sleep was playing hard to get for shubman. he stares up at the ceiling, then at the outlines of the skyscrapers on the blinds, then he tosses and turns in bed.
“stop moving, i can’t sleep,” ishan says drowsily.
shubman sneaks a glance at him. his eyes are closed, lying on his side to face shubman.
he recalls the revelation rachin made earlier.
“oh christ, did i just- oh my god, im sorry for dropping the bomb on you like that, mate. i thought you knew.”
“rachin…i'm gonna need a moment.”
“yeah, i- alright, mate, let’s just pretend i never said anything.”
“this is a little overwhelming.”
“man, i feel bad. let’s not talk about this.”
“yeah.”
shubman is fighting the urge to confront ishan head-on about it but he can’t find the right words.
“rachin was saying something,” he speaks.
“yeah, tell me tomorrow,” ishan says, yawning.
shubman purses his lips, hesitation lingering on his tongue. “he said you’re…you’re bisexual?”
ishan’s eyes spring open. “he said that?”
shubman keeps his eyes on the ceiling. “it’s not true, right? he was joking?”
ishan exhales deeply. “do you wish he was?”
“just answer me, ishan.” shubman fiddles with his thumbs uneasily.
ishan turns to look at the ceiling as well.
“it’s true,” he says softly.
shubman clenches his jaw, a cold feeling crawling up on him. “you’ve got to be kidding me.”
ishan frowns. “why do you sound mad?”
“because i am.”
ishan turns to him. “what for?”
shubman glares at the darkness of the room, looking anywhere but at ishan.
“i don’t know. i don’t like this.”
“what? stop being so vague.”
shubman finally meets his gaze. ishan’s eyes are faintly visible under the moonlight slipping through the gaps of the blinds.
“i feel like you’re so….different all of a sudden. like a stranger. this doesn’t feel right.”
ishan shoots him an incredulous look. “unbelievable,” he whispers, heaviness settling on his shoulders. he sits up straight, staring down at shubman.
“you decide to ruin my sleep to be an insensitive jerk?”
shubman moves up to lean on the headboard. “can’t you see from my perspective?”
ishan scoffs. “and what’s your perspective? homophobia?”
shubman runs his fingers through his hair in growing discomfort. “look, i just got told that my best friend whom i’ve known for years, is into men by someone i barely know.”
“just because you barely know him doesn’t mean i do too. i have friends other than you, shubman.”
shubman’s sad eyes hold ishan’s gaze. “you say im your best friend.”
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it's okay if it's you | ishman ✓
Fanfiction"how to deal with an accidental drunk kiss with your best friend?" "talk it out like mature adults and move on." "instructions unclear. i kissed him again." [shubman gill x ishan kishan - indian cricket team rpf]
