One Last Lust

CHAPTER FOUR

J U N G K O O K

Y/N was right, and now I see it. Every dirty word that came out of her mouth is happening. From the time I left her house several days ago until now, she's all that fills my thoughts. I'm numbing myself with alcohol to try and stop replaying every forbidden act that happened between us in her house. Whiskey doesn't help; sleep doesn't come easily. And when I'm about to close my eyes, her face is what I see. To be brutally honest, when I fucked my girlfriend, Sia, it was Y/N's face that I imagined. And now, I've lost track of all the times I've suffered wanting her.

The most delicious dirty deed we had is still fresh in my mind. Y/N knows how to satisfy me in a way my girlfriend never could. But, I try to convince myself that maybe I'm just adjusting to being with Sia, to the relationship, the emotional connection and especially the sex.

But no matter how hard I try to adapt, nothing comes close to the way Y/N makes me feel. I must admit, I feel like a pervert for thinking about another woman while being in a committed relationship. I've allowed her to get into my head, and now she fucking stay in my brain.

I've been gnawing on the TV remote, staring at some movie for over an hour. I can't even understand what it's about. I'm sexually day dreaming about Y/N and God, please help me. I desperately want to feel her. Touch her. Up and down on her. Especially in and out of her. As if one more orgasm is the only way to make me feel better.

But I don't want to be selfish. If Y/N will agree to go out with that guy or whoever she wants, there's even less reason for me to bother her. She deserves to be happy. After all, I put myself in this spot. I was too cowardly to confess my feelings for her and downright foolish for getting involved with another woman just to forget her.

My thoughts were interrupted when Sia straddled my lap, kissing me goodbye. "Babe, I'll miss you," she said as she took my hand and forcefully guided it onto her tight ass. "I hope you can come with me to Budapest," she added.

I try my best to give her a genuine smile. "I hope so too, baby." I manage to say, though my mouth betrays me. "I-I m-mean, babe." Then I shut my eyes for being stupid calling her the terms of endearment me and Y/N had.

Annoyed, Sia gets up and off from being seated on my lap. She's fully aware of my past relationship with Y/N, but we've never really discussed it. The only time her name came up was during an argument, when Sia caught me searching for Y/N's account on social media.

"So, we're baby now? Since when do we call each other that?" she smirked, reaching for the Chapstick lip balm on the center table. She open the cover and put it on her plum lips, then toss the cap at my face.

"No, babe. It's just that --" I struggle to find the right words, knowing that I'm clearly lying and caught off guard.

"You can't even speak now?" she exclaim, quickly gathering her two bags from the floor. "Nevermind. I have to go. The taxi is here."

"I'm sorry. Are you sure you don't want me to drop you to the airport, babe?" I ask, hoping to ease the tension. But she shake her head, and lean to kiss me, tasting the cherry flavored lip balm on her lips. "You have a dinner party with your friends later. It's okay. Just promise me one thing."

"What is it?"

"I know Y/N will be there. I expect you to behave."