Mermaid's Cove

19

Youin

He's asleep. I stir and look down at my body. This damaged body. I am irreparably damaged and already I put the best thing in my life in jeopardy because I couldn't live without her.

But my little treasure...my only son? I wanted him to be safe. Not just for his sake.

Because if anything happens to him—if I let anything happen to him she will forgive me. I love will cover a multitude of sins, that much is true and she's proven it time and time again.

But the death of her child is not a sin love could cover. I already know that, there's no need to test it.

"Why...why would you bring him here?" I whisper. "No...why were you there in the first place? With my son?!"

He looks away. "He's my son too," he whispers softly.

"No he isn't! You're not fucking real you're a—you're a spectre, you hear me? A ghost of Youin's past you don't have a son or a wife I do!"

He keeps his eyes averted—my eyes—our eyes as if he can hide from me? From the eyes of god. From the eyes of balance. From my eyes.

As if we are not the same.

"Look at me," I spit harshly.

He does so. His eyes are hooded, his face even. How brave. And of course he is. He's never lost anything. I lost everything and I will not go back to that fucking void—

"We're not in the void anymore," he says. Still softly. So softly. I clench my jaw.

"We were never anywhere. I was there," I swallow and pause, clearing my throat evening my tone. "I was there," I say again, quieter this time. "Alone. Without help or aid, or light of even the...the smallest droplet of water."

I close my eyes and it's like I'm back there. A shiver takes over me.

"I had to siphon sweat from mortals," I sneer, "just to survive. Just to keep my sanity. And you? You were busy not existing so don't you tell me about the void."

He looks up at me and frowns. "I was busy not existing? You think sweat from mortals sustained you? Why do you think I'm here and no other version of is? What about the very fist? Soft and childlike. He played in the water and did not take duties for centuries, just splashing—"

"I do not need you to tell me what I was—"

"Oh you do. Because perhaps you've forgotten. How about the version of you, once you learned your duties that only said that phrase: the balance is silent."

I scoff and clench my jaw.

"Or perhaps we should get to the root of your imprisonment. What about the version of you that was so lonely you decided to try to make children from yourself?"

I close my eyes. "What do you have to say, Youin?"

He crosses his arms. "You didn't survive off just sweat and tears, Youin. I preserved you. I am the strongest you've ever been, with enough brain and enough heart to comfort you, and keep you safe. And yet you despise me."

Despise is an awfully strong word. Hatred would've been fine.

"You were not there."

"It's alright," he whispers, wrapping his arms around me. I feel myself crumble. "You'll get out. Moria will come for you. You'll see. The demise will be on its way, with skull banner, waiting to free you."

I close my eyes tighter, shrinking away.

"Slade will come for you. They are no match for him. He will best them, and you two will conquer them all for daring to tread where no mortal ought."