Paint you Wings (Destiel)

Chapter 6

Even with Cas being always by his side Dean had his bad days. When those days happened, he fell back into his old routine of not talking at all, staying in bed all day, staring at the ceiling. He sometimes even thought of suicide, let the bad thoughts just take over. Nobody could get through to him or make him come out. When he felt better again though, he felt bad for causing Castiel and Sam to worry, who should he be kidding, he had no other friends, and apologized around a thousand times until they threatened him, so he would shut up.

Today seemed to be another one of those days. Dean didn't come down to breakfast, had locked his door and didn't react to Sam knocking and almost freaking out. The younger kid instantly searched Cas to get his help and, it was a miracle, Dean had let the black haired boy in.

Castiel instantly worried about his friend, the sickly pale skin didn't look too good and the bags under the blonde's eyes. Additionally Dean did wear a longsleeved sweater again – something he hadn't worn in a few weeks. Cas opened his arms, wanted to hug his friend but the latter shied away and looked at him like he had done something terrible.

Dean tried to stay away from Cas, far enough so the other wouldn't be able to touch him but in the end the other got a hold of him – and shoved the sleeves of his sweater up his arms. Dean instantly looked away, ashamed of what he had done to himself again, even though he promised Castiel he wouldn't harm himself in any way ever again.

The black haired on the other hand felt like he had failed as a friend – he hadn't even been able to prevent such an attack. Of course, he couldn't have done anything to stop Dean from doing what he had done, especially not since the other had locked himself inside his room, but he should have done something.

"Oh, Dean, what have you done to yourself?" Castiel asked sadly and let his fingers wander lightly over the fresh scars. He was irritated by the lack of reaction Dean was showing but decided to just try and take the other's mind off of the awful things for a little while. He thought of something and then smiled as he remembered something.

"Would you want to go outside? I mean to town? There is a new diner and I wanted to try the burgers, they say they're really good. And we could go to a few shops, I need a few things anyways." He said happily and looked at Dean who just shook his head. Cas just sighed and sat down on the bed, combing his hands through Dean's hair.

The blonde sighed softly at the contact, instantly feeling guilty of making his only friend feel bad. He hated how he wasn't even able to make his friend happy and how the only thing he was able to do was making the people who liked him hate him. He only worried the ones who loved him. And even though he didn't knew much about friendship and that kind of stuff he knew that definitely wasn't part of being a good friend.

"Would you mind if I took Sam with me then? I believe he would love to get outside but he's too young to go alone and our foster parents would only allow it if someone went with him that knows the city and stuff anyways," Cas tried again. He wanted to get to know the younger Winchester better and that way he could ask Sam a few question about his older brother.

As an answer (A/N: Alliteration, check. My teachers would be proud of me :3) Cas only got a nod but that was enough for him. He knew that Dean only wanted the best for the younger brother, that he would give up anything. But since Dean was too afraid to go outside to the city because there were too many people that would only stare at him he couldn't fulfil that wish.

But thankfully he had Cas now. The black haired would go out with Sam, would be able to give Sam something Dean couldn't. Of course, Dean was rather hesitant that Sam wouldn't need him in the future but both of them, Sam and Castiel, made it pretty obvious that nothing would harm the bond that was between the Winchester brothers – not even Dean's fear of crowds.