The Grilled Cheese Incident - A Chaotic Jeff Dunham Story

part 3 (double-date!)

Today was the day that Peanut, Jose, Url and Aj have there double-date. But, Peanut woke up kind of sick today. José noticed a few times through the day, but Peanut just said he was a bit tired and that he's fine.
Peanut looked in the mirror after getting ready. He didn't dress up too fancy, he only had on Jose's hoodie and sweatpants on. "JOSEEEEEEEEEE" Peanut yelled. Jose came running in. "Whats wrong?!" Jose then looked Peanut up and down. "Mi amor, you do know were going to a fancy restaurant?" He said. Peanut gave Jose puppy dog eyes. "But I'm tireddd.. plus Url is probably gonna be dressing the same way.." Jose sighed. "Fine. Just let me do your hair?" Peanut smiled. "Sure!"
After Jose finished Peanuts hair, Jose raised an eyebrow. "You feel warm... you feeling okay?" Peanut quickly made up a lie, "Yeah! Probably because im wearing this.." he smiled. Jose knew it was a lie but went along with it. They both didn't wanna miss the date.
About an hour later, they went out to the car to pick up Url and Aj. Peanut kept fucking with the radio and switching songs, and Jose kept smacking his hand away when a song that he liked came on. After another 10 minutes of chaos, they arrived at Walters house to pick up Url. Peanut texted Url saying they were here, and eventually Aj came out of the door looking like he came out of a emo movie from the 2000s, and Url came out with him looking like a discord mod. "Where are we going again?" Url asked. Peanut looked at Jose, he didn't know either. "To be honest, I kinda wanna go to Applebee's instead of a fancy restaurant." Peanut looked back to Aj and Url. "You guys wanna?" He asked. Url nodded. "I don't think I've ever been to Applebee's before?" Aj said. "There food is FIRE." Peanut said. Jose laughed, "They have a mix of fancy food and other shit." Url threw a paper at Peanut. He jumped, but he opened it and read it out loud. "Peanut is the Latino D fire- WHAT-" Url wheezed and Jose looked annoyed. "That's kind of private but YESSIR!" Peanut yelled and laughed. Jose hit Peanut, "No!" Peanut jumped a bit and coughed. Jose raised an eyebrow slightly at his cough, but started to drive to Applebee's. Url and Aj we're laughing in the back. "Peanut, why are you so jumpy?" Aj asked. Peanut just shrugged and looked out the window. Jose noticed that Peanut seemed to be a bit more quiet, but didn't say anything. "Hey Jose?" Peanut said. "Yeah?" Jose responded. "Uh, can we pull over into a gas station or something really quick?" Jose raised an eyebrow again. "Sure." He pulled over to a gas station, and went inside with Peanut. Aj and Url side eyed each other. "Why did they go in?" Aj asked. Url shrugged. "Maybe because Jose hit Peanut? But we're alone again kitten!" Aj rolled his eyes, "Url darling, we talked about this..." Url chuckled. "But I can't stop its addicting! I even called grandpa kitten before." Aj raised an eyebrow "did you get your ass kicked?" He asked. "Surprisingly no, but I swear he almost had a heart attack." As Aj and Url we're talking, Jose and Peanut came back. They seemed a bit happier which is good. "We got you guys some food!" Peanut said, and threw candy and chips at Url and Aj. "JOSE DID YOU JUST SEE THAT? HES HARASSING ME!" Url yelled as a joke, and Peanut threw the note back at Url and laughed. Aj watched in terror. "Jose, why did you and Peanut go in there?" Aj asked. "Just some private stuff." Jose responded as he got back on the road. "They we're having sex!" Url said as a joke. Peanut quickly turned his head at Url. "NO WE WEREN'T." Url laughed, "you wish you were!" Jose side eyed Peanut and put a hand on his thigh. Peanut turned to face Jose and smiled. "EW!" Aj yelled. Url laughed harder. A few moments later, they pulled into Applebees. Jose got out of the car and opened the door for Peanut. Url opened the door for Aj, and they walked into the restaurant. As they entered the restaurant, they greeted Walter? "Walter since when did you work at Applebees?" Peanut asked. Walter flipped him off and took them all to a booth. Jose and Peanut sat together obviously, Url and Aj also sat together. Walter handed a menu to Aj and Jose nicely, and then threw the other menus at Peanut and Url. "Hey!" Peanut said. Walter laughed and walked off. Jose held in his laugh, and wrapped an arm around Peanut. "What do you want, pretty boy?" Jose asked. Peanut looked through the menu giving Jose a hard time while Url and Aj already know what there getting. Around 10 minutes later, Walter came back to see what they wanted. Peanut was STILL looking. Jose was about to flip the table over. "Peanut just pick something!" Jose said. Peanut whined. "I don't know what I waaaanttt!" Jose grunted. "Get chicken fingers, you like chicken fingers!" Peanut paused for a moment. "They have chicken fingers here?" Jose sighed. "Mi amor, we have been over this atleast 15 times, they have chicken fingers here." Peanut paused again. "I'll getttt... actually nevermind.." Url was laughing his ass off and recording it, ane so was Aj (minus the recording part.)  They both calmly told Walter what they wanted and Walter walked away. "Peanut, I swear to God..." Jose said. Peanut giggled. "I'm lookingg.." Jose grunted, "Your not gonna get it tonight if you don't pick out something." Peanut quickly turned to Jose. "I'll get chicken fingers..." Jose chuckled. "Thats what I thought." Url was laughing so hard he was crying, "HOMO!" He yelled, getting attention from other people around. Aj was just sitting there calmly. Peanut then threw a dirty napkin at Url and he screamed like a girl. "Peanut, don't throw things." Jose said. "Fineeee." Peanut leaned against Jose, and Jose wrapped an arm around Peanut, pulling him closer. Url pointed at them "is that rizz?" Aj laughed. "So rizzy!" Jose rolled his eyes and said a your mom joke to Url that would literally make you decompose in SECONDS. Url's jaw dropped and Aj held in his laughter. Walter then came back. "Does the purple idiot want something yet?" Walter asked Jose. "He'll have chicken fingers." He said. Peanut smiled. "God, all of that just to pick out chicken fingers... idiot." Walter said. Peanut raised an eyebrow "Hey I heard that!" He said. Walter chuckled. "Fatass." Jose sighed, "Walter, stop." Peanut laughed, "Peanut, you stop too." Jose said. "But..." Peanut looked at Jose. "Do you want it later or not?" Jose asked. Peanut then crossed his arms and leaned against Jose. Jose chuckled, "thats what I thought." Walter just stared at them. "What is he getting later?" He asked. "Uh... Mind your business." Jose responded. Walter laughed and walked off. Url and Aj still in shock of both this, and the your mom joke he made. "we did NOT need to know that..." Aj said. Jose just laughed, picking up Peanut and putting him on his lap. Peanut FOLDED. Url and Aj watching in terror. "Damn thats RIZZY!" Url said, giggling his ass off. A few minutes later, Walter came back with the food. He almost dropped a plate when he saw Peanut sitting in Joses lap. "Grandpa please dont turn into dust-" Url said. Walter rolled his eyes and gave everyone their food. Peanut got off Jose and started to eat. Jose looked at Peanut. "You eat very loudly..." Jose said. Peanut giggled and gave Jose a fry. "You love me, I know!" Jose smirked and pulled Peanut close. "Well, I do.." Url watched them. "Jose are you gonna marry Peanut?" Jose paused for a moment, "I'd hope so." He said. Peanut started sauealing and kicking his feet like the goober he is. "Alright, go eat." Jose said to Peanut. Urls jaw DROPPED. Aj was just busy eating, he enjoyed the food very much. Url looked at Aj and hugged him. "I fucking love you." Aj smiled, "I love you too, my darling..."