(Not) Just a dream (OR, the ICT steals a groom)

Heartstopper

Ishan had been in a lousy mood from morning, just like Shubman. The annoying headache that'd started at the back of his eyes yesterday night since he watched Monica and Chandler's proposal scene for an hour in loop after Shubman fell asleep was still persisting. He'd found it hard to smile for the pictures he'd had to pose for.

He knew it was worse for Shubman, who had to pose for a much greater number of pictures, and at times almost grimaced instead of smiling.

The lousiness, the drowsiness, the headache, everything had been irritating, but tolerable.

Till everyone was seated and waiting in anticipation, till it was time for the bride and groom to enter, till Shubman walked in in a pastel-blue sherwani and Ishan was hit with a train-wreck.

 ***

For it was at that moment, with everything inside him straining to explode, his head going light, and the surroundings dimming to him, when Shubman was the closest to going the farthest away from him, that Ishan had an unreal revelation:

He was in love with his best friend.

***

Dilip sir appeared near stage in a hurry, holding a sehra. "You forgot this, Shubi!" 

He tossed it to Shubman, who, used to accepting catches from him, caught it.

"I don't want to put this on," said Shubman disagreeably.

"You must," Dilip sir insisted firmly. "Mustn't he?" he asked Shahneel.

"Yeah," she said promptly. "I was saying it from the start, but he was being a spoilt brat like always."

Shubman put it on.

If Ishan had imagined Shubman's face being hidden from view would stop the painful racing of his heart, he was wrong.

Like a sehra could make him forget what he'd just realized.

Like he didn't know every inch of Shubman's face by heart already.

Like that face didn't appear in his dreams every night, hadn't appeared every night for years, and years...

Ishan's throat clenched.

And it didn't help that Yuzi started playing 'Channa Mereya' precisely at that point.

***

'Achha chalta hoon

Duaaon mein yaad rakhna

Mere zikr ka

Zubaan pe swaad rakhna'

How had he not realized before?

How had something so obvious, something so important, something so life-changing, escaped his notice all these years?

Ten years.

He'd had ten years with Shubman. 

He'd loved him ten years.

And he'd never known.

Or maybe he had known.

But he had never acknowledged it.

He had kept it locked away too long. 

Till it was too late. 

'Dil ke sandookon mein

Mere achchhe kaam rakhna

Chitthi taaron mein bhi