'I'm beginning to think I imagined you all along'

VIII

Suha had experienced many cold nights whilst in Manchester. Rainy, dreary, miserable, ice cold nights, but nothing compared to the freezing temperature she was experiencing right at this moment. What was she going to do? She had seen that look in Aaron's eyes before and the words that he was throwing at her knocked her for six. She didn't know how to respond because all she could picture were the tears streaming down his cheeks, the hatred and anger in his voice, the way he couldn't even look her in the eyes. How could she respond this time? How could she possibly convince Aaron that he was the only one she wanted, the only one she's ever wanted. "Aaron, what's going on here? Why is Daley bleeding?" Suha said, her voice was so timid, shy a whisper almost. Aaron really didn't have the words, he didn't know if he was angry or upset but what he knew that what he was feeling felt so far away from love. Daley was still wincing from the pain in his nose, it was probably broken and his cheekbone couldn't have been much better off, still covering his face with his hands he makes a brisk exit for the door, he says to Suha as he's leaving "you two need to talk" before brushing right past her, heading out into the lobby and closing the door behind him. 

Suha looks at Aaron who is making his way over to the sofa, he sits down before resting his elbows on his knees and placing his head in hands, she cannot bare the thought of him hurting. She walks over to him and places her hand gently on his shoulder "Aaron?" she says, softly. "Don't." Aaron snaps at her, before shrugging his shoulder forcing Suha's hand off him and leaving her at a loss with how to handle this situation. She's wrong for not saying anything to him, but she's wrong for trying to talk to him, what else can she do? She starts to clear the empty food cartons from the sofa and the floor before 'Cornerstone' starts to play from the ipod dock as she's making her way over to the kitchen. She turns to look at Aaron who is already looking up at her "Do you remember this night Suha? the night that I told you I loved you for the first time?" he gives a breathy laugh before shaking his head and running his hands through his hair. Suha does remember this night, she remembers it being one of the best nights of her life. Aaron says "I would have loved you forever, stupidly i had dedicated myself to you and this is what i get in return.. " Suha slams the empty cardboard cartons down on the counter in the kitchen, enraged by the words falling out of Aaron's mouth before walking over to him. "Dedicated yourself to me Aaron? are we forgetting the time that you spend with your ex girlfriend? Don't act like a fucking saint. The fact that you even think I am capable of doing something to hurt you this way hurts me, do you not trust me at all? I thought we were stronger than this, I thought we had overcome these kind of barriers" Suha had held everything about Colleen in for so long, and now she was beginning to scare hself, all these thoughts she'd had and all these things that she'd held back on saying would all come tumbling out. "Overcome these kind of barriers? you slept with your ex boyfriend behind my fucking back, in OUR bed, it's not just something that you can 'overcome' as you so politely put it. Yes, I spent time with my ex girlfriend and yes we kissed but this is nowhere near the same thing. I've seen pictures Suha, I know what happened"

Suha's eyes widen, he's seen pictures? What pictures? Pictures of what?! It was becoming clearer to her that Daley had used her to get exactly what he wanted, and that was revenge. Revenge for the way that she left him, the way that she wouldn't forgive him and for the fact that she simply didn't want to try and fix things, but who can blame her? Daley broke her heart and he did it in the most horrific fashion. "No Aaron, you don't know what happened and that's the problem" Suha bursts into tears and covers her face with her hands, sobbing into her palms "Aaron I didn't.. I would never-" Aaron gets up from the sofa and stands before her, Suha lowers her hands, she looks directly up at Aaron and cannot read the expression on his face. She swallows the lump in her throat, waiting for Aaron to speak to her, to hold her, to shout at her, to do anything, but him having absolutely no reaction was torture for her. "Aaron.. please" she says through tears. He's looking down at her beautiful brown eyes and wondering where everything went wrong, how did they even get here? He's seeing tears streaming down her face but doing nothing to prevent them from falling, he wants her to hurt, the way that he's been hurting for the past 24 hours. "I want you to leave, I don't want this, I don't want you" Aaron says, completely expressionless and with no feeling whatsoever in his voice, a monotone sentence that cuts right through Suha, it hits her like a train and she can feel her body convulsing, her chest contorting and her stomach twisting. She knew that this was coming. "Aaron you aren't listening to me i-" "No Suha, you aren't listening to me. You can't even be honest with me. I can't even hear it from your own lips? You wont even tell me the truth." Aaron is so calm on the outside with his response, but inside he is churning up. What he's said is true he would have loved her forever, she was his forever, but how could he ever forgive her?