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chapter seven short-lived
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Vidia tried her hardest to not be so obvious of her feelings towards Hazel. She pretty much avoided physical contact. But she didn't ignore her or anything, Vidia doesn't know what would happen if Hazel suddenly disappeared. Her day to day had gone from empty to full with the addition of her. Like their walk to the gymnasium after chemistry, it was something that never got old, they always had something to talk about even after a whole hour together.
As they entered the gym, it was clear that this session was going to be different than their previous ones. Josie and PJ instructed all of the members to sit on the ground in a circle. Vidia didn't question it, but as long as she got to sit next to Hazel, she didn't really mind. So, she got comfy, taking off her tattered backpack and propping it against her leg.
Josie started off today's session, "So, we know that the club has been a place where we can feel empowered physically, but we also thought it could be a safe space and a place where we can open up and talk about our feelings."
As Vidia looked around she could tell the girls agreed, small nods here and there. She thought it was nice for them change it up like that, bottling things up could either make or break a person, and she was practically an expert on the topic.
"Okay, so who's been raped?" PJ asks immediately after.
And there it is.
She threw her own hand up, seeing how most of the girls looked bewildered, "Just, you know, raise your hand. Gray area stuff counts too."
Vidia wasn't surprised to see all the girls' hands go up, but it didn't help the reluctancy she had to raise her own. She kind of had a silent vow to herself to never bring it up with anyone. Her mom never really paid attention to her, but that didn't stop the plethora of boyfriends she's had over the years.
Sylvie was the first to actually speak up, "Everybody knows the situation with my stepdad. He's just obsessed with Friday movie nights."
Vidia wasn't quite sure that this is what the girls expected them to bring up in the circle. If anything, she expected them to speak of some type of trauma, but Vidia wasn't going to demean Sylvie's issues.
"I mean, God, I get it, you're my new stepdad, but fuck, whatever." The desperation was clear in her voice, "You know?"
From beside her, Stella-Rebecca spoke, "Everytime I call the police about my stalker, they tell me to fill out an online form. And then the form tells me to call, so I call, and then they say they can't get involved until he tries to kill me. And he keeps saying he's going to, but that doesn't count. So, it's just, like, annoying."
"Been there."
Vidia couldn't ignore the voice in the back of her head telling her to speak up, her hands fidgeting with the thread on the end of her frayed jeans. There was so much to say, but she struggled to find what to talk about. Her mom, her band's recent neglect, the struggle of working and being a student for what felt like a lifetime, but the one thing that remained on the tip of her tongue was the night of the fair. It still haunted her, constantly replaying in her nightmares and anytime she found herself alone in a place that didn't conceal her in it's own four walls.
So, she took a deep breath in, sighing as she spoke in a simultaneously hushed tone but that everyone could hear, "Well, I know this club started because of the girls on the announcements who got hurt by a Huntington player."
Vidia couldn't help the shaking in her hands as they continued to fidget with her jeans, "But it wasn't just her that got attacked. The night of the fair, I was packing my stuff back in my car and a man pulled up on me. He hit me to the ground and just kept hitting me, and there was no one I could go to. But, this club has changed a lot of things for me, and I know that you girls will be here to listen."
From beside her, Hazel's hand reached out and grabbed her own. All of the fidgeting and shaking stopped, and all Vidia could feel was the warmth of Hazel's own hand spreading over her own. Sadly, it was short lived and Hazel's hand retreated back to her own lap and she recounted her own issues to the group.
"Well, ever since my parents' divorce, my mom has been doing this, like, midlife crisis." Hazel's eyes were distant, as if they were peering through her own brain and figuring out how she felt, "I don't know how that's really sitting with me, you know? It's been really, really dark. This has just been really meaningful to me to, like, get to know some new people who actually want to, like, get to know me."
Vidia allowed her hand to settle on Hazel's shoulder, their eyes meeting as Hazel's speech came to an end. It went unspoken that there was a certain amount of that statement directed towards her, and Vidia absolutely agreed.
However, it became short-lived yet again as PJ broke the silence of the rest of the group, "I just want to bring it back to Brittany for a second."
Vidia rolled her eyes, focusing back to Hazel and her sad eyes as they fell to the floor, whispering to her, "It's okay, I hear you."
The two tuned back into the group, hearing halfway through Josie's speech of her own, "...and that guilt probably will, like, shackle em forever. I realize now, I don't have to be that person anymore. Like, I don't have to just let things happen to me 'cause of you guys. And, um, I am, like, really grateful for what the club has become and, just especially, you know, form where we started and. Yeah, sorry, I feel like I kind of killed the vibe. I never really, I guess, said that to anyone before. Sorry. Do you wanna, like, wrap up, or?"
"I'm going through a divorce." Mr. G spoke up.
Vidia would be lying if she said she didn't jump a little at the deep voice and how it contrasted to the rest of the girls who spoke before. She had completely forgotten that he was there, but now it was completely transparent.
"That shit felt good to say. I tell y'all, men need therapy."
"I think that's a good place to maybe wrap up."
Vidia reacher for her backpack, getting an urge to speak to Hazel. However, as she turned to speak she saw her comforting Mr. G. God, is there anything this girl could do that wouldn't make her like her more?
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author's note !
hiiiii !! so sorry for the little hiatus, i was struggling so hard with the end of the semester but im back and determined to get as much done for this fic before the next semester starts :)
