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James wedged his hand between her tightly closed knees and slid his hands further up to rest on her thighs. "Darling, you can't stay mad at me forever." He couldn't help but chuckle softly, a hint of dryness ever-present in his voice.
The train zipping down the tracks from Hogwarts lightly rocked the two back and forth. "I apologized, did I not?" He asked as he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek. He didn't want to leave for the holidays on bad terms.
"An apology doesn't cut it." She muttered. However, her body gave a different reaction than her annoyed tone as she melted into his touch, craving more.
He couldn't help but smirk. He had know the apology would not be enough to mend things and that she desired him to take initiative. "Hm, how about flowers? A necklace, perhaps?" He teased. James enjoyed pushing his luck and seeing how much she'd let him get away with. The touch of his thumb caressed her inner thigh in a gentle, yet calculated movement.
She shook her head in disbelief. "You're not going to buy your way to forgiveness." She scoffed. "Not anymore."
He raised an eyebrow at her response, a bit surprised by it as well. "Oh? And why is that? Are you growing a backbone?" James teased. He knew he was an ass, but that was simply part of his personality. "You've let me off the hook before, have you not?" He questioned before his hand glided up her thigh for a second time and squeezed her soft, supple flesh.
She quickly pushed his hand off of her. "I'm tired of you flirting with other girls. You have a girlfriend, believe it or not." She grumbled out as her eyes stared at the zooming fields outside the window.
He groaned at her reaction, annoyed his attempt hadn't landed. He quickly realized he didn't like when she was mad at him. The thought of her being upset with his made his stomach sink lower than it already was. "Yes, yes." He admitted, rolling his eyes. "You're right, I shouldn't flirt with other girls." He let the silence fall between them before deciding to try one last attempt at making amends. "But... I have a solution." He began slowly.
She glanced over at him with narrowed eyes. "Let's hear it then."
James took a deep breath, trying his hardest to keep his tone nonchalant and uninterested in a pathetic attempt to prevent her from knowing that he was nervous. "What if I just stop flirting with them?" He questioned, his voice laced with a sarcastic tone. This could potentially be the stupidest attempt to make amends he'd ever made. He knew it was a shitty apology.
She rolled her eyes at him in disgust. "As if." She knew he wouldn't be able to stop, after-all it was his favorite hobby. She, however, didn't know how much more of it she could take.
He scoffed at the response, crossing his arms over his chest as he slumped back into his seat. Perhaps she was right. He thought she may have appreciated the effort, but he was probably wrong. "Fine, fine." He muttered before glancing over at her. He thought maybe a different approach was necessary, if she was even willing to listen. "I suppose I should tell you the reason behind my behaviors?" He proposed quietly, his voice softer than before.
She was too upset to even look at him. She brought her knees up to her chest, comforting herself, as her gaze fell back to the surroundings outside.
James was growing more concerned by the minute, his stomach churning more with every second that passed. He couldn't stand to see her upset anymore. "Sweetheart." He began, her pet name being a conscious attempt to gain her attention. She wouldn't want to admit it, but she liked when he called her that. Though his plan wasn't exactly working. He tried again. "Look at me."
"No." One simple word. Yet, it held so much attitude behind it. She was a stubborn girl, always able to hold a grudge for as long as necessary.
He took a deep breath, growing more and more impatient by the second. Why wouldn't she just listen to him? Why couldn't she just hear what he had to say? He decided to take more of a direct approach. He grabbed her chin and turned her head so that they were facing each other.
When he did that, her glassy eyes stared into his. Tears threatened to spill as they held so many emotions. Betrayal. Insecurity. Heartbreak. That is only to name a few.
He froze as soon as those glassy eyes met his own. He saw every emotion she felt staring back at him. How could he have possibly have expected a positive reaction with the way he had treated her? He instantly regretted his decisions and actions, realizing now just how much of a jerk he had been. The tears in her eyes made him feel as though he had been punched straight in the chest. His breathing became more labored and his heart felt as if it were about to beat right out of his chest.
She closed her eyes as it only pained her to watch him hurt. Ironic, isn't it? He hurts her and then suddenly she feels bad that he hurt himself.
He wanted to scream at himself for all the bad decisions he had made. For all the times he'd been an insensitive ass. James wasn't used to seeing her cry, especially not because of him. He desperately wanted to wipe the tears from her eyes, to reassure her that everything was okay, but the guilt was already eating him alive. She wouldn't understand his reasoning behind any of this.
"Just explain." Her voice broke over the silence, just barely over a whisper. He didn't want to hear his sorry excuses but she didn't want to leave like this either.
"Well..." His voice trailed off as he thought for a moment. How could he even explain it all? He didn't want to come across as weak in any way, but he had a feeling this was going to be what he had to do. "I suppose I simply wanted to see if I still had it." He admitted quietly. "I wanted to see if I could still pull girls."
She scoffed. "When you have a girlfriend though? Do you have no respect for me?"
His breath became even harder to catch as his heart clenched. To be perfectly honest, no. He didn't think he respected her. That was the entire reason he had treated her the way he did. His pride and selfishness were all consuming during this entire thing. "No." He admitted, his voice cracking. The thought of his true selfishness was only now hitting him.
She stood up, quickly brushing off her skirt. "I apologize that you were too damn stupid to realize what an amazing woman you had." She spat out, wiping her eyes. She wanted to come off as strong, composed. But at the same time all she wanted to do was scream and cry as she made her way out of the compartment.
He flinched when she stood up and said those words that cut him like a knife. James didn't even know how to respond. "No, wait!" He blurted out, his voice cracking again. But it was too late — she was already halfway out the door. "Come back please!" He yelled out as if that would be enough to convince her. His hands were shaking and he felt as though his chest was going to explode. He was going to lose the only person he truly cared for.
She shot him a look over her shoulder. "Don't worry though, you have a line of girls waiting for you." She spoke strongly.
His heart sank at sarcastic comment. She was right though. He knew as much. The thought of other women wanting him was always something he liked hearing. It made him feel attractive. It made him feel as though he had options. A part of him was beginning to realize why he treated her so shitty in the first place. He didn't like the realization — not one bit.
