I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE WARNING THAT THIS JOURNAL MAY CONTAIN UNCOMFORTABLE TOPICS REGARDING SEXUAL THINGS, SH (at times), AND WILL CONTAIN CUSS WORDS. IF YOU BELIEVE THESE MAY TRIGGER YOU OR MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE, PLEASE LEAVE. THIS IS MY PERSONAL JOURNAL, SO I WILL BE WRITING PERSONAL THOUGHTS THAT I USUALLY DON'T TELL PEOPLE. I WILL ALSO INCLUDE THINGS THAT HAPPENED THAT DAY. IF THINGS WERE COOL.
(Btw, this is a rewrite of the last one)
Online name: Bleu / Ceru
IRL name: Ezekiel Sage Hill
Preferred name: Zeke (call me this if you know me!)
DOB: August 2
Age: 16
Gender: FTM / Trans Male (trying to socially transition online and at school. I came out to my family but not everyone supports, so wtv)
Sexuality / Orientation: Pansexual, Emophilic, possibly polyamorous.
Status: Single, though I have a million crushes on people. But I am somehow also extremely oblivious to someone crushing on me.
Occupation: High school junior. I also take some running start college classes.
Hair color: My natural hair color is coming back now, which is brown. Darker than it used to be because I've dyed it so dark in the past.
Eye color: Central heterochromia with green and orangey-brown. A bit of blue lining, as my stepmom says.
Height: 5'4 and 3/4".
Weight: 135 lbs. Wow. Looking back, the last thing I wrote in this was 143 lbs. I've lost almost 10 lbs in just a few months. I haven't even been working out much lmao. It's just because I don't eat too much.
Birth marks: I have one under my right eye, but it's really faint. I have a few moles and freckles scattered across my body.
Tattoos / Piercings: I only have earrings. They're silver.
Mental status (things I've actually been diagnosed with by a therapist): MDD (moderate depression), GAD (general anxiety), OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder; mild), insomnia, possibly ADHD? (my therapist wasn't sure. We didn't do an actual test before I was pulled out of therapy).
Diet: I sometimes eat breakfast, never eat lunch, and always eat dinner. Breakfast is either a little bit of cereal or two pieces of toast and dinner is just whatever my parents make.
Eyesight: 20/-150. I have contacts that I use only in my right eye. I have astigmatism.
Country: USA
Languages: English prominently, a lot of Spanish, and bits and pieces of... Japanese, French, German, and Russian.
Criminal record: Only one thing.... I stole your heart. ;) /j
Personality type: INFP-T
Temper: It's a little up and down, depending on my sleep and what's happened that day.
Intro/Extro/Ambi: Introvert prominently. I don't like social interaction IRL
Self-esteem: Very low.
Hobbies: Drawing, writing (this one is big), creating characters, character.ai lmao, reading.
Phobias: Thanatophobia (fear of death), autophobia (fear of being alone / fear of myself), anuptaphobia (fear of ending up alone / of never finding love), haphephobia (fear of being touched by strangers; I should clarify that I'm not afraid of it, it just makes me extremely uncomfortable), claustrophobia (fear of small spaces), acrophobia (fear of heights), and aerophobia (fear of flying / planes).
Habits: Chewing nails, biting lips, fidgeting with fingers, running my fingers through my hair, and nonstop movement.
Angered by: Small things, but I usually keep them to myself.
Pet peeves: Cracking knuckles (i hate it and my siblings do it just to upset me), chewing with mouth open, and smacking gum, etc.
Desires: A relationship- Also, I'm emophilic, meaning that I fall in love super fast. It usually happens as soon as someone starts being kind to me, in certain situations. I'm not used to kindness, so I crave it.
Love language: Very physically affectionate. It's a little harder for me to communicate it in words. Hugs and pats on the head are very common. I LOVE BEING PET ON THE HEAD.
Love fact: I've never kissed anyone.
Love type: I get a little obsessed with people when I fall in love with them. I nonstop check on them and like to talk to them. I crave eye contact and I really like being touched somehow, like hand-holding or hugs. Falling in love makes me really shaky. I'll start shaking like I'm cold because I get so overwhelmed about it.
Communication method: I have taken a test to see whether I'm an aggressive, passive, passive-aggressive, or assertive communicator. Based on a test I took, I guess I'm passive-aggressive lol.
Accent: A Pacific Northwest American accent.
Profanity: I may use cuss words online often, but I rarely say them IRL because it makes me uncomfortable.
Humor: Anything. Especially dad jokes lmao. I'd be a great dad. B)
Goals: To someday write a book, become an English teacher, and have at least two kids. Possibly a relationship with someone, if I'm lucky?
