Hard. Thats the word I associate with life. If one were to ask me to describe life in a word, I would say it's hard. I suppose others would say 'fun','happy' or 'crappy' etc..
But the thing is it's different for everyone. And that's what I don't understand. Everyone says we are equal. That we all go through hardships and good times. All of us do.
But some people get more pain than happiness and vice versa.
I mean, I could compare my life to the teenage girl across the street and you could already notice some major contrasts.
Now I can't judge whether my life is better than hers or hers better then mine, buts it's very different. So there would have to be someone who is better off right?
And think about this. We all die at some point. Some people die of old age, others off more scary things. Some of which I don't exactly want to name. So I don't understand how that's equal. I mean yeah, I get the whole 'hard life, easy death' thing but.. I don't know.
Why the morbid thoughts? Well, Marcy died today.
Marcy is Chase's grandmother. She died naturally but the scary and sad thing is she was mid-word when she died. Mid-compliment actually.
She was telling me I was good for Chase when she..passed away.
It was really surprising. Its not like it was a heart attack. She just closed her eyes- for blinking - and they just never opened.
I wasn't sure at first. I thought she just fell asleep. I've seen people do that on tv. But TV is TV and I'm quite dumb to think she was just 'resting her eyes'.
We are now in the hospital. Chase's mom and dad are here as well. I thought his grandad would have come as well but apparently, Chase's grandparents were divorced.
I seemed to have meet the parents way sooner than I had expected. They were named Anna and Rob, which I came to know thought the brief introductory conversation we had.
I don't why we were waiting here. Why the doctor hadn't come out to tell us the depressing news. Why he was operating on someone who simply died of old age, peacefully. What's there to operate on her anyway? Chase told me she had no sicknesses or diseases. No cancer or anything nearly as deadly.
I knew she was dead. Anna and Rob know she's dead. Julie and Sylivia knew she was dead. But for some reason it didn't quite process in chase's mind.
He refused to believe she was gone.
"Can you please get me some coffee. I haven't had some in ages," he said. He bad 7 cups of coffee already. A whole weeks worth of coffee and he still wanted more.
"You have an empty cup in your hand and six others near you. I think you've had enough for a while," I told him.
He didn't argue.
The doctor came out informing us of the not-so-surprising new and I swear, I saw a few tears run down Chase's face.
Instead of reacting how I expected he stood up, sighed, bid everyone goodbye, and took me to his car.
Before he turned on the engine, he turned to me and said," I'm okay. It hurts but I'm okay," he smiled. I returned the favor and he drove off.
We didn't talk much. But it wasn't weird. I mean, yeah it was awkward at first but then silence became our way of letting each other now we were building our strength again.
He parked his car in my driveway. I thought we was going to walk me home but instead he came inside as well. He followed me to my room and sat on a chair.
I went and changed only to find a less clothed Chase on my bed.
This is not the time to ogle, Maddison.
I laid down next to him and he wrapped his arm around me.
Just like that.
He didn't say anything. but he didn't have to.
We fell asleep after that but before I drifted off to neverland I thought of a plan to make Chase happy and well..Chase again.
~~~
"Let's go fishing," Chase said out of the blue.
We were currently watching tv while sitting on the couch.
"Ummm..May I ask why?" I asked. Did he forget what happened yesterday.
"Yes you may. I wanna say sayonara to my gran one last time," he stated.
"What does that have to do with fishing?" I asked, confused.
"She used to take me to Lake Stant. We used to go fishing together. Even though he body will be buried. Her soul will always be at that lake. I want to talk to her," he sniffled, "I want to say goodbye," he said softly.
This made my heart break and so of course I agreed.
~~~
Before leaving Chase wrote down all the things he wanted to say to his Gran on a paper. He then folded it into a paper boat. We drove off to Lake Stant and it was yet another quite ride.
When we reached there I gave Chase some space. I sat on the rocks watching Chase stand on the river bank and talk to his Gran. The sun was setting, and Chase looked so vulnerable, I took a picture. Call me a white girl or whatever but it was so tumblr. Looking over the picture on my phone gave me the idea to make a scrapbook. It would start off oath how he said goodbye to his Gran.
He called me over and I ran up to where he was standing.
"I'm setting this boat free," he said. I smiled encouragingly.
With a deep breath and a faint smile he set the boat in the water. I gave a light push and the wind set it sail.
"Its ok. She knows," I comforted.
He nodded and hugged me. As he pulled back, He was crying but he was smiling, so I know he was going to be alright.
Because time heals what bandaids can't.
~~~
YASSSSS 2 updates in one day?!? Damn I'm on a role. So I hope you guys like this. And let me know what y'all think of this and tell me some ideas because from here on out I don't what I'll be writing about.
Okay so I'll give you guys a dare again. I dare you guys to tell one of your friends to read this. Thanks!
Love y'all.
VOTE
COMMENT
SPREAD THE WORD <3
