Learning to Live

Chapter 38

Thalia was an amazing cook. The spread on the table was mouthwatering. 

My favorite was an African dish; a spicy vegetable relish called Chakalaka. Which Stella did a cute little dance for, wiggling her shoulders, every time someone said the name. That kid was a bundle of joy.

Stella was sad to see us go, but her eyelids were already drooping as her Dad carried her upstairs to her room, followed by Brando. Stevie and Brownie were already settled in the car.

"Thank you for having me, Thalia. The food was amazing," I said, standing at the front porch with her and Hunter.

"I hope it won't be a one time thing," she said. Turning to Hunter, she gave him a hug and pushed him slightly. "Go."

He raised his brows but went to the car, giving us some privacy. Thalia held my hand and squeezed. "I'm sorry if I said too much earlier. I know I can be a bit nosy. Okay, very nosy."

I chuckled. "No, it's okay. I... needed that talk, I think."

"I have no right to tell you how to live your life, and if you and Hunter stay friends, or even if you no longer want to see his ugly mug, you're welcome here anytime."

My heart warmed. "Thank you. For everything."

"Okay. You don't mind if I get your number from Hunter, do you?" She asked.

"That would be lovely."

Her smile was relieved. And after she gave me a warm hug, I joined Hunter in the car.

The silence was stifling. The only sounds were Stevie and Brownie's playful growls as they wrestled in the back.

I turned the car into the main road, and a ray of sunshine caught Hunter's bracelet.

"Why didn't you tell Hunter?"

Thalia's question rang in my ears. Why didn't I tell Hunter about my cancer?

Every answer that came to mind sounded like a silly excuse. Jason was right. I was a coward.

Still, I didn't know if this was a conversation I wanted to have now. My brain hurt, and the thought of speaking about it again made my guts knot and squeezed my lungs. I breathed through it, focusing on my senses. The smell of Hunter and the seats' leather, the feel of the steering wheel under my hands, the soft rev of the car engine.

As if sensing my somber mood, Hunter left me to my thoughts until we rolled down my street.

"You're going to the gym today?" he asked.

"Not sure," I mumbled. Looking for a parking spot nearby. "I have to make a few phone calls and catch up on some reading."

"I'll see you later, then."

I didn't find a spot, so I just looked in the rearview mirror. Coast was clear. I stopped the car and turned on all the blinkers. We got out and met in front of the car.

"I'll see you later," I told him.

He opened his mouth. Someone honked. Hunter sighed. "Later."

I hopped on the sidewalk and watched him drive off. Tucking my hands in my pockets, I looked skyward. It was so blue, so beautifully blue. The sense of bereftness hit me harder than ever before.

I got into my building, taking the stairs instead of the elevator, and made the phone call.

Emma picked up at the fifth ring, sounding breathless. "Sapph! It's been so long!"

Guilt nipped me. I kept the distance on purpose. "Hey, Em. You have some time to talk?"

"I always have time for you, girly," she said. There was a deep voice in the background. "Brandon says hi."