empty ~ kurotsuki

𖡎 acknowledgments and discussion 𖡎

♡♡ACKNOWLEDGMENTS♡♡

i want to reiterate that this story was inspired by and contained lyrics from the song "Empty" by jaidenanimations and Boyinaband. i do not own the rights to the lyrics referenced in the story, nor are they my own. i tried to make it very clear when i was using the lyrics in the stit is a very powerful song with so much meaning behind it, and as someone who has been through the vicious cycle, it hit close to home. it takes a lot of courage to take such harsh experiences and turn them into art that speaks to a large volume of people. 

i would also like to thank two friends, who wish to remain anonymous, for reaching out and speaking with me about their own experiences and how they struggled through it. this topic is one of the hardest conversations to have as it is a significant element of the standards society holds for both women and men. 

this story was a difficult one to write. it resonated in my mind every minute throughout the process and thinking back on the topics inspiring specific scenes brought back a lot of hard memories for me. where i was then versus where i am now is night and day, and i could never appreciate those who helped me through it enough. despite how difficult it was, i feel like it continued to help me with my progress while also reeducating myself on what anorexia does to your body. 

the next few sections of the discussion will primarily come from a thorough research paper i wrote in my third year of nursing school. i want to be able to make this a valuable resource for those who are struggling or who would like to understand more about this disorder.

♡♡ABOUT ANOREXIA♡♡

an-o-rex-ia:
          [noun] MEDICINE TERM lack or loss of appetite for food

an-o-rex-ia:
          [noun] PSYCHIATRIC "Anorexia nervosa is characterized by a significant and persistent reduction in food intake leading to extremely low body weight in the context of age, sex, and physical health" (NIMH, 2017) and the disorder manifests in two different forms: restrictive and binging/purging.

Restrictive anorexia nervosa emphasizes the heavy restriction or avoidance of food intake. Binging/purging anorexia involves an individual engaging in periods of binge-eating then compensating their intake by self-induced vomiting, excessive exercising, and abuse of laxatives, diuretics, and enemas (Better Health Channel, 2012). 

While the cause of anorexia is unknown, there are factors that can increase the prevalence of the disorder: social and cultural attitudes about weight and beauty, familial conflict and influences, having a previously diagnosed anxiety disorder from childhood, a developed negative self image, having an ideology of perfectionism and being in control of things, traumatic events, bullying in schools or online, dieting for sports, and an experience of personal failure that "deserves" punishment (Comer, 2021). 

Anorexia has the highest mortality rate of all psychiatric disorders because of how it withers away your body the longer it progresses. It is critical to receive clinical or supportive interventions as soon as possible before the effects end up irreversible. However, it is definitely easier said than done.

♡♡SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS♡♡

Signs that someone may be anorexic can be spotted by apparent social cues and detected by acts of secrecy. 

When the individual is in a social setting where food is present, they may cut food into tiny pieces and fidget the food around the plate to distract others from their lack of eating. Some may hide food in their pockets or napkins while others aren't paying attention and mock chewing movements to make others believe they ate the food.