Jax x Reader ~Enemies to Lovers~

Chapter Twenty: Wait...he cares?

 Everything around me felt numb. I couldn't feel anything, hear anything, everything around me went black. It felt like a bunch of pins and needles were pricking at my skin, with the desire for me to finally wake up--to snap back to reality. But it felt impossible. Though, everything at this point felt impossible.

However, after an eternity of being surrounded in pitch black, I felt a pair of arms tightly wrap around my waist as my legs touched the soft yet grainy ground. A hum escapes my lips as my eyes flutter open, taking in my surroundings slowly. My vision was still blurry and spotty, the world was feeling like it was spinning around me faster and faster, not intending to slow down anytime soon.

"Y/N, can you hear me?" A voice cut through my subconscious like a knife, making my vision slowly clear up as a purple rabbit character came into view--which was Jax, of course. Who else would it be?

What happened? My thoughts rang through my head as confusion seemed to overwhelm me. One moment I was on a sea dragon with Jax, and the next I'm on the sandy sea floor as Jax is looking at me with concern engulfing his expression.

"W-What...?" I heard my voice stutter, yet it didn't sound like me. It sounded weak. Confused. Pathetic.

His voice sounded muffled and distant, yet I tried my best to make out each syllable as he spoke. "...You really shouldn't scare me like that, you know? Why didn't you just tell me to stop the dragon if you were just--" He didn't finish his sentence, his words seeming to be getting stuck in his throat.

What was he talking about? What happened to make him so...worked up?

"What? I'm confused," I muttered as I tried to fully sit up, but his arms prevented me from doing so, which were still wrapped around my waist tightly.

"You passed out," He stated bluntly, giving me a 'are you kidding me?' look on his face. "You can't just lie to me like that. If you weren't doing okay, just say something and we could've figured something out that didn't involve the dragon...as much as I loved the ride, if you weren't okay with it, then you should've said something. Idiot." During those last few words, his voice wavered a bit, like he was genuinely terrified.

Guilt intertwined my heart as I heard his voice waver. His grip on me was still firm, almost like he was scared of letting go, in case I would disappear into thin air or something.

"I'm fine, Jax," I tried telling him while trying to get out of his grasp. Realizing he was still holding onto me, he let go, letting me finally having room to breathe. "I was just a bit lightheaded. It was nothing to stop Del about." As I said those words, I noticed Delfine standing behind Jax, her soft blue right eye gazing at mine, like she was trying to search for what I was feeling at the moment.

He sighed. "If you were fine, you wouldn't have passed out. We're doing the rest of this search on foot, whether you like it or not, Y/N. We don't need you passing out again."

His eyes gazed at me, almost like he was disappointed at needing to do the rest on foot instead of on the dragon, like he probably wants, which is what made panic rise into my throat.

"We-- We don't have to stop. If you like the ride that much, then--"

"Just because I like a damn ride, doesn't mean I want to see you pass out," His voice was wavering, on the brink of anger or crying, I couldn't tell...but either of those options scared me. "I don't want to see somebody I--" He stopped himself for a moment, taking a deep breath before speaking in a more calmer tone. "I don't want to see you distressed. We'll look for another way to find this pearl, unless the others already found it."

I never saw him so...upset before. Normally he's pretty composed, fully sarcastic, witty, and straight-up annoying sometimes. But now? None of those characteristics I know him for are present in his tone. He just seems so...scared, and that's a first. I sighed as I slowly stood up.

"Why do you care anyway?" I questioned him, pressing on. "I mean, it was just two days ago you were making fun of me for literally everything I was afraid of. Why care now of all times?"

"Because those were f*beep*ing trivial!" Jax swore. For the first damn time that I've known him. "Being afraid of rollercoasters, versus being literally petrified of this entire adventure are completely different! And if you think I would just be fine with seeing you genuinely panic, then I'm hurt that you had that impression on me."

I winced at his harsh tone, practically yelling at me at this point, which left me dumbfounded and confused. Doesn't he hate me? Isn't that what he was SO prideful for when I first arrived in this circus...four days ago?? What's with the sudden change?

Without saying anything more, he turned back around and walked back over to Delfine, leaving me completely stunned and...guilt-ridden. Completely guilt-ridden. What sucks the most, is that he seems to care about me more than I even gave him credit for, to the point he got mad at me for thinking that he hated me when he literally told me he hated me in the beginning of our enemy-ship. But now...? I'm not so sure.

"Are you coming, or are you just going to stand there?" I heard Jax ask, his hands crossed over his chest like he was waiting for me. I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak another word as I walked over to him as we started walking to find that pearl.

The entire time we were walking, along with Delfine who was still stuck by our side, I stayed silent, and so did he. We didn't utter a single word to one another, completely wrapped up in our own separate thoughts. I bit my lip as guilt started weighing me down by a lot. I wish I figured out sooner, that he actually seemed to care about me. But no, I was wrapped up in my own little fantasy that he hated me and for what, exactly? What has been my motive throughout the entire ordeal?

But after excruciating minutes of silence, I decided to break it, albeit hesitantly. "I'm sorry, okay? I thought you hated me. I mean, when we proclaimed that we hated each other four damn days ago, I took it literally and I doubted you would care if...I don't know...if something happened to me or whatever. I know it's stupid, but...I genuinely thought you didn't give a sh*beep*."

"I didn't. Originally, anyway," He spoke. "You were annoying, dumb, and a tad but anger-prone for my liking. But after a while, that hatred started to fizzle out. I don't know...you just grew on me, in a way. If you didn't, I wouldn't be willingly hanging out with you, would I? But you're still pretty annoying, and that won't seem to change anytime soon."

"Hey," I hissed. "I am not."

"Are too," He clapped back, that same smug smile that I'm so used to inching its way back on his face. "Besides, is being annoying really that bad of a thing?"

"Fair point," I muttered in defeat. "So, the TL;DR of your entire sentiment is that you care about me?"

He scoffed. "I never said that. I just don't wanna see somebody pass out. I would say that about anybody, though. Even if it...would be funny, at first."

"You're such an a*beep*ole," I growled as I glared daggers in his direction, finally feeling a little bit back to normal...even if my heart was still racing from being this deep underwater, I'm just trying to ignore it for the time being.

"Right back at ya, sweetheart," He chuckled with a sly grin, making me wanna punch him into orbit.

Even with our differences, maybe there's something that I can't really deny anymore. With these past four days, we've gotten closer to each other, that much is obvious. Sure, he doesn't want to admit it, but I guess I finally have the guts to, something I didn't have a day prior to today.

I care about him, and...maybe he cares about me too. That, I will count as something.

Always.

~~~

Okay...I kinda hate this chapter a bit, since I feel like the tension and progression went too quickly but oh well-- I can't change how I've already written a chapter. However, even though I feel indifferent towards this chapter, I still hope you guys liked reading it regardless of its obvious writing flaws. I hope you will have a wonderful rest of your day/night! <3

-Sincerely, CB