Dumped!

Dumped (28)

PICTURE OF SOPHIE HARRINGTON ----------------------------------------------------->>>>>>>

28

“Stacey, I’m going to cut out early, okay?” I said, locking up my office door.

She was filing letters at her desk, as I walked over. It wasn’t exactly substantial work, but at least she’d stashed away her magazines.

She looked up, “Oh. Are you okay?” she asked.

Okay. What exactly does the word even mean?

 I’d done a completely terrible thing, only a few days back – my confrontation with my mom – and I was still trying to wrap my head around the things I’d said. I felt like my head was finally clear, which felt good, but as horrible as she could be, she was still my mother – no matter what I’d said – and she didn’t deserve that much cruelty. I knew I needed to take it back, but the dishonor I felt was too great; what exactly would I even say to her?

I definitely wasn’t okay.

“I’m great”, I lied to Stacey, with a forced smile.

My office seemed too small for all the thoughts in my head, and it was stifling. I really needed to be out in all the bustle of the city, with pedestrians to distract me from my conflicting emotions and thoughts.

“Okay. Call me later, okay?” she said, cheerily. That was one of the times I appreciated Stacey’s obliviousness or rather, inability to read emotions; to her, ‘okay’ always meant ‘okay’, even if there were tears streaming down your face – okay, maybe not quite that extreme, but still.

I got into the elevator and pressed L, for the lobby. I’d carpooled with some of my co-workers that morning, so I didn’t have my car. It was okay, though; walking seemed more appealing anyway.

The elevator stopped on the third floor and in walked Jeremy and Brad, chuckling lightly.

“Hey Deana”, Brad said first, noticing my presence after he’d gotten over whatever was funny, in the first place.

“Hi”, Jeremy said, giving me a quick smile, which I returned. With our covert relationship, he was no longer playing the part of the mean, unfeeling boss; he was now just my boss. At least, to everyone except us.

“Hi”, I said, as the elevator set into motion again.

“Going somewhere?” Brad asked, cocking an eyebrow, as he leaned against the guardrails, facing me.

“I have to go get some stuff done”, I answered. The way my lies were beginning to come so fast, without even a second of thought, was starting to frighten me a little.

“Stuff, huh? Not vague at all”, he replied, rolling his eyes at me.

“Fine. Girl stuff”, I said, causing him to scrunch up his face.

“Ugh! Deana, details!” he said.

Jeremy chuckled and shook his head. “You asked.”

It was weird how bad I needed to touch him, or hold him every time I saw him; like a confirmation that he was real or something. The fact that he was only a few feet away made my longing even worse.

The button for the second floor illuminated and Brad said, “This is me. Jer, I’ll kill you if my car comes back with a single scratch. Deana, have fun with your . . stuff”, he said, stepping out.