Baby Without Benefits

Chapter Seven

HILLARY

I've come to realize that making the decision to have a baby and actually turning that dream into reality are two different things. My mom made it seem so easy whenever she told me stories of how I came to be conceived. She should have been honest and told me of the toll it would take on me. Unless it was actually that easy for her because if it was then way to go mom because for me it is quite the opposite.

Once again I find myself standing in the same examination room I was in three weeks ago waiting for Dr. Cushing. One particular poster captures my attention and it's one of a woman in different stages of pregnancy. It's quite remarkable what a woman's body is capable of. The fact that our bodies can grow and adjust to accommodate growing a whole human being inside us is astounding.

I look down at my very flat stomach knowing that one day soon it will grow into a bump. Amelia's baby bumps are always fascinating to me and she is much smaller than I am so I can't help but wonder how I will look when it's my turn to have one. Hopefully I will look like my mom because when she was pregnant with me she was positively glowing.

The door opens and I turn to face Dr. Cushing who has walked in with a smile and what I am assuming is my file in her hand.

"Good morning Miss Jones or should I say Dr. Jones." She greets shaking my hand.

"I see someone has been reading my file but call me Hillary please." I request her.

People are so hell bent on being referred to as Doctors just because they have PhDs but I have never been one to care about any of that.

"Hillary it is. How have you been? You've rescheduled your appointment twice." She asks ushering me to sit down.

"I know I've just had a crazy couple of weeks." I reply trying to play it off cool as if it didn't take every ounce of energy I could muster to make it for this appointment.

"What happened? Last I saw you, you were very excited about this. Did something happen? Change your mind?" She asks. "Because I assure you it's perfectly normal to freak out and decide to wait a little longer."

"On no, nothing like that. I still want this, so much. But you are right something did happen." I confess.

I might have made the decision to have a baby while drunk out of my mind but it is one I am standing by. I want a baby more than anything and every day that passes that thought becomes more and more solidified in my mind.

"What happened? Are you okay?"

"Yes I am, or at least I hope I am. Three weeks ago, I kinda had unprotected sex with someone." I inform her.

He reaction is much subtler that Amelia's when I told her but she still looks surprised. "Oh?"

"Yes, it's the reason I kept postponing my appointment. I wanted to give my body time to see if maybe something happened. According to my calculations, I am a few days late but I don't want to get my hopes up. I've been so stressed by this whole process, work, and my best friend's pregnancy that I might just be tense and not pregnant." I explain.

More than anything I want my delayed period to be because I am pregnant but even I know the chances are fifty fifty.

"Why don't we take a test to confirm and then we will take it from there." Dr. Cushing says handing me a specimen cup.

She shows me to the bathroom in the corner of the room which I promptly use so I can find out about this as fast as possible.

When Jericho and I hooked up, I had no other intentions other than having sex with a really hot guy. But then Amelia got in my head after I told her that we didn't use protection and ever since that day I have been hopeful. I did not intend to go down the same road my mom did but it seems fate had other plans.