The Soldier You Became||Marvel AU||

The Winter Soldier

~~~~CHAPTER ONE~~~

TW: blood, misspelled words, angst, mention of panic attacks

Miri wiped the blood from his mouth. He was so tired. Hydra had been a nuisance all day. All he wanted to do was return to the Avengers compound and lay in Loki's arms. Miri started to daydream before a loud, sarcastic voice snapped him out of it. "hey, sky guy, get your head in the game!"

Tony Stark remarked over the speaker in Miri's ear. Sky Guy was a nickname given to him by Tony when they first met. It was not Miri's fondest memory, but nobody could get Stark to stop with his absurd habit of nicknaming people. "Shut up, tin can," Miri scoffed before stabbing his blade into a Hydra soldier, causing them to collapse. 

Miri sighed, killing mortals..was this really his past time? He had been on earth for almost 19 years now, yet it never felt like home. He had come here after the death of his two-month-old, Valiaun. Odin had not been happy about the child's birth and sent servants to take him away. Of course, that's only what Miri and Loki knew. Odin had threatened Miri's life if he were to tell anyone. So Loki and Miri came to Midgard with Thor, who had no idea about the child nor why Miri took the offer to join the Avengers so quickly.

 Miri just wanted a way to relieve his pent-up anger and sadness..but as years went by, Miri had become numb to the deaths as if they weren't enough to satisfy his rage. Bam! Miri felt a strong pain in his back. Immediately, he felt blood pool down his armor. Groaning, Miri pulled the knife out of his side, looking for the one who had managed to stab him. He saw no one. "Ugh!" he shouted in frustration as he attempted to heal himself, only to be struck with another knife to his stomach. His eyes searched the area he was in..he realized..he hadn't heard anyone over the radio in a while. "Ugh. Steve, Natasha, Tony! I could really use some backup!" He shouted into the microphone, but he got no response... 

"Sam? Thor?" His voice quivered as he was hit with another knife. "Ow!" He was frustrated. Where had they gone? Sensing another blade about to be thrown at him, Miri put up a forcefield around himself, something he should have probably done earlier, but now was not the time to dwell on that. Miri pulled the blade out of his shoulder, healing it. "Whos there!?" Miri shouted, and a figure stepped out of the bushes. A tall man with dark clothes...at first glance, Miri thought it was Loki. "Loki? What are you doing here?" Miri whispered, figuring his husband had heard that the Avengers needed extra help, but upon further inspection...that man wasn't Loki. Miri's eyes widened..that face, it was impossible right? "v..valiaun..?" Miri whispered, but as soon as he let down his shield, the man was...gone.

Miri felt his body go numb. His breathing picked up significantly as he suddenly lost feeling in his legs and fell to the forest floor. It couldn't have been Valiaun. It was impossible. Valiaun was dead. He was killed in front of them. Miri felt tears well in his eyes as he tried to control his breathing. Miri's whole body was numb and tingly, which only served to make him panic more. Miri gasped and sobbed as the visual of both baby Valiaun's face and this new man's face played in his mind. It was a coincidence. Just a coincidence. But his power..he saw the man's name was Valiaun Thor Lokisson. His parents were Miri Ojani and Loki Laufeysson, but it was impossible. It couldn't be possible. Maybe his power had malfunctioned due to his stress? The thoughts kept rushing through his head, trying desperately to make sense of what he had just seen. His powers never did that. His abilities never malfunction. 

They've always been right...Miri was so lost in thought and pure dishevelment that he didn't notice Thor had grabbed his arm. Miri was so dizzy his breath was still coming in quick gasps...the next thing Miri knew he was waking up in his and Loki's bedroom. Miri blinks a bit before sitting up..his body hurts, and Loki immediately makes him lie back down. "No, my love, stay lying down. You're okay. We're just in our room," Loki whispers. Lovingly brushing Miri's hair out of his face."I'm fine, lo.." Miri mumbled before sitting up despite Loki's objection. "Oh, Miri..you had me so worried... They said when they found you, you were...well.." Loki looked down. He knew Miri whispering Valiaun's name meant he had a panic attack. "You were not okay." He chose his words carefully. He didn't want to trigger another breakdown... Miri looked at Loki, tears in his eyes. "Loki, I saw him," he said suddenly, causing Loki to frown slightly. "Miri.." he tried to coax his love not to go back down the rabbit hole of denial. "No loki. I'm serious." Miri stared at Loki, his expression blank.