Today was the day the group was gonna go out for a pool party. It was Peanuts idea of course, and him and Jose were getting ready. "Hey Jose?" Peanut asked. "Hm?" Jose peaked in from the hallway. Peanut giggled at Jose for a moment, "Can you help me with my hair?" He asked. Jose raised an eyebrow at his stupid question. "Why?" he asked. "...Because were going out?" Peanut raised an eyebrow. Jose chuckled and walked towards Peanut. "Whats the point if its gonna get ruined by the water?" He raised an eyebrow. Peanut paused and his face went blank for a moment. "I forgot..." he smiled softly up at Jose. "Yeah. I can tell." Jose chuckled and pat Peanuts head.
A few moments pass and Peanut tried on his swim shorts. "HEY JOSE?!" Peanut yelled. Jose ran in. "What?!" He asked. Peanut was looking in the mirror at himself, not saying anything for a moment. "...um, do I like... look fat in this?" He asked, looking a bit sad as he looked at himself in the mirror. Jose approached Peanut slowly, his expression softening. "No, of course not... why?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Peanut sniffled. "Just wondering..." he said. Jose looked Peanut up and down and then hugged him, picking him up. "Come on... were gonna be late." (PT IDK TEHE)On the way to the place, Peanut was having a mental breakdown the whole ride to the point where Jose had to pull over. You must be wondering why... well. Jose ran over a squirrel on accident.
"Peanut, it's gonna be fine, calm down..." Jose said to Peanut, trying not to laugh. Peanut was just sobbing and trying to climb out of the car window. Jose sighed, and grabbed Peanut, holding him in place, still struggling not to laugh. "YOU BETTER DRIVE BACK THERE AND APOLOGIZE TO IT!!-" Peanut yelled. Jose just started bursting out laughing, hugging Peanut. "I-ITS NOT FUNNY!! Y-YOU RAN OVER A FUCKING SQUIRREL!" Jose just laughed more. "Mi amor, calm down it isn't that serious!" Peanut pulled away from Jose, crossing his arms in a dramatic and fussy way. "I-i'm not talking to you!" He said, sniffling. Jose laughed even more. A few moments pass, and Walter called. Jose picked up, still giggling. "What do you want." He asked. "You guys are like, 15 minutes late! Where the hell are you guys?!" Walter yelled. Jose sighed, "I accidentally ran over a squirrel and had to pull over because this one is having a mental breakdown because of it." He said. Walter laughed, "Well hurry up." Walter then hung up on Jose. Peanut was looking out the window, sniffling but not crying anymore. Jose turned to Peanut with a sofr expression. "You want ice cream..?" He asked, putting a hand on Peanuts thigh. Peanut quickly looked at Jose, "YES!"Jose chuckled, and drove to a near by ice cream place. Peanut was going crazy, squealing and bouncing. At a red light, Jose turned to face Peanut and smacked the back of Peanuts head. "Oww you asshole!" Peanut said, trying to hit Jose back. Jose chuckled, pointing out the window. Peanut immediately looked, and got distracted by a few farm animals. "Anything interesting?" Jose asked, driving again. "HORSE!!!" Peanut yelled, pointing at the horse. Jose didn't look, but he did smile at Peanuts reaction. A little bit later, Peanut got his ice cream. Jose didn't get anything. "Hey Jose?" Peanut said. "Hm?" Jose responded. Peanut held the ice cream in Joses face. "Want some?" Peanut smiled. Jose was more focused on driving. "Not now, mi amor. gracias de calquier forma." He smiled, putting his hand on Peanuts thigh. Peanut giggled, and continued to eat. About an hour later, they arrived at the place. "ew, Walter looks weird with no shirt..." Peanut said. Jose tried not to laugh, "Yeah." He wrapped an arm around Peanut. As they both walk out of the car, they hear Url yelling, and splashing. Peanut looked up at Jose. "How much do you wanna bet someone threw Url's phone in the water?" He giggled. Jose smiled, "5 bucks." Peanut giggled more, running to see what happened. "GIVE ME MY PHONE!" Url yelled, trhing to grab it from Achmed. "QUIT SENDING PICS TO AJ!" Achmed yelled back. Peanuts jaw DROPPED. He slowly turned his head to Jose, who was also shocked. "I WASN'T!" Url yelled, grabbed his phone and shoving Achmed in the pool. "AHH! - YOU ASSHOLE." Achmed yelled. Url laughed, "HAHA LOSER!" He sat back down next to Aj. Jose took Peanuts hand and pulled him closer. "Thats a bit gay." Url said to Jose. "Shut up. Achmed said you send "pics" to Aj." Jose said. "So do you!" Url said. Jose shrugged, "Your not wrong." He replied, smirking a bit. Peanut yelled in a dramatic way. "NO! WHAT- SHHH!" He yelled. Jose chuckled, patting Peanut on the head. Peanut's face went blank for a moment. Jose raised an eyebrow. "What?" He asked. "Um... I kinda left the ice cream in the car..." he looked up at Jose, smiling awkwardly. Joses jaw dropped. "Are you serious?" He asked. Peanut giggled a bit, "yeah..." Jose sighed and ran to his truck. "Damn thats the fastest I seen him run-" Url said, Aj then hit Url in the shoulder. "Don't say that!" Aj said. "What?! It's true!" Url said. "Well, he does love and care for his truck." Diane said. "See?" Url said. Aj sighed and waved at Peanut. Peanut waved back, walking towards Aj. "HI!" Peanut said. A few moments later, Jose ran back to Peanut, throwing swim shorts at his face. "OW-" Peanut yelped, jumping a bit. "Idiot." Jose said, walking to the chnaging room. Peanut followed, and then ran into the same room as Jose. "Anddddd there he goes!" Diane said, watching Peanut run into the same room as Jose. A few moments later, Jose walked out of the room looking like hot Latino BADASS. While Peanut looks stupid with the banana patterned swim shorts. Url started wheezing after seeing Peanut, taking a picture of him. "...JOSE URL JUST TOOK A PICTURE OF ME WITHOUT MY CONSENT!" Peanut yelled, jumping onto Joses back. Jose sighed, and took Urls phone out of his hands. "Hey give that back!" Url said. Aj watched, being very interested in whats about to happen. Jose deleted the picture off Urls phone, and gave it back. "YOU GUYS ARE ANNOYING." Url yelled. "Calm down!" Aj said, giggling. "Aw man now I cant post it and get tiktok famous..." Url said. Jose chuckled at his stupid response. "JOSE IM SLIPPING-" Peanut was holding onto Jose for dear life, just for Jose to shove Peanut in the pool. Peanut screamed. "OH YOU LITTLE LATINO BITCH!" Peanut yelled, smiling. Jose laughed a bit, using the ladder to get in the pool with Peanut. Peanut then tried to jump at Jose, but failed. Why? There in water. "You idiot." Jose grabbed Peanut, and held him. Peanut calmed down. "I hope you guys know Url was recording all of this..." Diane said. "I don't really care." Jose said, not looking at them, his attention was all on Peanut."RIZZ!!!" Url yelled. Diane chuckled, and sat next to Achmed. "LITERALLY THE MOST RIZZLER TWIZZLERS!" Url yelled again. "Can you guys SHUT UP." Walter yelled. Diane just laughed. Url grabbed the nerf gun next to them, and shooted at Walter. "OW - STOP THAT!" Walter yelled, "THIS IS WHY I HATE TEENAGERS!" He yelled again, getting up and ran to the opposite side of where Url and Aj were. Jose wasn't paying any attention to them, he was just chilling with Peanut. Url started to then shoot at Jose. Uh oh. "STOP!" Jose yelled, he rarely yells. Peanut just giggled, and gave Url a smirk and side eye. Url rolled his eyes and started shooting at Achmed. Kinda stupid because the little darts just kept going through him, or at his face. "HAHA, you idiot!" Achmed yelled. Jose turned to give Url the *stop that or else* face. Peanut giggled even more, letting go of Jose. Jose then grabbed Peanuts hips tight, making sure he doesn't go anywhere. "Woah-" Peanut said, a bit shocked. Url laughed at them, and then threw a pool noodle in the water. Peanut noticed, "Hey babe?" Peanut said. "Hm?" Jose raised an eyebrow. "Let go for a moment! I have an idea." Peanut said. Jose let go, and crossed his arms. He watched Peanut grab the noodle and start abusing the shit out of Url with the noodle. Jose bursted out laughing, and Url was running for his life. Peanut then grabbed Urls ankles and flung him into the water. "HAHA LOSERRRRR" Peanut yelled, doing a cannonball in the water just to continue to hit Url. Aj was just watching, eating chips, being very entertained at this experience. Diane was also watching with Achmed. "There gonna kill each other." Diane said, turning to face Achmed. Achmed laughed. "Yup." Url managed to grab a surfing board from the side, and started to chase Peanut with it. "OH SHIT- JOSE HELP!" Peanut swam as fast as he could to Jose, Url then smacked the shit out of Peanut with the board. "FUCK- OW!" Peanut grabbed the side of the pool and tried climbing out. "Idiot..." Jose just went over to Peanut and grabbed him. "GOD DAMN IT I WAS SO CLOSE!" Url yelled, throwing the surf board at Walter. "OW! STOP!" Walter yelled, getting up to move away from everyone AGAIN. Url pointed and laughed at Walter. Jose climbed out of the pool and sat down, pulling Peanut onto his lap. Peanut giggled and covered his face. "IS THAT RIZZ?!" Url yelled. Jose rolled his eyes. "Leave them alone, kiddo." Diane said. "Fine." Url said, sitting next to Aj. "Darling, look at Edward! Isn't he so cute?" Aj said, shoving his twilight book in Urls face. "Aj, pretend im Edward." Url said. Aj looked Url up and down for a moment, "Your too fat to be Edward, darling... Love you, though! No hurt feelings." Aj said, continuing to read the book. Urls jaw dropped and so did everyone else that heard Aj. "THAT WAS INSANE." Peanut said, looking at Jose. Jose nodded, and gave Peanut a chip. Url grabbed Aj by the arm, and spun him around to fling him into the water, and threw his twilight book behind the gate. Aj yelled, "EDWARD, NO!!" Aj climbed out of the water and ran to get the book. Url laughed, and sat back down. Bubba J then arrived. "Hi guys!" He said. Jose waved. "Your out of breath, you good?" Jose asked. Bubba J giggled. "The cops are after me!" He responded. Jose raised both eyebrows. "...what did you do?" He asked. "I hit a old person crossing the road on accident..." Bubba J responded. "YOU HIT WHAT?" Jose said, getting up. Peanut fell back since he was sitting on Joses lap. "I said I hit a old person crossing the road..." Bubba J said. "IS YOUR CAR OKAY?!" Jose asked. Walter raised an eyebrow. "Why the car?!" He asked. "Well he has a nice car!" Jose said. Walter laughed. "I think the old person is okay!" Bubba J said, giggling. "Just so you know, your boyfriend is mad at you." Diane said, pointing at Peanut. "...shit, oops..." Jose said, turning to face Peanut. His arms were crossed, and was giving Jose the death stare. "DID YOU FORGET I WAS ON YOUR LAP." Peanut yelled. Jose chuckled, and picked up Peanut. "Sorry!" Peanut growled, and hugged Jose. Diane laughed, and watched as Aj was running back with his book. Url sighed, he hated Edward. He was always jealous."Url darling, Edward is okay!" Aj said, running back to Url. "...greeeat." Url said, sitting back down. Aj sat next to Url, and put the book down. "I love you more than Edward, just remember that." Aj said, giving Url a kiss on the cheek. Jose smirked, it was uis chance to get Url back. "Is that rizz?" Jose said, mocking Url. Url grunted, flipping Jose off as he hugged Aj. Jose laughed, putting Peanut down. Peanut stared up at Jose. "What are you doing?" Peanut asked. Jose raised an eyebrow, confused. "Pick me back up!" Peanut demanded, raising his arms. Jose chuckled, picking up Peanut again. "I like being in your arms..." Peanut said, burrying his face in Joses shoulder. Jose chuckled and just held Peanut. Diane smiled at how wholesome this was, until police sirens were heard. Bubba J started yelling, and ran into the pool. Achmed started panicking a bit, running around. Jose raised an eyebrow, and saw a bomb in Achmeds pocket. "Peanut... we need to go." Jose said, getting up. "Why? Whats going on? Its just sirens!" Peanut said. Jose pointed at Achmed, the bomb about to fall out of his pocket. Peanut paused for a moment. "...ohh..." he said. Jose picked up Peanut and ran to his truck. Diane pointed at Bubba J. "HES DROWNING!" she yelled. Walter sighed. "SHUT THE HELL UP!" He yelled, walking towards the pool to grab Bubba J. Url was recording everything, laughing. "Father, why do you have bombs in your pocket?" Aj asked. Achmed laughed. "No reason!" He said. Achmed then ran to Bubba J's car. Bubba J grabbed his beer and ran after Achmed. The police arrive at the place. "We got a noise complaint." The officer said. Walter looked around, and came up with a lie. "Not many people are here, bud. Wrong place?" He said. The officer shrugged and walked away. Jose and Peanut already left. Url pointed his phone at Walter, doing a 0.5 video on him and his huge forehead. Aj was giggling, following Url and Walter around. "Your forehead is pretty big!" Aj said to Walter. "SHUT UP, GO AWAY!" Walter yelled, and then he tripped over a garden hose. Diane bursted out laughing, and walked to her car.
YOU ARE READING
The Grilled Cheese Incident - A Chaotic Jeff Dunham Story
Humor(creates story with RIZZ.)
