If You Never Left

Chapter 8 : Cupcakes

***

"Thanks" I said after I take a bite of the chocolate filled cupcakes with over icing and I don't regret having it because my love for cream is for eternity.

Also speaking for my gratitude for this lovely cupcake is not just because Austin deserves this gratitude. He does. But also, because I can't deny the fact these are the best cupcakes I ever had after I left my town for college. Delicious.

"Roses like Cake", a small bakery in my town is still on top and sometimes I wonder to visit it back again.

"Pardon?" Austin asks as if he didn't hear me clearly, he pretends or he wants to add a flavour of sarcasm with his cupcakes maybe because he thinks I am an ungrateful person.

Maybe. But to the contrary I am not.

"Thanks for the cupcakes. They are actually delicious." I say it again.

These cupcakes distract me for carrying any further fight. He nods and takes a bite for the cupcake and keeps up a deadpan.

Nothing comes out of him. No sound of "mm","hmm" or "okay", which I predicted might come out. But nothing and now I wonder does he possess taste buds? Or did he donated that long time ago to someone and took the ability to not to show even a slight change of expressions to indicate at least something.

"I didn't know you are a businessman who makes cupcakes." I added trying to shrug off of the silence between us.

Also adding a truth to my words because in actuality I never thought a combination of Austin as businessman with his cold expressions will be with a cupcake who radiates happiness, warmth, love and joy.

"I could do many things that you haven't imagined Alessia." He said while looking at me and taking the bite of the cupcake.

My heart does that tingle near my skin. Again. I did not return any response and looked at him. Trying to figure out my reply. Trying to figure out to continue the conversation.

"I can cook other things as well, I mean", he clarified and his lips twitched up. Is he flirting with me? Perhaps not. He is just clarifying his words. Its me who is taking his words out of context. Its me.

"Oh I say. You learned it from somewhere...and why?" I asked him not to just continue the conversation but also because I am actually curious to know.

There are hundreds of more questions to ask for now related to his entry in this very bakery as well.

"My Mom" he said. Then he paused for a few seconds chewing his piece of cake and continued, "My Mom says cooking is a life skill it must not be related to stereotyping it to one gender so don't be shocked on it." He stated it as a matter of fact.

I am not shocked I said because I am not, Men can cook. It was just different when Austin did it so. For me, maybe.

"I already respect your mom for teaching you that, 21st century is what we are in and still cooking is a girls arena." I huffed, rolling my eyes.

For both the taste for this cupcake as I could taste the chocolate in my mouth and the very reality of the world. He nodded paying his complete attention on his bite.

"What about you?" He continues as he licks the cream off his thumb. Left thumb to be precise.

"My Mom?" I asked. He nods.

"My mom was busy in her life. Work. So it became a necessity to learn to cooking anyways." I felt my speech can stop anytime.

How helpless I become while talking about my feelings, the way how early I had to take up the responsibility, how my life although went through exactly as I planned it yet it somehow keeps me blank, awaited, empty is something I hate it myself yet I can't seem to find any other easy way than to switch the topic and talk about something which does not require to brainstorm my life. Me or my mind in particular.

Austin clenched his jaw. He immediately gets up and says his part is done and he would wait for me in the car while I finish but he just walks away. Just like that.

He must be offended by my immediate shut down I suppose. But a query struck my mind and I immediately stand up as he walks.

"What about the bakery or lock?" I ask.

"I already called the owner. He is my friend. Its not your part of worry." He says. His voice is in a normal pitch but I can feel some grudges taken. For me.

He tried to open up. I thought to myself as I finish my last piece. He tried to make this moment something. I shut him off, his efforts by my immediate shut down.

I can't seem to do anything about it. As of now. Nothing.

***

"Can I... can I ask you one thing?" I bite my lip as he concentrates on the steering wheel.

His eyes could kill the any passerby who comes across his eye contact with Austin. He hushed a soft "yeah".

"Why?" I shake my head in my inability to comprehend his intention of baking me cupcake.

Why to make such a gesture. Such gestures are not made to strangers just like that.

In my past broken friendships and failed relationships. I can quite say people don't make such sweet gestures to anyone.

"Pardon again-what?" He said, as if he heard something wrong.

I can't seem to less focus on his pardon instead of sorry of a way of asking the person to repeat. He doesn't even use that word - SORRY for that.

"Why did you do this...this baking thing for me?" I say as I use my hands as a gesture to ask the reason.

He just frowns trying to figure out what exactly I am supposed to ask. He's finding it exceptionally hard for him to understand.

I add to make it easy for him, "Like is it really difficult for you to say sorry?", I paused contemplating myself to continue further to not.

I finally add, "that you had to through lengths to fulfil your ego." And I immediately regret as those words come out of my mouth. they sounded so wrong and rude on the top.

I wanted to add my apology but he immediately stops the car. I say immediately say, "Austin I am not being ungrateful, I am really happy, I am So- "

He sighs and cuts me off and says, "It was a way to apologise Alessia, you asked for cupcakes and I gave you."

He says as if its not a big deal to make cupcakes to someone who you don't even know properly. Who you just met 24 hours ago and...Kissed. A voice said in my head.

Alright I took a deep breath. I turned my body to look straight to the windshield and glanced sideways and said, "So, you did this not to satisfy your ego?" And I immediately shut my eyes off. I don't even want to look at him. I shouldnt have asked him this the silence hits me as a minute pass.

As I turn myself to see Austin staring at me. He moves forward to me which made immediately made me move back and as he places his right arm on my seats top and the left one resting on the steering wheel.

"I am a man of promises Alessia, I promised to give you cupcakes, I kept it." His gaze is strong and hard.

"So, you did this for me? Really as in me as Alessia me?" My voice came out soft. It's not about Austin.

It's about convincing myself that a gesture is done for me. To me. It's an exception moment when I am not the giver but the taker.

"Alessia, do you want me to go on my knees and tell you that I baked cupcakes for you and not for my ego?" his voice becomes soft and I can feel some heat passing through his cheek as he gazes on my lips.

"Would that be enough to convince Your Mind that things could be done." He looks at me, meeting my eyes, "For You".

He licks his bottom lips and shuts his eyes off and turn his head and returns to his position. Both his hands on steering wheel and starts the car.

I am left processing and I might believe, Austin Stafford is also capable of reading minds.

***

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