Trishalini ~ The Jewel of Mahabaleshgarh

26 ~ Sorry

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Abhinandan POV

The bed, once a place of comfort, now felt like a prison. Just a few steps away, her proximity felt like an impossible distance, amplifying my unease and restlessness.

The source of my unease eluded me, a puzzle I could not solve, a feeling I could not name.

And the moment I saw her standing before the mirror, with every piece of jewellery torn, I realised she was as broken as I was. Her gaze never felt that empty. It used to have empathy and smile for me, but tonight, it had nothing.

Her words pierced my chest, and I could not help but feel guilty about how it had happened. I did not want to marry her like this, but she left me no option. I could not see her getting married to anyone else.

But I could not see her like this either.

The moment she held hushed me down, I understood how mad she was. She never cut me off. And the way she took me towards the bed, ready to do everything, made me feel weak. I could not touch her, not like that.

I could not make up my mind to be near her.

And, when she broke eye contact, I just could not sit there. I came back to my chamber and palmed my face.

I did not know how I should feel toward her. I did not know if I should appreciate what she did for my father or be angry with her for not telling me about his proposal, his health, or how he took off his turban before her.

The turban was everything for us. It was our pride and power, significant in every clan. Putting it down meant kneeling before someone. I did not expect him to do that, especially for me. Somewhere, I felt responsible for everything that happened.

If I had not gone away, he would not have done that after knowing that I felt pity for him as much as anger.

Now, I knew why she had accepted and hidden his proposal from me. And what I did in exchange was hurt her.

I hated myself. I hated everything I did.

And it was eating me. I could not even look into her eyes. It held anger for me, and it bothered me.

I could not sleep the whole night, so I left the bed when it was time to get ready. After freshening up, I walked out into the garden to breathe fresh air.

The pigeons began landing in the open land, and I asked the attendee to bring their grains. Seeing them, I felt at ease. I sat down on the stairs, and they would wish me morning. I could not help but smile.

One of them sat on my knee and looked into my eyes. "How are you?" I asked, rubbing my finger on her head. She walked away a little and ate. Only in a few moments did thousands of pigeons arrive and start making their morning noise. I saw them fight over the grains, run behind each other, and play. Some of them were enjoying themselves in the pond.

Suddenly, I saw Trisha standing on her side of the garden with a group of attendees.

I could not help but lower my gaze. I knew she was angry with me. But she had to understand that I had my reasons. I told her not to marry Shantanu, and I was right. I could not bear any other woman in my life.

But it seemed like I could not even bear her now.

I did not know how I would even talk to her, let alone have sex.

Sex?

No!

But it had to be done.

But not until she was angry. If I could not look into her eyes, I could even go near her. I closed my eyes, feeling utterly stupid. What the hell was I even thinking?