Sapphire Stones

The wall of names

"You doing okay, Benny?" I ask, sitting down beside the Runner. He's sitting on one of the logs with Bark by the fire, which is just old ashes and burnt logs that didn't fully burn up last Greenie day.

Ben just shrugs, his eyes fixed on his hands, which are fidgeting in his lap. I place my hand on his back and run it up and down in a soothing motion.

"There's gotta be a way out. There's just gotta." I mutter despite the fact that I don't believe it myself.

"There isn't, V. Trust me." He replies, eyes still on his hands, his voice breaking. The dog beside Ben lays it's head on his lap, letting out a soft whine. I can see a few tears trickle down his face before dropping off the tip of his nose.

"Just because that wasn't it doesn't mean that there still isn't a place you guys haven't found yet. I'm sure that if you keep-"

"Stop. Just stop, okay?" Ben snaps, turning to face me. "We've looked everywhere. There isn't a single shucking spot in that damn Maze that we haven't run. If there was a way out, we would've found it by now."

I stare at Ben for a minute, studying him. He looks so incredibly hopeless and sad. I know that he's right. I know that it's useless to keep hoping, but something inside of me just won't give up. Something inside of me keeps telling me that there's a way out somewhere. That we can be free someday. Something inside of me hasn't lost hope yet.

"I think I'm gonna be a writer." I say after a few minutes of silence. Ben looks over at me, a confused look on his face. "When we get out of here." I add. "I'm gonna be a writer. I'm gonna write a book of my poetry and publish it for the whole world to read because I'm gonna be free. I'm not gonna stay here forever. One way or another, I'm getting out of here so that I can have a real, normal life."

The Runner beside me stays quiet, so I just keep on talking, similar to how I do when Gally has a nightmare.

"I'm gonna get another dog so that Bark can have a friend so that he's never lonely. I'm gonna have a house and kids and a job. I'll get married eventually and walk down the aisle and eat wedding cake and all of my friends will be invited. You, Minho, Newt, and I will all live next to each other and hang out all the time and my kids will call you all their uncles. We're gonna be best friends and tell our kids stories about this place because they deserve to know what we had to go through to get where we are. And if we can't find Logan and Chuck's parents, I'm gonna adopt them and give them a normal childhood that every kid deserves."

"And what if none of that ends up happening?" He asks, running a hand through his messy blonde hair.

"It will. I know it will."

"And where exactly does Gally fit into this dream of yours?"

"If he wants to leave this place and come with us, then I guess we'll just have to wait and see. It all depends on if he decides to leave. Then, we'll go from there." I reply with a shrug. "I want him to be in this dream so fucking bad, but I can't force him to come with us. He has to make that decision on his own."

Ben nods, quiet once more. He gently runs his hand through Bark's fur as he stares at the moonlit sky.

"It must be nice to have hope like that still."

He mutters before being silent again. I direct my gaze to the sky as well, my hand resting on Ben's shoulder in a comforting way. We're both quiet as we stare at the sky and stars.

🪐🪐🪐

"Did you ever see the wall, Logan?" I ask the young boy later that night. The two of us are sitting up in the tree house Gally built for me. 

"A wall? Sounds exciting." He replies in a sarcastic tone, rolling his eyes. I stand up, holding out my hand. He reluctantly takes it and I help him up.

"Follow me." I say quietly, climbing down the ladder. I wait for Logan to join me and then we start trekking through the woods and towards the West wall.

"How much longer?" Logan asks after a few minutes, already panting and out of breath.

"We're almost there, kid." I reply with a grin, pushing through the bushes and low hanging tree branches.

We reach our destination just a few minutes after. I step aside, letting Logan look at the wall in the faint light provided by the moon.

"It's kinda dark, so it's hard to see, but it's really pretty when there's daylight." I say, watching the young Glader.

"How's it pretty though? It's just a wall with some names carved into it." He mutters, running his fingers along the names delicately, as if the wall might crumble if he presses too hard.

"Because it's the one area of this hellhole where we're all united in a way. It's the same with the Bonfire. It's the one night each month where we're all one really big, shucked up family. Where we all forget the klunk circumstances we're in and just have fun. This is the only place in the whole Glade where we're all together, in a sense. I don't know, I just find it beautiful." I say with a shrug.

Logan nods and continues studying the names on the wall, hid eyebrows furrowed in concentration. 

"Why are some of them crossed off?" He asks suddenly, looking back at me. I sigh and step forward so that I'm standing next to him.

"Those are the Gladers that aren't with us anymore, kid. We had some dark days before you came here. Kids panicked. None of us knew what to do, so some of them just ran into the Maze."

"What happened to him?"

"George?" I ask. He nods. "He was stung a few days after we arrived. Started attacking another Glader. We didn't have the serum or anything, so Alby did what he thought was best." I say, sparing him the gory details.

"And him?" He asks, pointing to another name.

"Alfred was one who ran into the Maze. We never found him."

"And Stephen?"

"Stephen volunteered to go down the Box shaft a few months after we got here. We were trying to find ways out of here at the time. He was supposed to give us a signal if he found anything. We lowered him down with rope, but when we pulled him back up, he was dead and missing half his body." I reply, my voice soft as I remember that day.

A few minutes of silence passes over us as we both look at the wall. I take a few steps forward and pick an item up off the ground, holding it towards the young boy.

"What's this for?" He asks, taking the item out of my hand gently.

"It's your turn to carve your name. It's your turn to become an official Glader."

He takes a deep breath before walking towards the wall and choosing a place, raising the knife to the stone.

A few minutes later, Logan steps back, admiring his handiwork. He carved his name right under mine. He looks back at me, a wide grin on his face.

"Welcome to the Glade, kid." I say, smiling as we both look at the wall of names.