1.
nezha: how do you connect with another person's pet?
mk: what?
pigsy: what?
tang: what?
mei: *pulls up 500 slide presentation* im glad you asked
2.
mk: you really put everything aside and came all this way for me? how did you even get here so fast?
mei: several traffic violations
pigsy: three counts of resisting arrest
sandy: roughly a gallon of tea
tang: also, thats not our car
3.
sandy: i lost pigsy
mk: how did you LOSE pigsy?!
mei: to be fair, he is pretty small
4.
macaque: ill fucking kill you!
macaque: do you want that?
wukong: yeah, as long as i get to see you
5.
nezha: so, are you two.. dating now?
wukong & macaque: yes
nezha: why?
wukong: well, i happen to find macaque very appealing
nezha: yeah, i can sorta see where you're coming from, im trying to figure out whats wrong with macaque
6.
mk: if you water water, it grows
pigsy: what?
sandy: no, no, hes got a point
7.
pigsy: moon looks beautiful tonight, doesnt it?
tang, looking at pigsy: yeah. . . but do you know whats more beautiful?
pigsy and tang in unison: *sighs* chang'e
8.
wukong: why is it so hard for you to believe me?!
macaque: ...
wukong: ..oh, right. the lying
9.
azure: and then they ran into my sword. they ran into my sword ten times
mk: you mean you stabbed th--
azure: they ran. into my sword
10.
mk: *running towards red son with open arms*
red son: *moves out of the way*
mk: wh- hey! why'd you move?!
red son: i thought you were trying to attack me
mk: i was trying to hug you!
red son: why would you hug me?
mk: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU?!
11.
mei: nezha isnt answering my calls
wukong: allow me
mei: i tried 6 times, what makes you thi--
nezha: what the fuck did you do now
12.
mk, regarding macaque: his legs look really good in those jeans
wukong: you should see him without them ;)
mk:
mk: why would he take his legs off???
13.
mk: *sneezes outside flower fruit mountain's ancient temple during ep 0*
wukong, from inside: bless you
mk: god?!
