(COMPLETED)Various X F!Reader One Shots

Period Pampering(Musical!Beetlejuice X Reader)

My time has come so cue the period comfort one shot I've written dozens of times. This time, with clones. So there's that little bit of variety.

He's out of character in this, fuck me. I need to start using "(Y/N)" instead of "babes" more with him. Even though he rarely calls Lydia her first name in the series. He uses "babes" and "Lyds" way more than her actual name.

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You had gotten your period at work today and your cramps were churning your stomach as you walked through the door. You left your stuff at the door and made a beeline for your room. You grabbed your pajamas and a new pair of underwear then went to the bathroom. You came out changed and clean-faced thirteen minutes later.

The living room was your next stop. You collapsed onto the couch. You winced at the pain in your abdomen and your lower back. You couldn't take pain pills due to your medicinal resistence and Excedrin was your diamond in the rough, but it was too late to take it since it had caffeine in it. Staying up until two in the morning wasn't on your bucket list.

"Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice," you chanted.

The ghost appeared in front of you with a happy smile. "Hey, babes." He then sniffed the air. "Why do I smell blood?" He sniffed again. "Whoa, and a shit ton of hormones."

"I got my period at work. I call it the 'monthly sacrifice'," you said.

Beetlejuice laughed. "That's a good one."

You giggled a bit at his humored reaction then inhaled through your teeth. "Ow."

"Do you need-" he started then cut himself off. "Wait, your body hates pain pills. Never mind."

"I can't take Excedrin, either," you said. 

"Isn't that the only pill that works?" he asked.

"Yeah, but I can't take it until tomorrow. It has caffeine in it and I don't wanna stay up all night," you explained.

"Aren't you off tomorrow, though? You can sleep in," he said.

"My body clock won't let me," you said.

"Fair," he said. His eyes seemed to glow as he got an idea. "(Y/N), as your ghost with the most, it's my job to take care of you when you're feeling shitty. So, until your period's over, I'm your personal servant." He then smirked. "More like 'we'. Fellas!"

He snapped his fingers, to which four clones appeared in a large green cloud of smoke and stood in a line beside him on both sides with the real Beetlejuice in the middle. They all smiled happily at you.

"Tell us what to do, sweetness," one clone spoke. 

"You don't have to do this, Bee," you said. "I'm not an invalid."

"You bleed once a month for a week and you give birth. You need to be worshiped on your period," another clone chimed. Every Beetlejuice agreed.

"I wanna, (N/N)," Beetlejuice said. "Your wish is our command."

"...Can you? I feel weird having my own personal Beetlejuice staff," you said.

He winked at you. "Get used to it." He pointed at each clone as he commanded them. "Foot bath, hand massage, food, and drinks." He looked at you. "Any cravings?"

"A lot of junk food, but I really don't wanna indulge like that," I said.

"Top three. Is that easier?" Beetlejuice said.

"Food and drink or either or?" I asked.

"Both. So, six total," he clarified.

"Just (favorite drink) for the drink and (favorite candy), (favorite chips), and- wait, does it include dinner?" I said.

"Nope," he smiled.

"(Favorite candy), (favorite chips), and (favorite baked good)," you listed. "Do you wanna do dinner?"

"Nah," he said. "All yours, babes."

"I'm craving (favorite fast food) for some reason," you said.

"Did you hear that, you two?" he asked the food and drink clones. They nodded. "Good. Get to it. You don't wanna keep your goddess waiting." He winked at you.

You giggled softly. All four clones got to work. Within thirty minutes, your feet were soaking in an epsom salt bath with the clone massaging them, your hands were being massaged with (favorite scent) lotion with a manicure planned afterwards, your dinner was being fed to you, the drink clone was styling your hair, and Beetlejuice was sitting next to you, massaging your stomach and abdomen. He was murmuring body praise into your ear.

"This feels like too much. Five of you?" you said with pink cheeks from the ghost's words.

"Nah, this isn't shit. Ten of me would be a lot. There can never be too much of me, but there isn't enough to do for ten," he said. He kissed your cheek. "How you doing, babes?"

"A lot better," you said then were fed a bite of (favorite candy). "Thank you, Beetlejuice."

"We love you, babes," every Beetlejuice sang at once, including himself. You giggled as they all kissed a part of your face in unison.

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As always, embrace your weirdness and I'll see you in the next one shot.

- The Self Shipping Weirdo