it's okay if it's you | ishman ✓

CH: 19

⚠️ author’s note:
i hope none of you have missed ch: 18 (initially posted as ch: 17.5) because that’s really important to the story. check out the last chp once just in case (it was ishan’s pov after the confession).

—x—

shubman regrets crying to sleep because his eyes sting like a bitch in the morning practice. he has to blink at an abnormal rate to retain the moisture in them. not that it’s the only reason for his divided focus.

“are my aims bad or are you high?” siraj asks, raising an eyebrow.

shubman lets out an exasperated grunt. “sorry, give me a five.”

siraj nods, coming in closer to sit beside him. “wait, why do your eyes actually look red though?”

hearing, virat turns his head over from the sidelines with a gasp. “shubi, tu pitega aaj merese. tu ruk beta.”

shubman shakes his head briskly. rohit gives them a defeated look, saying, “ye sab mat kiya kar yaar match ke pehle.”

“ye sab mat kiya kar. period,” virat rephrases, sending a glare to rohit.

shubman whines. “i just didn’t get enough sleep, alright?

ishan looks at the scene unfolding with a guilty expression, which siraj notices. he waves him over to join them.

now, it’s not like shubman has been avoiding ishan all morning. mostly because there wasn't any need to since ishan left the room before shubman woke up.

“did he stay up watching movies again?” virat asks, looking at ishan.

“um, i turned in pretty early so i wouldn’t know,” he replies, rubbing his neck.

shubman scoffs. “hope you had the best sleep of your life,” he mumbles to himself.

rohit sighs, patting his back. “you should go ahead and freshen up for breakfast.”

shubman nods, picking up his gloves as his eyes meet with ishan’s. his agitated gaze probably comes off as a glare, to which ishan darts away his eyes quickly.

ishan glances at his retreating back as he walks off. ‘should have held the eye contact,’ he chides himself.

shubman gnashes at his bread angrily. he decided to eat in his room to avoid having awkward encounters with ishan.

“ignored me, didn’t he? chutiya sala,” he grumbles to himself, fussing over ishan’s attempt at being distant.

as if the cold empty bed he woke up to wasn’t enough of a disappointment. the heartbreak was still very fresh but his pounding head and burning eyes were the only reasons he didn’t start tearing up again.

shubman scowls at the brooding, desaturated blues of the room. he can’t even change roommates, that would just raise questions from everyone (and he’ll miss ishan).

“sowwy shubi!” he mocks in a weirdly pitched voice to the quiet room. “i love you sho sho much, but not like that, oops. can we still be the bestest best friends forever? awwww. lauda mera.”

“i do not sound like that.”

shubman glances at the intruder, cursing quietly to himself as his cheeks warm up in embarrassment.

“can’t you leave me alone?” he says, changing the subject immediately.

‘how dare you leave me alone?’ his brain rephrases.