might be unable to hide his emotions too. Of course, these are just my speculations from an early point in the story, but I think it's great that I can pick up on these concepts: the fact that the story has got me thinking is great.

General Thoughts I Had While Reading

Chapter One:

I love your first line! It's cute. You manage to ignite curiosity within me as a reader, and set up the character's voice.

There's some great wording in your second paragraph! "Unofficial truce zone," and "caffeinated harmony," are both excellent.