Little Sprout 🌱 A SandLongtae Story.

Chapter 10: No Goodbyes, Just See You Again (Part2)

SAND

"Sand, I think it's time for you to hear my story too. Do you want to? Or should we just hit pause for now and maybe talk some other time? It might be too much to deal with all in the same day" Longtae smiled at me.

"Tell me," I urged. Finally feeling lighter than I had been for the longest time. Finally talked about my past and I have no more secrets from Tae.

Tae laid down on the blanket and looked up to the trees and whatever part of the sky he could see that had not been obscured by the abundant leaves, he told me as he raised his hand again to play with the lights that had managed to make it through the dense forest leaves.

"I told you I got my heart broken because P'Ton cheated on me. That wasn't everything. I just never thought I had to tell anyone about this ever"  Longtae sighed. "I met P'Ton through my work. He was a senior. We bonded over our shared interests in photography and I learned so much from his experiences. He had successfully won me over after a while of wooing me as I was hesitant to enter any kind of relationship especially with someone who was so different from me. But he was wonderful and kind to me and was a talented photographer whom I admired so much. I gave in and a year later, he wanted to live together. Once again, I gave in to his convincing. That's when things started to change. He started to pay less and less attention to me and our relationship. The things we used to do together, he no longer wants to do and is often telling me he is tired. But he has all the time and energy to go out with his friends. The responsibility of housework fell on me solely, I was like a hired housekeeper making sure his house is in order, his clothes are washed and he has food on the table. I didn't mind. I like doing these things, as you know me. I like helping as much as I can. But the arguments had become more regular, I'd ask him to be less touchy to his friends, especially when I could see them, because I also worked as his assistant sometimes. The first time I called him out on this behavior, that was the first time he slapped me. I was shocked to my core. My father had always been firm to me but gentle, he had never laid his hands on me. P'Ton immediately apologized to me and told me not to trigger him with senseless accusations. I forgave him thinking it was a one time thing and he was just too angry with my accusations. But the late nights and the flirty behavior had continued, spilling all over his social media account, which never had a picture of me. I was like a secret lover. When I started to question him, he hit me again. Again he was sorry right after and I stupidly forgave him once again. Until it happened more often that I had learned to keep my mouth shut and endure in silence because that way I don't get hurt, at least not physically. I started paying more for things that we use to share, like the groceries, sometimes the bills. I didn't mind though, I had work and he was still coming home to me. I convinced myself, things will get better for us. I just have to be patient and love him as much as I can. I thought that the kindness and unconditional love I have for him will manage to change him. But I was physically and emotionally battered by the time our relationship ended.  Our 3 year relationship ended with me trying to find him in the club he loved going to, to celebrate our anniversary and instead I found him in the side alley with his body parts on somebody else. I packed my bag and left in the middle of the night too scared what the consequences would be if he found me before I had escaped and we did not even say goodbye. It just ended, like that. I stayed with a friend for a few months to sort out my work and make sure I left with everything in order, but I never went out anywhere without someone with me, too scared P'Ton would come for me. I had disposed of my old number and asked my boss at work not to be assigned to work with him. Afterwards, I came here, not sure what I wanted to do anymore. I was scared and wounded for life, for loving and trusting." Tears streamed down on the side of Tae's face. "This is the first time I am re-visiting the life I wanted so badly to leave behind, to forget. Realizing how stupid I was for letting a man trample my dignity and self worth. I cried for the innocence I had freely given to a man who didn't deserve it and I cried for the first love, that usually evokes wonderful stories for most people but mine had been a nightmare I wished to erase forever. Am I not deserving to be loved? To be taken care of? To be appreciated for just being me? I thought I had finally found someone who could give it back to me. I was devastated, lost my faith in myself and in true love."