Seizing Change

Andre

After supper Me and Ty sign on to play raft with the guys for a bit but he's quiet and I can tell he's really not feeling it. The new meds are really messing with him, its hard to believe what such a small pill can do to someone. Gloria comes in around nine and tells him he needs to get ready for bed. He didn't argue with her, I think he's beat, besides if he doesn't get enough sleep the seizures get worse so why push it.

Its weird but since moving here I have no desire to sneak out or stay up late like I used to.

Not that I haven't had the opportunity. Eddie's tried to get me to come to a few parties at his cousins but I keep coming up with excuses or reasons I can't go.

I never used to say no to a party.

Hell I never missed one.

Most of the time I'm to tired to go now.

I don't sleep like the dead anymore.

I wake up a lot to Tyler's seizure alarm.

I never knew such things existed but I have to admit its pretty handy.

Dad showed it to me one day after we moved in so I would know how to shut it off if I needed to. Its just a flat sensor pad that sits under his mattress and it detects any rapid movement or shaking and an alarm goes off to let us know he's having a seizure.

At first I was annoyed by it waking me up at random times during the night.

Then it would make me panic and run as fast as I could to make sure he didn't fall.

I'm usually the one to sit with him through the night when he seizes. I always manage to get there before Dad or Gloria, even though their rooms right across the hall.

On the mornings where I would wake up to my own alarm I would still run to his room and make sure he was still alive.

For some reason it scared me if it didn't go off. Like somehow that meant he wasn't breathing or had died in his sleep.

We sign off and he gets up as I close my laptop and back away from the desk to leave. He doesn't move when I walk by him and I turn back to look at him recognizing that blank stare instantly. He starts to lean and I grab him before he can fall. His body is stiff as a board but i manage to get him down without dropping him.

I start the timer on my phone and put it on the floor beside me as he groans and arches his back. I Try to keep him on his side but the jerks are strong. His head is hitting the floor so hard I'm afraid he's going to give himself a concussion. I try to hold his head but it keeps jerking out of my hands. My eyes fall on the pillow on the bed and I snatch it and slide it under his head. It's better, but now it sounds like he's suffocating. I push the pillow until his head is just on the edge and hold it so it stays in place.

I lean back a bit, my other hand holding his shoulder so he doesn't jerk onto his back.