Keep Your Enemies Closer

~ hope in the middle of darkness ~

She traced a water drop down the windowpane, her head resting against the wall. The days would pass by in the activities around the home where she had busied herself, but the nights were especially long and painful. Given Zaviyar's numerous activities during the day, it was always post sunset that he would return and they would get time together. She had gotten accustomed to his laughter, his scent, the 'accidental' touches, the feeling of his gaze on her, and just simply, his presence. The room she was in was unfamiliar, and felt especially cold and dark without him being there.

Love, in certain aspects, is a lot like rain. When the first drop falls into the heart, one can never be aware of how intense the pouring is going to be. More often than not, the rain is only enough to wet the surface of the heart and keep it alive. To keep it living and breathing, just how casual rains keep plants alive.

However, there are rare instances where the pouring floods up the entire heart, and fills it with an overwhelming amount of love. The kind of love that overpowers and leaves no room for any emptiness. The love that embraces you whole.

For all her life, Zaira had believed the latter kind was only restricted to stories and fantasies. But she had found herself living and breathing this reality. Zaviyar's love had encompassed her entire being to the point there was no longer a Zaira without a Zaviyar.

She pulled the shawl - his shawl - closer to her body, taking in the warmth and scent of it. It's an extreme kind of love which provides security and comfort despite physical distance. It's the union of hearts and souls which are beyond the confines of time and space. What Zaira felt for Zaviyar was too intense to be affected by the circumstances. He was still here, as close to her as he had ever been.

As close as he had been a few nights ago.

Her mind replayed the scene from the night they parted ways for the umpteenth time and like every single time, it made her feel a range of emotions.

The night was reaching its darkest hours, which meant that the morning was closer than they hoped. Time is an unfathomable phenomenon. The same seconds that feel like an eternity in moments where you wish for them to pass sooner, pass by without notice when you wish to freeze them. There were nights which were unbearable on them both - the initial nights of their marriage where they couldn't bear with the other's presence, and then other nights where the yearning for one another was almost palpable, but there was an unbreakable wall in between them. Those nights had been long and painful.

In stark contrast was this night which they both wished would never end. The night where their love had reached its completion. The night which was going to be the last they spent together for an indefinite amount of time. Yet, the night kept passing by faster than the speed of light. They were unable to steal a few more moments of proximity, without the looming threat of distance.

Distance is one thing when you are unaware of the sweetness of proximity. When the only reality concerning closeness is an idea in your mind with no physical manifestation. However, once that idea becomes a lived reality, once you have broken down all walls to become one, the idea of being apart becomes all the more painful.

It was with that pain lingering around the corner that Zaira kept snuggling closer into Zaviyar, knowing fully well that the clock was ticking and they had to part ways. She just could not bring herself to let go.

Zaviyar felt a teardrop on his bare chest. Then another. And another.

"Zaira, tum ro rahi ho?"

A sniff.

"Nahi to. Mein to nahi ro rahi."

He raised his head slightly and saw her hiding her face in his chest, which was getting damper by the second. A small smile made its way up his face as he sat up straighter.