Pursuit of Happiness | Taz Skylar [1]

051. te amo

The morning after Ivy's birthday, Zoe woke up well before sunrise, the only sound in her dark bedroom being Taz snoring softly. He was lying on his side and his arm was thrown across Zoe's waist. He looked so peaceful sleeping like that that Zoe didn't want to wake him, so she carefully slipped out from under his arm and left the bed. Holding her breath, Zoe looked back at Taz to make sure that she hadn't woken him up in leaving the bed. Taz mumbled something under his breath that sounded vaguely like Zoe's name and rolled over onto his stomach, but he otherwise didn't stir.

Relieved, Zoe carefully padded out of the bedroom and walked to the bathroom. Zoe shut the door slowly behind her, wincing as it clicked shut behind her, but she heard nothing on the other side of the door.

Sighing, Zoe rubbed at her cheeks as she moved through her tiny bathroom to reach her shower. After her moment of weakness in Nate's backyard, Zoe had managed to hold herself together until she had stepped back into the safety of her own home, which was when the tears had started again. Taz had held her while she cried, his arms locked around her tightly to keep her heart from breaking apart in her chest, until she had nothing left to cry and she had passed out from sheer exhaustion.

The sound of the shower turning on sounded almost too loud in the otherwise quiet apartment, but Zoe ignored it as she stripped off her shirt and underwear, kicking them into the corner. If Taz was sleeping that lightly that he was going to be woken by the sound of the shower being turned on through two sets of doors, then he was likely not far from waking up on his own.

The water was warm as Zoe stepped underneath the stream, closing her eyes and tipping her head back to let the water run over her tear-stained face. Zoe wasn't sure how long she stood there, just allowing the water to slide over her body, before she opened her eyes and bent down to retrieve the bottle of shampoo from the floor. Zoe flicked the bottle's lid open, but before she could deposit some shampoo into her hand, the sound of the bathroom door being opened and then shut again cut through the air. Sticking her head out of the shower, Zoe was greeted with the sight of a naked Taz discarding his underwear onto the pile in the corner that Zoe had created with her own discarded clothes.

"Do you want company?" Taz asked, approaching the shower. By means of answering, Zoe set down the shampoo and stepped back from the door of the shower to let Taz step inside with her. He pulled the shower door shut behind him and then turned back to her, taking her chin his hand so that he could lean down to press his lips to hers.

"Good morning," Zoe murmured against Taz's lips, resting her hand on his arm so that she could trace her fingers over the tattoos inked into his forearm. He hummed in response, twirling a lock of her hair around his finger as she said, "I'm sorry if I woke you up. I was trying to be quiet."

"You're okay," Taz answered, his hand sliding into the hair at the back of Zoe's neck to rub his fingers against the base of her skull. "How are you feeling?"

"We'll see," Zoe said, an uneasy laugh tumbling from her mouth. "Thank you. For going with me yesterday. It made it so much easier, having you there."

"I wasn't about to let you go alone," Taz told her, watching her eyes drift shut as he continued to rub his fingers against the back of her head. While her eyes were closed, Taz took the opportunity to drink in every line in Zoe's face, looking for any sign of the overflow of grief that he'd witnessed the night before. When he came up empty, Taz's hand left the back of Zoe's head, his fingers brushing her cheek as he pressed a kiss to the skin between Zoe's eyebrows.

Zoe hummed softly, the sound rumbling in the back of her throat, as she looked up at Taz. There was a tenderness to his expression as he looked at her, his hand on her cheek moving to brush her hair behind her ear. She had expected that she would have to convince him that she was truly alright, that the grief from the day before had shown her mercy and receded back into her mind, but when she looked at him, she realized that wasn't necessary. When she said she was okay, he believed her. He trusted her to know herself and her own grief enough to know when she was okay and when she wasn't.

Zoe's hand was still on Taz's arm as she stepped closer to him, standing directly under the stream of water so that it ran over her face and across her body. The water was running into her eyes, but she couldn't bring herself to care, not when she could feel something warm swelling in her chest. The feeling was so big that there shouldn't have been room for both the warmth and the pain that she carried around every day, but somehow there was room. The warmth didn't banish her pain and her pain didn't corrupt the warmth, the two things instead coexisting uneasily inside her.

If you love him, you should tell him.

Zoe's breath was trembling a little as she looked away from Taz's eyes, her gaze falling on his arm once more. Taz watched Zoe as she gathered her thoughts, her calloused fingers dancing across his skin until she reached the fish tattooed into his arm and began to trace her fingers over it, over and over and over again. The was something calming about the repetitiveness of it, slowing the frantic thumping of Zoe's heart against her ribcage, and she lifted her head again to look up at Taz.

"Te amo," Zoe said, whispering to hide the edge of uncertainty in her voice. It had been far too long since she'd spoken Spanish; it felt foreign and odd in her mouth now, forcing her to make movements with her tongue that she wasn't used to anymore.

Taz was staring at her, unsure if he'd heard her right over the sound of the shower and not wanting to push her in case he hadn't. "Say that again."

Zoe's eyes went wide. "Wh – Did I say it wrong?"

"You said it perfect. I just want to hear you say it again," Taz breathed, his eyes filled with wonder as he looked down at her. As he was speaking, Taz pressed a hand to Zoe's hip and walked forward, guiding them both out from under the stream of water so that he could see her without water in his face. Zoe was pliant under his hands, allowing him to lead her until she was trapped between Taz's body and the wall of the shower. The tiles were cold underneath Zoe's back, but she couldn't bring herself to care as she looked up at Taz, blinking water out of her eyes.

"Te amo," Zoe said again, her eyes fixed on Taz. He was grinning at her, so wide that it looked like it almost hurt, but then he surged forward and was kissing her, so hard that her head spun and all that she could do was hook her arm around his neck and kiss him back.

Taz's lips left Zoe's, but they didn't leave her skin, kissing across her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her chin. He was saying something after every kiss, but Zoe was still dizzy. It wasn't until Taz ducked his head to press kisses down her throat that she managed to hear that he was saying it back, breathing, "Te amo," repeatedly against every inch of her skin that he could reach.

Taz was moving lower, his mouth on her collarbone, but he stopped when Zoe tugged at his shoulders, letting her pull him up again. Zoe's entire back felt cold from the tiles, but she still couldn't bring herself to care, not when he was smoothing his hands across her cheeks to cradle her face between his hands.

"Te amo," Taz said, loud enough for Zoe to hear him properly this time, pressing his forehead against hers. Zoe was smiling up at him, so wide that there was no room for her pain, only her love for him. Taz kissed her then, using his hands on her face to pull her closer until he could slot his lips against hers.

"I love you," Taz breathed against Zoe's mouth in between kisses. Zoe sighed against his lips in response, slipping her tongue into his mouth. As Zoe explored his mouth, Taz's hands left her face, one pressing against the tiles next to Zoe's head while the other dragged down the side of her body until his fingertips were brushing the outside of her thigh. Zoe's kiss grew needy as she hooked her leg around Taz's hip, pressing her foot against his behind to drag him closer. Taz groaned Zoe's name as every inch of his body came to settle against every inch of hers, breaking the kiss so that he begin pressing kisses down her throat.

"I love you so much," Taz murmured, his voice muffled against Zoe's skin. She tried to answer, to say it back, but then he was sucking at the junction of her neck and shoulder and she couldn't do anything but tip her head back against the wall behind her and let out a breathy moan.