Across The Paper

Part 15: Shatter Me Completely

The door opened at an unbearably slow speed, only making my heart beat faster as the blonde hues of hair appeared in my sight.

Gahyeon was fast. She found Siyeon in no matter of time, but I doubt now that this was a good idea.

I breathed in harshly, but Siyeon moved carefully, walking inside the room and closing the door behind her as slowly as before.

Her eyes looked blurred with confusion and I felt a pang of ache in my chest.

None of us uttered a word, though, and Siyeon stepped in front, taking my arm carefully in her hand, her bare forearms noticeably strained. I tried to retreat, but she didn't let go, only changing our places and trapping me in between her and the door so I wouldn't run away just like before.

She said, "You are avoiding me."

I had to close my mouth to swallow, not being able to move under her strong gaze. I held onto the doorknob like a shield as she stared me down with her gaze, and...

"Yes," I admitted, not so simply.

She frowned, staring. "Why?"

I did not answer. I couldn't. And her expression grew more wary.

"Bora..." She whispered my name in the sweetest of ways, wrecking my heart before mending it completely. She tore her eyes away, looking down. "You're having regrets."

Her voice was shallow, and my heart shattered once again. "What? Siyeon, no, I'm not regretting anything."

"You must be," She mumbled, still not meeting my eyes. "You're regretting what happened last night, hoping it never happened in the first place, because if not so then why would you-"

"Siyeon," I took her hands in mine, tightening my hold around them to make her look at me, to make her stop this nonsense. "I don't regret it. I promise." I whispered, leaning my forehead on hers. "How can I?"

Siyeon's expression seemed to soften, because she held my hands back, releasing a sigh while closing her eyes, her shoulders looking more relaxed. "Then... why?"

I held her cheek, making her open her eyes and all I knew was that I couldn't help but pull her in for a deep kiss.

I could feel her stiffen in my arms only to relax in just a few seconds, both of us taken by surprise by my action but every thought disappeared once I felt a cool hand touch my cheek, Siyeon kissing me back.

And no, it wasn't as soft and careful as yesterday, it was faster, felt more desperate, and I wanted to think, but at the same time that was the last thing in the world I wanted to do when I was feeling Siyeon's body clung on mine, pushing me against the door as her mouth lingered on mine, dwelling our lips together with harsh breaths in between.

We look at each other, through the kiss, for a heartbeat. Another. There was a hot swooping sensation in my stomach, and I felt that the ground might given way beneath me - but it didn't. Have I got a fever, I thought weakly, as a tiny, shy smile flickered on Siyeon's lips - one that I felt with my own. Am I going mad? I thought. I did not understand the way I felt, but I knew her lips had an answer.

I was actually thankful for the door, because if it wasn't there I might have melted into the floor. But we both reduced to this trembling mess of our lips gliding against each other, and I felt so dizzy once she pulled back, chest heavy with breaths, her gaze tearing from my lips to my eyes with struggle.

"I knew I wouldn't be able to stop myself from doing this when I saw you," I bit my bottom lip, overwhelmed emotions filling my guts. "And doing that in front of everyone else..." I spoke breathlessly, still holding onto her arms, clawed at her shirt as if I needed something to keep me anchored.