DANTE [] BOOK 1

Chapter Eight

The sound of the slap echoed in the room. When I registered what was going on the only thing I could do was be shocked. She'd slapped me. She'd fuckin' slapped me! All because I told her Sandile wasn't the right man for her.

"Naledi what the fuck!"

"You are one fucked up person you know that, don't you ever say shit like that about Sandile ever again."

"What?" I laughed, "You're gonna slap me, fight for your little boyfriend?"

"You're not even half the man Sandile is Dante."

"We talking about dick size or what ---," I held my dick in my hands through my trackpant, "Cause ain't nobody ever gave you dick like me baby."

"Get over yourself."

I moved forward, tried to grab her hand but she slapped mine away, "Leave me the fuck alone Dante."

"So what? Suddenly Sandile is in your life and it's like I don't fuckin' exist anymore? What? We're just fuck buddies? I fuckin' care about you Naledi. Isn't that obvious?"

"You care about me," she laughed but clearly she wasn't amused, "You care about me Dante? Tell me one thing you've done ever since you came back into my life that shows that you care, fuck, tell me one thing you've done ever since you've known me that shows that you bloody care!"

"I've always been there for you Naledi."

"Oh shut up! You weren't there after Luvuyo, you ---"

"Cause you fuckin' left!"

"Did you give me a reason not to?" her voice broke, "There was no reason for me to stay Dante. You killed someone. I lied for you. I've always been doing shit for you cause that's how it is right, I give and you fuckin' take! You've never gave me anything Dante."

"I killed Luvuyo for you!"

"You put me in that situation," tears I hadn't noticed were welling up fell from her eyes, seeing her look so broken suddenly broke me as well, "You asked me to have sex with Luvuyo for your own satisfaction. I did it for you Dante. All those sex tapes I agree to, all the sex, the pain, the bullshit of knowing that behind closed doors you're a sex addict that gets hard from secretly watching other people fuck, you think that's you caring for me, you think that makes me happy, are you fuckin' crazy Dante?"

I was speechless for a second. I was hurting. I was broken and I was mad. She couldn't be right. I cared about her, I cared about her so much and it was messed up that she thought I didn't.

"Sandile loves me," she continued, "I'm not just a sex thing to him Dante I ---"

"You're not that to me either, Naledi I love you."

"Then you have a funny way of showing it."

I looked at her, stared at her, took every part of her in, was she crazy? After all these years she had the guts to tell me I didn't love her. If that's what she thought all along then why the hell did she spend all those years with me? Why the hell had she been having sex with me for these last couple of weeks?

"Naledi I know what happened with Luvuyo was wrong."

"Don't lie, that's not what you think."

"Let me finish," I said, my own eyes becoming teary, "I'm not perfect. I'm toxic and as much as I would never admit it, I'm not a good person to be with. But, I really do love you. I love sex yes, and I know it's all that we ever do but I feel like it's the only way I can prove to you how much you mean to me. I'm bad at this love thing ---," I broke down, for the first time ever infront of her, surprising both myself and her, "I don't know any other way to love you Naledi but I do know how much it fuckin' hurts to lose you. Knowing that you feel like Sandile is better man compared to me hurts. If I wasn't loving you right then why didn't you teach me how to? I can't let you go, ever. So fuck Sandile, hell, fuck you for even comparing me to him. Teach me how to love you Naledi, I swear I will never love you in any other way after that."

"Love can't be taught Dante."

"No, fuck, you're not hearing me."

She sniffled, hurriedly wiping off her tears, "It doesn't matter whether I understand you or not cause I'm done Dante. I can't be with Sandile and do what I do with you."

"Then be with me and leave Sandile!" it came out as a shout. She was tearing me apart. For the first time she was breaking my heart, for the first time I was getting my heart broken and I hated it.

"I can't Dante, I can't okay! Just please understand me!"

I moved forward and held her by the waist, pulling her to me. She tried to pull away but I pulled her closer, causing her to push with all her might, slapping me and crying her eyes out. I couldn't let her go, I wanted her to listen to me.

"Naledi please."

"No, leave me the fuck alone, please."

"Listen to me!"

She stopped, the only sound coming from her mouth was quiet sobs.

"I'm sorry Naledi okay, I'm sorry, I need you, I ---"

"If you love me, let go of me right now."

"Naledi ---"

"Get your fuckin' hands of me Dante."

I let her go. She wiped away her tears again and looked at me with pain in her eyes, "Don't call me, don't text me, don't even think about me, move on Dante cause trust me that's what I'm going to do."

With that she turned her back on me and made her way out of the house, slamming the door behind her. My pain turned to anger in an instant and I took the nearest thing I could find, which was a flower vase and slammed it on the wall.

"Fuck you Naledi!" I screamed at the top of my voice, "Fuck you!"

The anger was overcame by hurt again and before I knew it I was crying. I fell to the floor, weak to my knees, crying my eyes out. It hurt, it hurt so bad I felt like someone was crushing my heart and I couldn't do anything about it except to just cry it out. I couldn't let her do this to me. I couldn't let Sandile have her. Just the day before I had been so sure that I was going to do everything I could to have her. Was the sex so good that it made her wake up the next day to break up with me? I was mad and hurt so in that moment, as I cried, I decided the only way Naledi and I could be together for eternity was to eliminate Sandile. If he wasn't there then I would have Naledi back. Sandile was no longer gonna be there, I was going to make sure of it.