"Chase I'm gonna scream! Stay still," I said exasperated. "Please," I added as I pecked his cheek in an effort to bribe him. But did he listen? No, of course not. He kept moving his head.
"Can you fu cking stop poking my soul with these brushes?" he shot back.
"Can you chill? Wrinkles are hard to draw on," I gritted my teeth. This boy could not sit still. While my art skills were not the best, I think I did a pretty good job. In fact, I deserve an award.
After adding the final touches of creases under his eye, I finally handed him my compact mirror for him to see the final result.
"Please tell me I did not just sit there for forty hundred years for this. I still look young!" He exclaimed in a sassy ass voice that did not suit him.
"I can't work miracles yo," I replied, already working on my own face. Once I was done with the wrinkles, I added a little bit of pink lip tint (my lips were still kissable though according to Chase) and zipped up my makeup bag placing it in the compartment drawer of Chase's car.
"Hey how come your wrinkles are less intense than mine?"
"Because I said so," I shrugged.
"I can't believe I'm dating someone as lame as you," he groaned.
"Thanks dude, stop hitting on me," I said dryly. He opened his mouth to reply but decided against it and turned the car on instead.
"Okay so what's the plan?" I know this seems fun but truth be told, what we're doing is pretty illegal and without a solid plan and step by step instructions, we'll definitely mess up and end up joking Brandon in his cell.
"Well he's not exactly in prison," Didn't he say jail before? "He's just in a cell the concert stadium management put misbehaving concert goers," he informed me, all the while his eyes glued to road. Good, I need him to drive safely so I can strangle him when we read the fake jail.
"Bruh, why did we dress like this then? It's obviously not as serious as you had me believe," I said pointing at the baggy clothes we were sporting.
"Bailing someone out of a weird ass center isn't exactly memory making," he smiled. I rolled my eyes, a smile mirroring his permanently sitting on my face too.
"I'm gonna be deaf," I told him as he swerved into the rather small parking lot of the stadium. A few thousand concert goers he said? That must've been a hassle considering not even a 100 cars could fit in this little parking lot. Maybe there was an underground car park as well?
We walked out of the car and made our way to the main building. "Hi, a friend of mine has been detained and I'd like to know where I can go to free him," Chase said sweetly to the lady at the front desk. She looked about 20 years old and bored out of her mind. She was sporting a black bob and not to stereotype but she looked like the poster girl for a front desk attendant.
She smirked and said "Oh was he the guy that sang 'Bodak Yellow' in the tune of 'Chandelier'? He's honestly my hero." Mine too.
When neither of us responded and just gave her a nod, she unlocked the door I'm assuming led to the detention center, sighed and said, "Alright well, he's in there. I'll leave this open for you guys but convincing Big Steve to free him is all on you,"
"Who's the Big Steve?" I asked before I was met with a tall man clad in a blue security uniform. Very very tall.
"Right okay. Hi, I'm Chase and this is Maddison and we're friends of Brandon-" Chase started, "-the guy who you currently have locked up and he was probably drunk so if you'll please release him we'll get him to sober up and pay whatever fine he has to,"
"There isn't any fine," Big Steve clarified, "but this little bitch punched my nose while I tried locking him up so he's not getting out anytime soon." It was only then I noticed his slightly crooked nose. It was red too confirming his claim. Yikes that must have hurt. I mean I knew Brandon could pack a mean punch but I'd never actually seen the results of his work and I'd be pretty impressed if his punch didn't make freeing him all the more harder.
"It's not even that bad. Please let him out," I insisted. It was then that the large man finally looked at me. Or looked down at me.
"Sorry but I don't take orders from a grandma," he said in disdain. Shit! I forgot about this façade!
Pretending I didn't hear him I screamed, "Sorry what? Honey I left my hearing aid in the car," nudging Chase, I continued , "Would you be a dear and fetch it for me?" I turned to Steve this time as I said, "Marriage is a blessed thing. I have this gorgeous man always doing my bidding," I looked at Chase lovingly and discreetly motioned for him to go. I've got this.
"Yeah well thanks to this guy," Steve jerked his thumb in the direction of a passed out Brandon, "I'll never know what marriage is like," he said bitterly glancing at the floor.
"Oh pish posh," I waved my hands about, "Any girl would be lucky to have you." I realized I completely dropped the being deaf façade. Oh well, no going back now.
He looked up, "oh yeah? What about my nose?"
"Please. You look devine-," I stopped an idea popping into my head as a saw a rusty metal object in his pant pocket, "-or you would look devine if you changed out of these security guard clothes. Every woman likes a working man but show them you have a life out of work," I chuckled as I imagined an old lady would.
He contemplated what I said, chewing on the inside of his lip. "I have spare clothes in my locker," he offered.
I grinned, "Marvelous. How 'bout you go on and try them and I'll tell you if you will attract the ladies the way my old skin attract mosquitoes." He cringed when I said that but nevertheless headed to his locker and pulled out his spare clothes. He shot me an unsure smile and went to another room, possible a bathroom, to try his clothes on.
Once the door closed, I heard a slow clap and almost died of a heart attack. "Well played, Mad," Chase said.
I smirked, "I try." Glancing at the door, I said, "Okay, I think I saw a key in his pant pocket and I'm hoping it unlocks the cell. So when Steve comes out, you go in grab the key and throw it to me. I'll unlock the cell and you go pick Brandon up and take him to the car,"
"Jeez what will you be doing while I so all this?" he asked stressing the word 'all'.
I slapped his arm lightly, "What I've been doing this whole entire time: distracting Big Steve." Just as I pronounced the last syllable of his name, the door unlocked and out he came clad in a black polo and some jeans. He wasn't a particularly bulky man. In fact, his physic was pretty normal for a middle aged man.
"See! What did I tell ya'? You look great," I honestly don't even know what accent I'm sporting anymore. From the corner of eye I see Chase tiptoeing out of the bathroom, the key in his hand. I shake my head in an effort to tell him not to give it to me yet but my effort goes in vain when I see that he has already slid it on the floor in my direction. I quickly trap the skidding (and noisy) key under my shoe before looking at Steve.
"Thank you. You know what? I'm going to let your friend out," he smiles. I nervously smile back panicking the f uc k out. As he turns around I grab the key and throw it as far as I can praying it reaches the bathroom. To my luck, it lands on the pile of old clothes and while it didn't go exactly in the pocket, it's still a win to me.
Sighing, I smile gratefully as Steve unlocks the cell. Definitely never doing this again.
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hi! Okay so I wasn't planning on writing today but I opened up wattpad and saw someone that liked and commented and that motivated me so much aksjshsns so shoutout to A-silent-lover 💗
