'I'm beginning to think I imagined you all along'

XVIII

Suha swallows the lump down that has quickly formed in her throat, her mouth is dry and she feels so disorientated. Confused at the only words to escape Aaron's mouth being about Daley. How was she even suppose to respond to this? Why was Aaron home and on his own? Why does she feel like they've gone back 2 steps when they were making such progress. Her head felt heavy and so did her heart.
"Aaron, I literally only spoke to him today. He came over and apologised to me and I told him I don't think you would ever forgive him, that's it" Suha is looking into Aaron's eyes, her expression awash with sincerity.

"I promise you, Luke was just dropping me off home and giving Daley a lift too" Aaron was looking at her with a blank expression until he got another shooting pain in his leg and scrunched his face up and clung onto his leg. Suha looks at him, her heart almost beating out of her chest with anxiety.
"What have you done.." Suha says to him, worried, putting her hands on top of his. She looks at him and then looks around the room. Their photo's all smashed scattered across the floor, his walking frame the other side of the room. The coffee table almost broken in two with beer all over the floor, now soaking into the knee's of her leggings. The iPod was on the floor, the screen cracked, it was probably broken too. She looks back at him.
"Will you speak to me, please" She says as gives Aaaron's hand a squeeze. Aaron lifts his eyes from the floor and looks at Suha, ashamed
"I'm sorry. Can you please help me?" Aaron says in a low, gruff voice, he looks across the room at the mess that he has created and lets out a sigh. This is so out of character for him and he knows it deep down.
"Please" he repeats, his voice almost breaking
Suha stands up and picks up his walking frame from the other side of the room. She holds out her arms to Aaron get onto his feet and moves her hands in a 'come-hither' motion
"Put your arms around my neck, okay? And I will lift you up. When you're on your feet i'll put your frame in front of you, got it?" She was stern with him, still annoyed that he had yet again jumped to conclusions upon seeing her getting out of the car with Luke and Daley. After everything that they had already been through, was he seriously going to keep assuming the same things over and over again?
"Okay, let's do it. After 3?" Aaron asks, Suha nods her head and counts to three and pulls him up to his feet, he puts all his weight onto Suha's shoulders and on his good leg, they share a moment, a soft gaze before Suha steps to the side with Aaron's arms still holding to her tightly, she pulls his frame in front of him. His body lurches forward as he slams all of his weight down onto the support frame, and he wraps his hands tightly around it. Beads of sweat are running down Aaron's forehead and temples, his hair is sticking to him and his breathing is making it even more apparent that he is in quite a lot of discomfort and that this was a lot harder for him than he was letting on.
"Thank you" he says, through gritted teeth, his eyes still glued to the floor.
About the mess.." he starts
"Forget it. Just sit down" Suha says bluntly, her back is to him as she's walking over to the kitchen to find something to mop the floor with. Aaron hobbles over to the sofa and sits down, this in itself was a difficult task. Suha can hear that he's in pain from the sounds that are happening across the room. She feels terrible and hates seeing him in such a bad way. Suha makes her way back over to the living room and starts clearing everything up, she picks up the picture frames and is careful of the glass shards decorating the floor, she places what is left of them back onto the bookshelves, she picks up the iPod and the dock and places them both on the coffee table that Aaron also nearly broke. She shakes her head and lets out a loud sigh unintentionally and mops the floor with a cloth before taking it over to the sink and wringing it out. Aaron has put the TV on but Suha can feel his eyes burning into her back, he's watching everything that she's doing, like a child waiting to be forgiven. The silence in the room was unnerving.
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming back." She asks, as kindly as she can muster
"I wanted to surprise you, I thought it would be nice, Ollie brought me home" he replies, his words are almost a whisper, ashamed of the way he's acted. Aaron is still holding his leg as he shuffles around on the sofa to get comfortable.
"Oh it was a surprise alright. A complete mess in here wasn't it. Just what exactly is this all about?" Suha turns around and looks at him, still quite cold
"Come on Aaron, what's going on. Do you not trust me?"
"Baby you know I do, I just see red when I see Daley. He nearly broke us apart. That's all" Aaron is clearly still ashamed of the mess that he's made, especially after the talks they had had in the hospital no less than a day ago. He can never find the right words to say, he was rubbish at this kind of thing. Even in interviews at Arsenal he barely knew what to say without feeling embarrassed or shy. Always fumbling around with his beard or his hair as his cheeks burst into life in the colour red.
Suha makes her way over to the sofa and sits on the seat next to Aaron, she places Aaron's hand in hers, taking everything in her stride she tries to defuse the tension and fix the situation.
"Please don't be angry with me, be angry with him. I told you everything that I need to say you in the hospital yesterday. We both did. Let's not go backwards" Suha reaches over to Aaron, his sorrowful expression plain to see.
"I love you, more than i've ever loved anybody, more than I ever will" she says, as she reaches over to cup her hand on the side of Aaron's jaw and neck, his rugged, wirey, ginger-tinged beard tickling the palms of her hand. His eyes are crestfallen and he looks lost. She pulls him towards her and they share a prolonged kiss. Running her fingers through Aaron's soft, thick, messy hair, she kisses his jaw softly before leaning her head in towards his
"I'm so sorry. I'm right where I belong and I promise won't do anything to ruin this. I love you too" he says softly. Suha sends him a warm smile
"Now, is there anywhere else you're hurting? Tell me what you need me to do and i'll do it" she says,
Still locked in their embrace Aaron shakes his head, and for a moment their noses brushes against each other's, he pulls his head up a little and kisses the end of Suha's nose
"Just be here, with me, that's the only thing I need" he confesses.