What. The. Fuck. (Aka a person wakes up as Haruno Sakura)

Battle on the Bridge! Zabuza Returns!

In the forest

A woman with long black hair picked a herd and placed it into a basket, when a bird perched on her shoulder and looked at curiously. The bird then flew off in the opposite direction she was facing. When she turned around she saw a boy in an orange jumpsuit and yellow hair passed out on the ground laying spread eagle on his back, with a Kuni in his hand. The bird flew and landed on the boys chest, while two other birds, one on his forehead, the other next to him, looked at him curiously. When the bird on his forehead moved the girl saw that he was wearing a leaf Shinobi forehead protector. Her eyes widened in shock as she remembered their last interaction. She stood up and began slowly walking towards him. She then reached her hand out scaring away the birds.

At Tazuna's house

"Here." Tsunami placed a bowl of food in front of Sasuke, who had just sat down at the table. Kakashi, Inari, and Tazuna were already there sitting. "Thank you." "Naruto didn't come back last night, either?" Tazuna questioned. "No." Sasuke answered plainly. "I wonder if Naruto's okay. To think a child's out in the middle of the night." Tsunami spoke with a worried tone. "Well, you don't need to worry. Although he may not seem to be, he's a full-fledge Ninja." Kakashi reassured. "I wonder... That idiot's probably all popped out right about now." Sasuke then stood up and began walking towards the door. "Where are you going?" Tsunami questioned. "I'm going for a walk." "But we're about to eat..." "You were going to eat without, Sakura?"

"You didn't know?" Sasuke turned to face Tsunami. His eyes squinted in confusion. "Didn't know what?" "That she isn't here." "What do you mean?" "Sasuke, Sakura has been working hard to heal the people here. She's been out all day and hasn't been here for a while. You just didn't notice because you've been spending all your time training." Kakashi explained. "I see..." Sasuke wouldn't admit it, but he felt disappointed in himself for not noticing his teammates disappearance. He then walked out.

In the forest

The woman reached her hand out above Naruto's next as if she was about to snap his next before moving it to his shoulder, shaking him awake. "You'll catch a cold if you keep sleeping here." Naruto groaned as he was woken up. He then sat upright and began to rub his eyes. "Who're you?" The girl smiled at him and Naruto blushed slightly. "Uh... Did you wake me up, sis? I mean, what're you doing here?" Naruto asked bashfully. "I'm gathering medicinal herbs." "Herbs?" "Yes. For healing injuries, sickness and the like." "I see..." A smirk grew on Naruto's face. 'If I get some herbs for Sakura she'll surely get all bashful.' Naruto thought as an image of how you'll react played in his head.

"Aw, Naruto! You shouldn't have! You're way more considerate and kind than that idiot, Sasuke! Man I'm so happy I could kiss you. In fact! I think I'll do just that." Imaginary you then gave Naruto a big kiss on the lips.

Naruto giggled and blush at the thought. "Hey, sis! Do you think I could pick some herbs too?" "Sure I don't see why not. But I am curious about the reason." "It's for my girlfriend, Sakura. Of course! She's a medical Ninja so I'm sure she'll be really happy if I give her some medical herbs!" The girls eyes widened. "A medical Ninja?" "Yeah! Isn't awesome! Kakashi-Sensei said that medical Ninjas are hard to find, because of how hard it is to become one! And she's really good at it too!" "Really? How good?" This made Naruto pause and think. "Well, I don't really know how good she is. But I do know that she can heal cuts, like those from a Kuni or Shuriken." "I see... Well, in that case I'm sure she'll be happy with this gift!"

Naruto and the girl were now picking herbs, with Naruto making his own little pile. "You sure got a lot to do early in the morning, sis..." "You, too. What've you been doing in a place like this so early?" A big smile grew on Naruto's face. "Training!" The girls eyes widened. "Could it be that... you're a Ninja or something? What with that headband and..." "Is that what I look like? Is it? Yup! I'm a Ninja!" Naruto's cheeks turned red from how excited he was. That someone had recognized him as a Ninja. "No kidding. You're great, aren't you." The girl praised making Naruto giggle. "But... why are you training?" "As for me, I want to get stronger!" "But, you already look strong enough." "No, no! I want to get even stronger!" "What for?" "To become the best Ninja in my village! I'm going to get everyone to recognize my strength! And I have to prove something to a certain person!"